My husband & I were walking in the city on Saturday night after a pleasant evening at an Italian restaurant. We were on our way to a lounge a few blocks down, when we noticed a club overflowing with people outside. Tons of people in line, tons in the parking lot, and tons upstairs on the balcony.

Yet this was not just a regular party. What caught my eye was that the girls were young- very young. 14, 15, 16.

I was in complete shock when I saw how these teens were dressed. I have no problem with a dress, or even a short skirt, but these girls, who were very young of course, were wearing close to nothing. Chests were bare, and mini skirts were cut off at their butts. They had no limit to the amount (lack of) clothing they were wearing.  

Police were everywhere, I’d say about 8-10 cars, trying to contain these teens, as they were screeming, dancing, and waiting anxiously to get into the club.

I asked an officer what was going on, thinking, sure many kids have fake ids, but these girls were not even close to looking 16, let alone going to  a 21 year old club.

The officer explained that there was an event going on for kids under 21, hence the excitement and dressing up, thinking they looked older.

I understand that these kids were excited to have the opportunity to be at a club with all their friends, but I was just shocked to see the behavior of such young teens.

Without asking, the officer informed me that there was no alcohol whatsoever at this event. Yet, there where select girls in their “cool” attire who were stumbling around the parking lot slurring their words. The cops were in the front of the crowd, so these kids were lucky to get away with being drunk.

I am not a nosy mother, nor am I a nosy person, but I was just so upset seeing these young kids drinking. Its events like these that make me proud of the fact that my kids are not afraid to tell me when they have been drinking at a party, or what is going on in their lives. Not to say that it is okay that my teens drank at parties in high school, but protecting them from reality, would only make them rebel twice as bad when they went away to college.   I was thrilled that my kids knew that when they drank, if there was not a sober driver, no matter the hour, no matter if they only had 1 beer, they could call my husband or me. Yet during this event last night, the kids were so young it was beyond me, to see them drinking, and smoking. That just goes to show that parents need to begin building strong relationships with their kids.

To many times i have witnessed a mother thinking that she is doing her daughter a favor, by not letting her go out, which admitadly, creates tension for the mother daughter relationship, because of the “no” we have to shed to our child.  This leads to secrets being withheld from us.

I am also not saying that it is always okay to say yes. There are boundaries, circumstances, and trust issues at hand, but what I am trying to highlight, is the importance of creating a special bond with your child, in which they are happy to share the latest news of their life with you.

My kids respect themselves, and respect others, because they have learned the difference between what they can handle and what is too much, what is wrong, and what is right.  

If we can’t beat the enemy (society pushing young kids to mature), join them. That’s right- bring up these issues with your kids. Its either you—or they will learn from the kids at school.

Who would you rather it be?