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How many times have you decided to write a blog, work up a couple of sentences only to delete it and change your mind?  When you do this, is the reason you decided against the blog the same?  Mine usually is.

These days, i will begin writing and something will make me ask myself why i think anyone cares what i have to say.  This comes from lack of confidence.  It’s strange because in “real life” i am a pretty confident woman.  I am fortunate to have my health, my family, many friends, a job i really enjoy, and no pressing worries.  How does confidence translate to the Internet without sounding pretentious (or arrogant)?  In real life (IRL) i have my past to support my confidence.  I have the benefit of having earned the respect of my family, friends, and community to support my belief that i’m own personal history, if you will.

Online, i am at the mercy of thousands (millions) of people who do not know me, who do not get my sense of humor, who do not care that I am a pretty decent individual with no agenda.  I have been hurt plenty of times by people with whom i have never looked in the eye.  As a result, i think i have become jaded.  I am slow to trust, slow to share personal information/feelings.  I have learned that the perceived anonymity of the Internet comes with it’s own price.

A person could be MORE obnoxious IRL than she appears online or she could be someone with no voice IRL who uses the Internet to be “heard“.  She could be a high-powered individual IRL who puts on a good face for the world but, when inside she is a complete mess about her life so she comes to an online community to commiserate.

I guess my point is this:  sometimes, what you read isn’t an accurate representation of who the person really is.  I’m not referring to those individuals who intentionally portray themselves to be someone they are not...i am referring to those who are trying to present an accurate view of themselves without the benefit of their reputation in the community where they are posting.  

The broad spectrum of life simply cannot translate into the computer.


Member Comments

    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Vikki Hall wrote Dec 5, 2008
    • You are right! Especially if you‘re not an accomplished writer who is good at putting thoughts to paper or internet. Those who ‘know’ me ‘get’ me even if I’m not clear. There is something to be said about the use of facial expressions and/or hand gestures that get lost in the translation on the internet.
      In the meantime I will continue practicing my hunt n peck typing skills......

            Report  Reply

    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Mz. Queen wrote Dec 5, 2008
    • Dear Daphne,

        I am not sure what the message is but keep writing, someone will feel, appreciate or even need to hear what you are sharing.

      much love

            Report  Reply

    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Coachmombabe wrote Dec 5, 2008
    • I totally get what you are saying, Daphne. There are many times I don’t blog, or even comment, because my words cannot be fully taken in through the filter of others truly knowing who I am.  I tend to only post what I feel can be accurately portrayed. I also have the thought, is this something that others would really want/need to know?

      I guess I’ll keep working on it. Thanks!

            Report  Reply

    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Yana Berlin wrote Dec 5, 2008
    • Great topic and so true.

      When we launched Fab40 we did several focus groups and found out that many women in our demographic do not write period....when asked why they said they didn’t want to be judge on their writing skills.  (that was 3 years ago, things changed, but not drastically)

      It’s sad that there are many among us who are quick to judge, quick to label, and make people uncomfortable.  I remember during the Election Drama and the posts, many had a lot to say but stayed away because some people have this great ability to write to come out and say what they want to say and even if one doesn’t agree with them they feel insecure arguing.

      Well, Ladies, this is Fab40 and we didn’t get this far by being meek. Who cares if we write well, if our grammar is up to par, if you got something to say, SAY IT.

      My grammar needs much improvement, I swallow words, and when I proof read I read what’s not there, and you know what I found out???so as many other people out there.

      If someone doesn’t like what you have to say they will not come back to read it, and that’s okay, however, there are plenty of us that will.

      So if you start a blog today and don’t finish, come back to it tomorrow, and watch your writing flow....

      WE HAVE A VOICE now let it be heard.estatic

            Report  Reply

    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Robinesque wrote Dec 5, 2008
    • Daphne, why wouldn’t you write?  You couldn’t have been more clear. I completely agree.  Perfectly said.

            Report  Reply

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