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As far back as I can remember in real life, TV sit coms..The general attitude was ...Every man wanted a Son..Someone to carry on the family name..To teach Hunting, Fishing, Camping, and an all around pal..Buy them those Lionel Train sets, Play Football in school, Be the Basketball Star..Work on Hot Rods... Back in those days a man who did not produce a son..Or..had a string of Girls..Was thought to be.. "Not Manly Enough" must be something wrong with his plumbing...This was a serious issue..The other side of this is.. The Woman's view..They all wanted those baby girls..Everything "Pink & Lacy"..Cute Dresses,  Braids, and Baby Dolls. Tea Parties. Teaching them, Cooking, Baking, How to run a Household, Manage on a budget..To teach them Virtues, Social Skills, and most importantly..How To Treat Their Men. How to Tow the Line and be an "Obedient Wife". School was something a woman completed to make her that well rounded, educated, Wife..A Career minded woman was someone most other women admired secretly.. Having said all this to create a back drop for this Blog...  

The "BIG DAY" November 7th 1958 out pops ME!...My parents were so happy...In spite of the whole Male hype over Men have Boys..My Dad had that covered, He had two sons from his first marriage..But...He still wanted someone to pal around with and teach...I think I was about 5 years old when I got my first "Train set"... I loved it..Dad taught Me!! all the necessary man stuff... I learned to shoot a shot gun and a rifle..All the cleaning procedures (which I did not get to do till I bought my own hand gun as an adult)..I shot rabbits and squirrels; I could skin um and cook um... I had my own very awesome Fishing pole and tackle box..He taught me all the things I need to know about Fishing...learned to work on my own car..Change the oil, clean the carburetor, change a tire, check all my fluids, flush my radiator...I was a total Tom Boy...This broke my Mothers heart a bit..  She would buy me Barbie's..I had the cool doll case to hang all her dresses in and all the tiny accessories..He bought me GI Joe dolls..I had lots of accessories, Jeeps, weapons, clothes. She bought me frilly dresses He bought me jeans and sneakers..You get the idea..I had the best of both worlds...

My Dad and I got along better than Mom and me..I was Daddy's lil girl..We went everywhere together..Mom just fussed and complained about me not acting all frilly and girlie..I was always climbing trees, playing baseball, got a couple black eyes playing football..LOL..I could fight and hold my own Boy or Girl..
But...Two days before my 18th Birthday he was walking across a main street going to pick up a pizza and was hit by a car..He was in a coma for 5 days..He never regained conciseness and I never got to say good bye and to tell him how much I loved him (this is so hard for me to write)..I still cry a lot...and I miss him every day. Mom decided to take him off life support..And just like that.. He was gone. My Hero..My Best Friend..My Daddy..I was in a state of shock and denial..I didn't allow myself to morn him. It took me 3 yrs to be able to go to his grave..I just couldn't do it..The day I finally went I just sat there and cried...

Daddy another Birthday, Thanksgiving, and Christmas to..Without your warm loving smile and Jolly way... Nothing means the same to me since the day you were taken away..So many things you missed , walking me down the aisle, the Daddy Daughter dance at my wedding..You never got to see my babies..You would have taught them well..You would have been their Hero too.. I miss You and Love You Daddy...



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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Rena Bennefield wrote Oct 31, 2008
    • NYCMOM..For me it will never go away..I am not close to my Mom..so I feel for the most part time like both parents are gone..Thanks for commenting..I also am sorry for your loss as well..It just does not feel fair...(((HUG))) Kat



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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Rena Bennefield wrote Oct 31, 2008
    • AWWW NYCMOM..Don't feel that way..I am so happy for you that you were able to share your life with him so many years..I know your sad and my heart goes out to you..My dad loved flowers so I talked to my B/F Jerry and next spring I am making a small rock garden with a little fountain in it and plant his favorite flowers there and a big pot of Forget me not's.. I make these picture frames that are weather proof for like grave site decorations..And I will make one for his garden of him and me as a child..in his memory.. Do you ever dream about him? I do sometimes and it feels so strange when I wake up like I got to visit with him..I even talk to him about my life now..and he seems to know about it..It's probably just my over stimulated imagination LOL... Take Care...(((HUG))) P.s. You can make really nice indoor memorial gardens..I will post them soon on my craft group blog kk..It wouuld be a nice tribute to your Dad..



