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My finances are getting low with my home not sold so I was going to turn to my 401K as a last resort.  I worked hard to start that savings and invested 20K of my own working money.  It was at 30K and I figured I would take the 50% loss and take 15K to survive another year if I need to if the home isn’t sold by January.

I made the dreaded call to see what my funds went down to and they are now at 8K!!!  Good thing I am on antidepressants or else I would have had a mini breakdown.  

I have no place to pull from.  No credit cards.  They are stopped until the house is sold and then will be paid off.

I receive 663.50 a month from my ex to live on.  My monthly expenses are as follows:

car lease: 332.00
health insurance: 475.00
drug costs: 150.00 (would be 1500 without insurance)
therapist: 40.00
car insurance: 120.00
rent: 500.00

I had some extra money initially; but that is almost gone.
I am applying for disability;  because I can’t work at this point.  

I have borrowed from my Mom.  She has the money; but my father is very conservative about her taking it out.  I can pay her back once my home is sold.

Does anyone have any suggestions on what to do.  I thought of borrowing against the home; but I don’t think I can do that with the legal agreement in place.  My ex lives there and pays the bills for it as per our agreement until it is sold.

Any ideas would be helpful.



Member Comments

    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Mary Clark wrote Oct 21, 2008
    • Diane...

      Annie is right.  You need to get in touch with her...she just might can help you.  

      I will definitely say a prayer for you and for your house to sell.  

      I too hope things turn around for you.  


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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Shopgirl1960 wrote Oct 21, 2008
    • Dianne,

      Is there any way you could ask the person you rent from to let you pay the next month or months in 1 lump sum WITH interest. It isn’t likely,but you can try.

      Does your boyfriend live with you?

      Also, there has to be some kind of lenders out there who can help you, even if the interest rate is high. Isn’t there a place called “pay day lenders” or something like that? I had a client who was always using them. Nearly every month.

      I have heard that getting disability is next to impossible, or could take a year or more. Have you heard differently?

      Another avenue.  In Indiana they have housing- apartments and houses, that are cheaper. Maybe your state does too.

      I will pray for you Dianne! He has pulled me out of some pretty scary situations raising two babies alone.  I think that is why I have such faith in him!


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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Shopgirl1960 wrote Oct 21, 2008
    • Dianne,

      Have you ever had a thyroid test? If so how many times?
      I know I have mentioned it on here somewhere... but just to make sure you know that 99% of those with thyroid problems goes undetected. Lordy be I wish I were a magician to make you well!

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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Mary Clark wrote Oct 21, 2008
    • Della...

      Not trying to step on your toes....and you are trying to help Dianne...but please let me give one piece of advice to everyone.  

      Please do not use any “pay day lenders“.  These people feed off of people who are already struggling and eventually they get so far in debt with them...there is no way out.  I work in a financial institution and I see what it does to people...EVERYDAY.  They are addicting...and it’s like getting on a merry go round but you can never get off.
      Your client probably uses them every month because she is stuck with them now.  

      The way they work down in my area is...they have to bring in a bank statement (30days)...and a check to the payday lender.  They borrow $300 but the check is written for $345.00.  The lender gives them a check off of their (the lender’s acct.) account for $300.00.  The borrower brings the check in...either deposits it or cashes it. about two weeks...they get paid.  The payday lender comes into the branch...with their check...and cashes it out.  Okay..the $345 is deducted from the borrowers acct.  Well...gosh...I just got money is gone..I don’t have enough to make it the next two best go back to the payday lender.  They go back..with another bank statement...another check...made out for $345.  They cut the borrower another check for $300.  Then it happens all over again. that one month...that payday lender has made $90 off of you could have used for another bill, groceries, gas...medicine..etc.
      The lending got you no where.  

      Again...not trying to step on anyone’s toes...but I absolutely cannot stand payday lenders.  They ruin people’s lives.  And if anyone that is a member of FAB40 and works for one...I’m sorry. I know it’s your job but that is how I feel about them.  

      The cheaper housing that Della was speaking of...sounds like a plan as well.
      Disability is very hard to get....99% of the need a lawyer to help you.  

      Dianne...I really hate you are struggling.  Wish you lived around here...I could get you help.

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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Dee Dee Shaw wrote Oct 21, 2008
    • Dianne,
      Dave Ramsey has a good system to help you get out of debt too. It looks like your major expenses are your car and your insurance. Could you get out of the lease and buy an inexpensive used car? It would decrease your car insurance too. Our family has no health insurance (except hubby who is covered by his employer.) It came down to choosing between our supplements which help us stay well, or insurance. Our budget wouldn’t allow for both. We might have to pay some out of pocket if we need to go to ER, but it is still cheaper than paying monthly premiums. I will pray for you that the house sells soon!

