Don't have an account? To participate in discussions consider signing up or signing in
facebook connect
Sign-up, its free! Close [x]


  • okay Create lasting relationships with other like minded women.
  • okay Blogging, let your voice be heard!
  • okay Interact with other women through blogs,questions and groups.
  • okay Photo Album, upload your most recent vacation pictures.
  • okay Contests, Free weekly prize drawing.
  • okay Weekly Newsletter.

article image

Afraid of CHANGE - Changing Aspects Of A Relationship And Relationship Maintenance

By M. Douglas

Even though change is an inevitable part of life, many people often fear any kind of change. Therefore, it is no surprise that when things start changing within a relationship it could cause one or both partners to question their relationship. These changes can be something as small as you not getting a haircut or letting go as far as your image is concerned. You need to understand that just because things are changing; it does not mean it is a bad thing. It simply means your partner is getting very comfortable with you and probably does not feel the need to impress anymore. However, if your relationship is changing and you don't know why, read on to know some common changes that relationships go through and why people don't like those changes:


When you and your partner met for the first time, he or she was probably attracted to you on the basis of how you presented yourself. Later, they probably got to know you as a person and learnt to appreciate you for who you are and not how you look. While this is great, after a while you might get so comfortable in the relationship that you stop keeping a check on your appearance.

Why your partner hates it: Even if your partner does love you for the person you are and you have reached a point in your relationship where it does not matter how you look anymore, impressions still count.

Maybe not at a superficial level where you have to look good all the time. But, just because you are comfortable with someone does not mean you can go around looking like a complete mess. Your partner still has to look at you and feel attracted to you. So if your feel you have started to let go of your image – stop and learn to take better care of yourself.


In the beginning of a relationship, you are angling for a commitment from your partner. Therefore, you will always be well behaved. You probably won't burp or talk with your mouth full. Once you get your commitment though, you might start being yourself and yes, an occasional burp is only human and excusable. But making a habit of it, unmindful of your partner watching is another thing all together.

Why your partner hates it: It might be surprising to your partner that his or her prince or princess charming is a big slob. No one is asking you to be proper at all times, but even if you are 100 per cent committed to your partner, a few courtesies like excusing yourself when you burp, won't kill you.


You could not stop complimenting your partner when you first met him or her and now you barely notice them.

Why your partner hates it: If you stop noticing your partner, he or she might think you are running out of love for him or her. If your partner gets a new haircut or buys new clothes, try to notice it and give him or her occasional compliments, it will keep the romance in your relationship alive.



From remembering every single detail about his or her life, you start to forget important dates like birthdays and anniversaries.

Why your partner hates it: Well it is pretty obvious. A birthday or an anniversary is an important occasion that everyone would like to be wished for. Even if you regret forgetting and get him or her the best birthday present – they will still feel bad that you forgot. So, don't be insensitive and forget, make a note of it somewhere and you'll avoid a lot of relationship trouble.


If you constantly get irritable when you used to control your temper around him or her, your partner has good reason to get annoyed.

Why your partner hates it: Consider his or her perspective: They entered the relationship with a seemingly even-tempered person, but he or she turns out to be an impatient, bad-tempered stress case. How fair is that?


You used to be happy to spend time with his or her family, but now you're not as willing. Or maybe you used to put up with seeing the occasional romantic comedy and now you only want to watch action or girly flicks. If you used to make compromises, but now you're completely inflexible, you might want to reconsider your change of behaviour.

Why your partner hates it: Of all the relationship changes people hate, this is probably the most serious offence. People tend to be compromising by nature, and if your boyfriend girlfriend doesn't see you reciprocating, you might get thrown out of the door. One of the benefits of a long-term relationship is that you can finally loosen up and stop trying to impress the other person, but be careful not to go to the other extreme.

About the Author

Michael Douglas is a relationship expert and he deals with various problems and issues in a relationship viz. relationship communication, insecurity in relationship, commitment in relationship 

Member Comments