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No, I'm not talking about that. I'm talking about a man's height.

Specifically, how tall or short is your man? And does his height have any bearing on his personality?

My father is of medium height. Both of my grandpas were of medium height, and so is my uncle. I love them all dearly, and their height has never been an issue with me. But when it came time to choose a man of my own, medium was not what I wanted. Call me shallow or vain. But in my little head, a tall man represented power, balance and stability.

I was so locked into tall that I refused to date short guys, no matter how good looking or how nice their personality. The one time I went against my rule and dated a short guy, it didn't last very long. I remember catching a glimpse of my short boyfriend as we passed by a storefront window. Seeing myself a bit taller caused a knot in my stomach and made me want to escape. I broke it off with him the very next day.  

Yes, that's how shallow I was.  And to make the matters worse, he was a very nice guy, the kind you are happy to take home and meet your parents. These days, when my daughter is madly in love with a guy who barely stands an inch taller than her, I look at both of them and smile. My daughter is so much smarter than I was.

Personality Trumps Tall

We women tend to wrap ourselves in the vanity of short, skinny, tall, fat—all of the qualities that we stop noticing when life happens. As soon as the "I do's" are over and life begins, no one really cares about these things. We either learn to overlook the imperfections in the spouse that we adore, or, if it turns out that we are not meant for each other and that love was a temporary thing, we tend to obsess about their imperfections.

We've all heard about short men with Napoleon complexes. And we've all met the six-feet and taller men who are more insecure than a 15-year old boy with a face full of acne. The truth is that size doesn't really matter. It's all about personality.  

My grandma always said that a handsome man is just a bit more attractive than a monkey (but just by a tiny bit, she would add with a twinkle in her eye).  

A short man with a great personality has just as many (if not more) chances of getting that hot girl or classy woman as a tall handsome dude. In fact, the short guy will get noticed for a great sense of humor and gregariousness much faster than the tall handsome guy. Why? Simply because he is trying so much harder and it melts our hearts.

So now, at age 43, I finally get it.  And I apologize profusely to all the wonderful men that never had a chance with me when I was single and dating.

All the best,


Member Comments

    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      JoAnn Donahue wrote Jul 31, 2008
    • I have to agree with you Yana..  

      I truly mean that from my heart..

      The personality is what matters most of all..

      However if I am just looking around..

      Oh as I sometimes do..

      Being married 28 years I still find

      the time to do a little surveying of the land...

      now and then.. (wink) It makes me feel

      alive at times, young at others and just down right

      appreciative of the beauty that surrounds us!!

      I have to admit  however that the “Tall” guys get my attention first..

      Now if the “shorter” guy approached me and his personality

      was friendly and funny and sincere...

      then his height would not even be thought about..

      Fun discussion.  I like your grand mother.. happy

            Report  Reply

    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Mary Kelly-Williams, M.A. wrote Jul 31, 2008
    • Growing up, I would always say I was going to marry a man who was tall, dark and handsome.  I did.  My former husband was 6‘1, good looking with dark hair.

      In my early 40’s, after my divorce, I met my soul mate man.  It took me a long time to be attracted to him. He’s 5‘10 with auburn curly hair.  Just not “my type“.

      After about 6 months of getting to know him, I thought he was the most handsome man on the planet (and still do).  

      I’m 5‘8, so I realized that I enjoy pretty much standing eye to eye with him, and when I’m feeling sassie, I wear my 4” inch heels.

      Because he is a man who is secure with himself, this never bothers him.

      Yum Yum...


            Report  Reply

    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Shiguzman wrote Jul 31, 2008
    • I agree with you but, the problem seems to be that short height men feel bad about themselves so, after a while they become awful!!

            Report  Reply

    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Alexandra Popovic wrote Jul 31, 2008
    • This topic really hit home for me!  

      I’m 6‘2” and always had issues with my height. It wasn’t until my mid-20’s I began to get comfy in my own skin HOWEVER that wasn’t the case with the opp. sex.  The height thing was always an issue/obstacle - maybe it’s the stereotype that a man is supposed to be taller (mind you, it didn’t seem to bother Tom Cruise and Nicole initially!).  

      Anyhoo, it boiled down to the simple fact that I just wasn’t comfortable around a shorter man, feeling very self-conscious etc.  It all turned out well in the end though, I’ve been married to a man 2cms taller than me for almost 10 years, and get this...5 years younger! ;)

            Report  Reply

    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      RUTHIE BROWN wrote Aug 8, 2008
    • I like me that are taller then me,But If a man is my size,(5‘2)and he is secure with himself and we clik then I would not have a problem with it..Most men are not confident with themselves if they are short..

            Report  Reply

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