      Sharing Hope,
      Dee Dee

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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Mary Clark wrote Oct 21, 2008
    • Happymomma...I was thinking the same thing on the car lease and car insurance.  Only thing is...if she is not working right might be hard for her to get a loan to buy a smaller inexpensive car.  And with the loan situation going on now too.  

      But where I work..we do have a car loan promotion going on right now.  We are lending money...yeah!!!

      The low rent housing.....look into that.  Gosh if you lived where I live I could get you something so much cheaper and nice.

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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Dianne67 wrote Oct 22, 2008
    • To answer some questions:

      The car lease is up in March.  Here is the deal with it though.  I leased it with the ability to put 20k miles on a year.  We extended the lease last March so if I am to turn it in I can have 80K miles on it; so that is what they are using to come up with the pay off amount if I want to buy it, like I planned.  I only have 25K miles on the car.  I would want to keep it for many more years and just pay for it.  It is in great condition.  I hope by then the house will be sold so I can do so.    

      As far as getting well from the fibromyalgia; that is more of a longer term option.  I need a quick fix now.

      Once my home is sold; I will have a comfortable amount of money.  A lot is riding on the home.  

      As far as disability; I have never tried for it and instead financially suffered for 3 years waiting to get better.  I have paid into it working since I was 16; but even aso I feel weird asking for a hand out.  I truly am too ill to work and I am going to give getting it a try.  The stress of not having money issues will also help my stress which will in turn help my health.

      I tried to work for my boyfriend last year during tax season and after a few hours of work; I would be bed bound for 5 days minimum.  I help him out every now and then now and it kills me.  The one thing I always struggle to do is cook dinner.  It has always been my passion so I really push to do it.  

      I am in therapy to cope with living with pain.  I was not molested or abused as a child to cause my illness.  I did have a car accident that injured me.  I did live in a toxic home with parents that constantly worried and my father was extremely, and still is, negative.  They would fight all the time.  I lived in fear of everything.  When I started driving my father was afraid that if I got in a car accident that he would lose the house because they would take everything.  I had the fear that someone would break in through my bedroom window and steal me.  I lived very insecure growing up; plus I was extremely shy.  I have dealt with that since.  I do think I hold in a lot of stress because my muscles are always in a tightened state and have been for years.

      As far as boyfriend lives with me and pays half the rent.  We need the space for my stuff which is taking up one bedroom.  I still have a house full of more things; since I went down in living space.  We are also committed to the lease.    

      My family lives 3 hours from me and I can’t go back to them because they are too toxic and it is not healthy for me.  I also am in PA starting a new life which has been healthy for me all around.  I am not about to leave the only healthy person for me.  My boyfriend is always there for me and supportive.      

      I live very cheap now.  No tv or internet except my ex had wireless hooked in our other home and I was getting it free for a while in my apartment.  Now the sites are all secured so to go online I have to come to my boyfriend’s office.  He does taxes.  That is why I am not on this site as often.
      I don’t have a land line phone.  We eat in most of the time. My cell phone is still paid by my ex.

      I am selling stuff I have and someone on this site is buying some stuff from me which will help a lot.  God Bless her.  

      I am selling whatever I can because I want a simpler life anyway.

      I am not willing to sacrifice my health insurance because that is a necessity.  I see doctors that I only have a $20 co-pay for and my scripts are outrageous without a plan.  I can’t take chances since my health is never certain.  I have been checked for everything extensively with bloodwork.  Even other remote auto-immune diseases.    Family members have had the same conditions that I have so there seems to be a connection.    

      The bottom line is that by January I will need more money.  Hopefully, only temporarily.  As I have said, the money is tied up in the house so I just need help now.  Once it is sold my whole world changes.  It is either feast or famine with me usually.

      If any of you need anything, check out what I have listed so far on my link of items for sale.  You can also negotiate the prices even though they are pretty well priced.  The cookware makes great gifts.  I will list more stuff also.  No obligation; but if you need it please buy from me.

      I also have made cute night lights with crystals that I need to photograph.  When I have given people them they have loved them.

      Thank you everyone.


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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Dianne67 wrote Oct 22, 2008
    • It is a group I started:

      Stuff to trade or purchase from each other

      I will add more stuff soon.


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