2. I am scared of mice.  

I don’t like to see mice in movies, commercials, photos. I don’t like rubber mice or cat toys that look like mice. The thought of mice even right now writing about them as I am will make me jumpy for a bit. That is how scared of mice I am.

When I was just a little girl of 2 or 3, we lived in a house that had mice, mice mice every where. Yes I know it is odd that I remember something from that little - I think because it was so scary to me that it stuck. It was rental house as my dad was transferred quite a bit those first years of working with the company he works with. The house had a dirt cellar/basement. One that could be accessed from the inside of the house. Our house backed to fields thus we had lots of field mice in our house. When my sister and I would play on the floor, the mice would be running around the edges of the living room. When my Mom would open cupboards and sometimes they would be just they would sitting there. When I opened my drawers, they would be in them and at time jump out because I startled them but it was like they were jumping at me.  

So I am very scared of them even after all these years. Logic doesn’t seem to play into it as I know I am bigger them. But even as typing this and thinking of them I shivered. It doesn’t matter that I am bigger then them. It doesn’t matter that they are probably “more” scared of me then I am of them (I doubt that they are though). I know they are teeny tiny. I don’t like them. I am scared of them. It is irrational that I still have this fear after all these years.

In January 2005, we (Michael, our cats, and I - cats were at Michael’s parents while we traveled elsewhere) came home from being on vacation. The cats found mice. Here is a fairly humourous account of it that I can read and laugh but I know that if I found a mouse here right now in the house I would be screaming and diving for the first available place to get off my body and feet off the floor.  

Mouse in Our House - written January 7, 2005

We have 2 cats so really I never worried about mice here, but felt since where we live that chances of mice is probable because we are out next to some fields. Well my carefreeness because of the cats, has been thrown out the window today.

Right before we left for vacation our little girl cat Chessie became obsessed with a few points in the kitchen especially in front of the stove/oven. She would sit,look, sniff and try to get under it for hours. Well, I did not think much about it as she has gotten lots of toys under there before. But the thing is now that I think about it she never has been this obsessed about it when a toy got under there. So that should have been my first clue.

We get back from vacation and the cats immediately act weird in the bedroom. Such as stalking or hunting but there was nothing (as in toys) in there to stalk or hunt at the moment. I just thought they lost a toys somewhere that I had not seen in there.

The last few days it has been near the fridge and especially the pantry door. I would open the pantry door and both cats would be right inside sniffing around. And our girl cat even climbed on things on the pantry floor. (We store cases of diet coke, toilet paper, packages of bottled water, mulit-packs of kleenex). Our cats never climb on things in there. It is like they know that is not something they should do. But every time I have opened the door the last few days they are there climbing and nosing at things. So today they were acting weird around the door again - being obsessed about it. I busy cleaning and I said okay go for it. I opened the door and I went to clean the bedroom. I can see the pantry from the bedroom so I heard them both in there. And girl cat was meowing. I went and moved something she was pawing at and set it in the kitchen but went back to the bedroom. It left little room for the hiding mouse now. I heard Chessie really scrambling and I turn around to tell them okay that is enough. I step into the kitchen and that is when I see it—running from the pantry into the kitchen. It is heading towards the stove.

I SCREAM! I keep screaming! And I scare our boy cat, Caesar. His tail got huge. And he was freaked from me screaming - not from the mouse. I jumped on the bed grabbed the phone and called Michael. The boy cat went to look but then came back to look at me still pretty much screaming and now crying which freaked him out more. Yes, I know it is a little mouse.

Michael had only been at work maybe 40 minutes if that. I punch in his extension. He answers and all I can do is cry out, “REAL MOUSE REAL MOUSE!” I am not sure how many times I said it but I know it was at least two.

He says, “Okay honey take a deep breath calm down.”

I said, “real mouse real mouse,” quieter this time.

He said, “where is it?”

I said, “in the kitchen I think under the stove.”

He said, “What did the cats do?”

I told him that I scared Caeser and that Chessie did not get that the mouse was not in the pantry anymore so she was in there still.

He said, “Okay I am on my way home.”

I know he was ready to try to reason with me more but I was crying and sobbing. And well frankly out of control. But he tried just a little.

He said, “you do know that you probably scared the mouse?”

I cried, “yes.” But I kept on crying.

His co-workers know that I have a fear of them as they have them at the office and I have seen one there. I did not freak out like I did at home, but I got a little shaken there. So he went to tell his immediate boss that his girl was crying and screaming and scared because she saw a mouse in the house. A REAL mouse.

When I moved in with Michael, I took all the cat toys that looked like real mice and put them in a box. Because even the fake mice that looked like real ones scared me. Now all the cat toys that are mouse shaped are in bright colors - hot pink, lime green, purple and orange. So that is why I was screaming real mouse so that he knew I wasn’t freaked out from a fake mouse that looked like a mouse because when I first moved in I did jump a few times seeing a couple of the cat toys that looked real.

So I stayed on the bed holding the phone until Michael came home. He was laughing, but at the same time very understanding of my irrational over the top fear.

He moved things and tried to find the mouse, but he couldn’t. But he did discover where it is probably living or the path that it keeps to...so he went and got some traps and put them in places along the path. It is my hope we get it soon and then we can look for how it got in - in the first place.

Also when he got home I had not taken my shower yet but was scared to go in there. He had to scope things out for me before I went to take my shower. He then got my slippers checked to make sure mice were not in them. I knew I needed to have my feet covered as I would totally freak out if the mouse ran over my bare feet. So I have been in my slippers all day.

The whole day when I have had to move towards the kitchen I would make LOTS Of noise so that it would stay hidden from me. I know it is stupid that I have this fear all these years later but I hope that the little story might give someone a good laugh. I know it gave Michael and his co-workers had a laugh. And I know one day I will laugh at it even though my fear probably won’t be going away anytime soon - now.