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Benefits
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Benefits
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Feminism has been alive and thriving for over 40 years, but is it giving us what we want?
Thriving it may be, but whether it's alive and well is another question altogether. Recently I read an article pointing to the fact that women are actually significantly less happy today than 30 years ago. How can this be? You would think that all the years of "progress" towards equalizing rights, shrinking the pay gap and the ever-growing number of women attaining advanced degrees would promote better feelings and happiness, yet the statistics indicate otherwise.
One explanation is that women have, for many years, felt that they perform dual occupations: career woman and domestic attendant. At the end of the workday, women would come home to wrangle all the household chores and still needed to be done. However, experts disagree about the soundness of this hypothesis; some counter with statistical evidence showing that the workload (workday combined with other obligations) of both men and women has decreased since 1965. Technology has advanced tremendously in the domestic field, with an ever-expanding array of helpful household cleaning appliances that take a chunk out of the workload. Remember Roomba?
But just because the workload has been diminished slightly doesn't mean women don't spend the same amount of time thinking about the chores left to be done. The counter argument to the technology-based theory, is that women may have more help to accomplish their domestic tasks, but that these new devices can't take off the mental pressure women feel to "get it all done."
Perhaps the unhappiness is better linked to the fact that when women in the past several decades fought so fiercely to join the ranks of, and even replace men in the workplace, they really didn't know what they were getting into. Neil Lyndon, author of, No More Sex War, believes feminists never gave men enough credit for having it tough. Spending hours away from the family is tough, gender-regardless, he argues. Having young children, a (demanding) job and additional mental preoccupations (aging parents, marriage concerns, ex-spousal concerns...) means decreased happiness.
There are also non-work-related grievances that women are faced with more these days than thirty-years ago. Divorce rates are sky-high, not to mention the pay gap has not been filled in completely. Getting through the grind is getting more difficult, it seems.
Women are not coping well with their stresses and concerns, too. These days, women aren't eating their feelings, so much as spending them. Having an independent source of income means having more money at one's disposal; in one online survey, reportedly 79% of women take themselves on shopping sprees to calm their nerves. While shopping, they experience a kind of buzz, a high that comes with buying something new and shiny, getting the shopping bag and experiencing feelings of temporary happiness. The worst part of all is this feeling quickly fades, leaving them no happier than before the shopping trip.
So what can we do to combat our anxieties and worries? The answer does not lie in your freezer, no, Ben and Jerry's won't fix this pickle. What has been reported as a good longer-term solution, is reestablishing a system of support—creating a community to cheer you on. Women often lose touch with extended family and old friends, and then neglect to rebuild close ties later on in life. So here's the treatment: call your old friends, talk to an old lady, join a book club, worst comes to worst, call your mother. Do what it takes to find those feel-good feelings without swiping your credit card or digging into Duncan Heinz.
Nope.....it settled a few things with reference to Activities of Daily Living (ADLs), such as the washing machine, dishwasher, prepackaged food items,
but with equality???*NO WAY*
It is worse.
There is a website called Jesus is savior .com....it shows bibically how we as woman have been deceived! You might not agree with a lot of things but many of the things we are still suffering is because we don’t want to really acknowledge what a female’s true role in Christ Jesus is.
Paul discusses in one of the letters to the 7 churches ( I think) about how he would rather women would be in charge of the household affairs, keep the home and rear the children in the way they should go, but chicks have other ideas....Sounds like that first woman (EVE)!!!!
Just a quick comment about the work load diminishing—I often wonder if that is actually true. Even though I have time-saving devices, my experience has been that I expect myself to get MORE done in any given timeframe than my mother or grandmother did. Their lifestyle was at a slower pace than mine.
Julie
[Link Removed]
I used to feel that way Bernadette,but when I was almost faced with loosing a marriage...I had to turn back to the only thing I know that would give me hope! Jesus! I had to finally admit to myself:"I can not make this work on my own strength." It was just too much! I had to confess and say: "Lord I need you"!!!
Classic Example: last night we were preparing to leave for a couple of days! My husband was saying stuff that he knew just was not right! Like I wanted to braid our daughter's hair with some newer braids just a few...he states" well you had all day." And I said: "all day?" Now in my youth and if I was into the feminist movement, my neck veins would have been bulging...but since he has shown me that I can have freedom via "fruits of the spirit" I don't have to have the last word and the Lord gives me peace and my mouth can keep shut! I choose very carefully where I want to go and how far it needs to be taken! Over 99% of the stuff, NOT EVEN WORTH ME GETTING OUT OF BREATH OVER! I just do what needs to be done and let the Lord handle the rest!I realized that when I am in his will and in his grace....I don't have to prove nothing to my hubby or justify what I am doing when I know what the Lord wants me do...it is way more freedom for me in this manner than what I was doing in my youth!
I think the portions of feminism that worked to remove some of our powers, is actually and sadly what prevails and what has prevailed. Women, we are some powerful creatures, but for me, Jesus does it just fine. I can pray, sing a hymn and just read a scripture or two and feel better. No it’s not instant, and some days, even those things don’t seem to work, but for me, it’s what I chose to do. Back to our power. The movement was twisted and catorted in such a form, NOT BY WOMEN, until some women, don’t know how to be women/ladies. I don’t have a problem with my husband doing the stereotypical things a man does around the house because let’s face it, I believe men do certain things better, and I believe women do certain things better, not that one is inferior to the other in either instance. Yes, I can take out the trash, install our window air consitioner, etc., but I prefer my husband to do this. I am sure when he watches our son for a little while, or takes him out, he doesn’t give that warm nuture and communication that a mom would, because women, we are better at that.
Equality. I wouldn’t say feminism failed in this aspect, but I don’t think the movement did or does enough to ensure workplace equality, namely pay, is the norm and not the exception. I still cringe when I hear on the average, women still make around $.70 on every dollar a man does. And let’s be real, being a black woman, on the average, I can make considerably less than my white counterparts, not because I am unqualified, or underqualified, but that’s just the way it is. I think our hypersensitivity towards who should do what has made us all fail in just getting it done.
This article makes some good points. When I began staying with the man of my house, I found out the hard way that his career aspirations were much more humble than mine. Just about everyone here (L.A) wants to be in show business or power player, drive a nice new car (with a vintage luxury, just because), maintain a bank account and so on but very few want to pay the price.
I don’t make a lot of money but my going to classes around full-time work hours has paid off. Yet on the flip side, I have to put in 6-day work weeks and he does not understand that I have have some dues to pay in order to retire nicely.
With the economy being what it is, I probably will give the corporate world another spin but one thing is for certain, is that men (and back-stabbing women) will not get the best of me. I say if any woman is in that predicament, start investing. Not Kate Spade bags or a sports car but make small stocks and other investments work for you.
Create lasting relationships
with other like minded women.