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My husband and I had an interesting conversation tonight.  We were discussing what the year held in the way of entertainment.  Lately, we’ve been discussing vacation options, anniversary celebration options, boating trips, etc.  We sometimes like to do things with other couples and friends.

I asked him, “Who is your best friend?”  He said he didn’t have a best friend.  I asked “Who is your closest friend?”  He said he didn’t have ONE of those.  I asked him if he thought we just outgrow best friends and he said he did.  He said that as he grew older and he and his friends had other demands on their time and attention, he lost the need to assign the designation of “best” to any of his friends.  

I have to admit, i have several people who i consider very good friends and i even refer to some of them as “best” or “BFF” but if any were truly the “BEST“, i wouldn’t be able to do that.  So, i guess the guy has a point!

What do you think?  As we “grow up” do we lose the need to rank our friends?



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Member Comments

    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Cindylouwho1966 wrote Jan 23, 2009
    • Hmmm, interesting question. I still call my friend from age 9 BFF, because she has been through the most with me. I use the term “best” for my three GFs in Indy and my GF in Chicago.

      Mark has tons of people who admire the hell out of him, but he has no best buddies. Luckily, I do not feel I am his only social source.



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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Holdonloosely wrote Jan 23, 2009
    • I have to say, my husband and my daughter are my best friends. I outgrew some friends and others are not with us anymore.



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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Vikki Hall wrote Jan 23, 2009
    • I don’t have any real BFF’s but I have many good friends I could go to at any point in my life. I think based on demands, location, jobs and kids you just sometimes lose touch. Unless of course you are in the same town where you grew up, work and kids go to school with your BFF. That may be a different story....



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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Feathermaye wrote Jan 23, 2009
    • I have a “longest” friend, since we were 14. We email/talk on the phone regularly and see each other a couple of times a year (she’s in San Antonio and I’m in Houston).

      Recently, someone I considered to be a close friend totally ditched me with no explanation. I say she outgrew me; my husband says she finally figured out that I outgrew her years ago, lol.



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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Jenni0811 wrote Jan 23, 2009
    • I agree....I used to have a small closed circle of BFF’s...those have faded and been replaced by many more friends whom I feel I can call on equally but none ranks above the other....all different...all equally important to me...

      that’s where I’m at...



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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Cheryl Guy wrote Jan 23, 2009
    • I do have a “best” friend & she will be my best friend for life! She is more than just a friend to me, she is just as much family to me as my blood relatives. We have known each other since Kindergarten & my life would suck without her! Many friends have come and gone but she is in my heart & soul forever.



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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Linni wrote Jan 23, 2009
    • i have a BFF back home.. we went to school together, and she is a wonderful friend, and i really consider her more like a sister than anything..

      alot of my friends are more family to me. i cherrish each and every friendship i have



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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Owlmaria wrote Jan 23, 2009
    • I don’t have any real Best Friends, anymore. My husband is my soul-mate & I don’t know about my sons being my friends. They are my family- totally different emotions come into play.



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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Linda Hendricks wrote Jan 24, 2009
    • I agree with your husband and a few others here that said the same thing... your life just takes different turns and the demands on your time and energy are just spent elsewhere.... I will say that.. I have a few really good friends that no matter what ... any time day or night... I can call if I need to... we pick up the phone and catch up or go to lunch and it was like time never passed.

      I think it’s one of those rites of passage we all will at one point or another go through...  

      My Mother has a friend considerably older than she is... I call her aunt... my mom is 75...the friend is 96 and healthy... but she moves more slowly now... which is understandable... she still communicates with friends... but infrequently... her day is made up of other priorities... my mother understands and feels no less about her... but the reality is... priorities change all through life.



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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Denise Richardson wrote Jan 24, 2009
    • In my opinion Daphane, that sounds about right for me. I don’t have any best friends or close friends I have several associates thats about it. I would like to say though that my hubby and my 2 daughters are is my best friends. We talk about everything together.



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