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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Rena Bennefield wrote Oct 31, 2008
    • Yeah it was like that for me also..When I was about 10 I used to go roller skating every Fri. and Sat. night..Well in my dream I a skating but (I was grown a in the dream) and I look over and my Dad was standing on the side line waving at me..I go over and speak to him..I hugged him and kissed his cheek..He said how are you Snoopy (my nick name from him) I was like Dad I miss you and wish you would come home..He hugged me up and kissed my cheek..I had to go skate for some reason and asked him to wait..When I turned around he had gone..I felt sad but at peace and happy inside..I will post the gardens soon..I'll get the pictures together..Thanks for sharing =)



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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Michelle Rowe wrote Nov 3, 2008
    • Kat-I lost my dad two weeks before my wedding. We were so close. We worked together, we had the same sense of humor. My mom died 4 months later. I was very close with them both. I never go visit their graves as I don’t feel that they are there. I feel they are with me always. I remember one day being particularly sad about them. I was driving and crying. I had my sunroof open and I experienced the strangest sensation. It felt like my face was being held by two hands through the opening in my sunroof. I truly believe it was them trying to comfort me. There is no other way to describe it.



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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Rena Bennefield wrote Nov 4, 2008
    • Vigurl..  I am sooo sorry for you..That had to be so hard....I to believe my Dad is still with me..When I cry I feel his comforting hugs..or I can hear him call me just in a whisper..I believe it was one of them comforting you..I know that the Bible says to be absent from this earth is to be present with the Lord..And maybe it is just that I can't let go..All I know is I want to keep him as close to my heart as I can..



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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Jean Walter wrote Nov 4, 2008
    • There is nothing more special then the bond of a little girl and her daddy...
      I lost my dad when I was 29 ( he was only 63 ) from a massive heart attack (only 3 months after having quadruple bypass surgery) I was in shock for so long... I just couldn’t accept that he was gone... I was lucky enough to have visited with him the night before and the last thing he said to me was ” I hope you know how much I love you “... I will always cherish that I was able to tell him that I too loved him... this doesn’t make it easier to accept the fact that he is gone...
      Like your dad, Kat, I was always learning something new from him. I was the first girl after 4 older brothers and my father was my role model... I wanted to learn so much from him... i was always asking questions and he always had the perfect answer... my daddy was my hero... he too taught me how to bait a worm on a hook.... camp under the stars and make the perfect fire.. he made sure I knew how to check the oil in my car and to always always have a positive attitude about life... His favorite motto was “If you can’t change something, don’t spend a minute worrying over it” in the end nothing has changed and you will never get back that precious time that you have wasted fretting over something that hasn’t changed... such a wise man and I miss him terribly every day of my life... even with it being 17 years later...
      When I first joined this site, I jumped in feet first and exposed myself to a lot of criticism concerning my EX and how I often thought of him, even though I am remarried for 11 years...but the thing that you don’t know is that my EX went with one of my brothers to the hospital after my father’s heart attack and he was there when they pronounced him dead and he was there to comfort me and hold me in his arms when I felt like my whole world was coming to an end... these are memories that you don’t forget...these are feelings that will never go away... this connection is what binds us and I will always be thankful for that...
      Losing a parent at any age, under any circumstance is never easy.. but to have someone be there for you and help you get through it... well, it doesn’t make it easier but it gives us strength and hope for tomorrow...



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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Rena Bennefield wrote Nov 8, 2008
    • AWWWW Jeanie... That was so touching..I have tears in my eyes..Thank You for shareing...I know exactly how you feel...and my heart goes out to you.. Yes my Daddy is still my hero...and he always will be... (((HUG)))  =)



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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Jean Walter wrote Nov 8, 2008
    • {{{HUGS}}} Back to you...Kat!!



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