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Ever play dominoes? I used to when I was around 10. I didn't actually "play"-just liked to line them up in a design and watch them fall. But it is a great lesson for today's world.

Like watching the tiles fall, once things in life start to change there's no stopping things on that line either.

In the last couple of years we've watched the economy fall. We've seen the fall out from that in things like people losing jobs, health care, homes, dignity and self-esteem-which is quite different than dignity.  

At least in dominoes, once you've watched everything "go down"-you feel a little as if you've witnessed a little bit of engineering artwork happen. Not so with the world around us.  

I remember being "crazy busy" (if I may borrow from one of my recent interviewees, Debbie Mandel) a couple of years back-working a "day job", trying to get my free-lancing to pay me and get more avenues of publication, being a full time wife, mother and becoming a grandmother and suddenly screaming, if only in my head, STOP, I NEED TO STOP!!!

Then I got my wish-talk about being hit in the face with ice water. It was just like watching the dominoes! Just not very pretty.

At first, I didn't mind the "cold" or the falling-I saw my employers crying and thought, why? I liked my co-workers, liked having a purposeful thing to do everyday, liked having a reliable paycheck, but upset? No, not really.

Then the "tiles" started really moving-had to get unemployment, had to get my pitiful retirement fund money rolled over to an IRA, had to sit down and work out a new budget, had to stop thinking that we could continue to help others out in monetary ways. If we wanted to put something aside for our own retirement, we were going to have some mighty big refiguring and sacrificing to do.

My first thought was-"I know what's happening out there, given all the dynamics, I bet I won't find a new day job for 6 months or so."

What was I thinking? 6 months turned into 18. Unemployment is now on the 3rd extension and I'm in a cyber-support group for unemployed 50+ year olds. Except now my support includes a couple of early "30's", a couple "40's" and some 60 year olds.

I have been able to increase my free lancing, but it sure hasn't helped beef up our bank account. It's so little, no one even sends out tax forms! In fact, when I lost my camera last month-that pretty much took my profits into the red.

I'd laugh, but it isn't funny. Thankfully, we had an older (read this heavier and less useful) digital camera that we kept-I'll be using that when I need to take pictures for a column I write.

In dominoes, once all the pieces fall you can pick them up, make a new design and start the process of watching what will now come next happen.

With life-it isn't near as neat or fast.

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Member Comments

    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Max0125 wrote Mar 12, 2010
    • Great blog! I have been talking to a lot of people lately regarding career change. It seems to me that there are two distinct groups. The first group has been forced to recreate their lives via layoffs. The second group have “secure” jobs now but are not passionate in their jobs. Too bad we can’t “reshuffle” the dominos to get a better hand. What I think is interesting is that more people are seeking jobs that feed their passion, rather than seek jobs that are a safe “secure“.

      What I admire about you is that you are doing the very thing that you love- writing. I always look forward to reading your work. Keep it up!



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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Carine Nadel wrote Mar 12, 2010
    • Thank you!  What feels great is when I hear/read comments like yours. I actually had a “fan” letter from someone who got hooked on my blog and articles on MORE.com and told me I inspired her to start writing!



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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Max0125 wrote Mar 12, 2010
    • You have inspired me to write again! Have you ever considered becoming a writing coach or blog editor? You would be awesome at it!

      How is your book coming?



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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Carine Nadel wrote Mar 12, 2010
    • I would, but I have no idea how to get into something like that.
      On the subject of my book-w/ the “hand” thing going on, I’ve had to put it aside for the moment. I have to use what strength is in it to write up the few paying pieces I do. I have about 6 a month, plus my freebies (my blog and the what’s cooking here).
      I’m in occupational and physical therapy for it though and do my exercises religiously.  So I’m hoping that by the time my son’s wedding and my trip w/ our daughter is over I’ll be able to have the ability to do the extra typing.

      In the meantime-if you have a MIL story (good, funny, bad and ugly) please consider sending it to me to include!  Just listening to my stories won’t be near interesting enough!



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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Max0125 wrote Mar 12, 2010
    • I am divorced and have several horrible stories regarding my relationship with my former MIL. I believe that we would fall into the chapter of “Bad Examples“. She was codependent and I was and stil am a rebel at heart. She thought that it was her mission in life to “reform me“. Actually, I had a worse relationship with my former FIL who told me that I had big feet (size 7 1/2) and that I should put my dog to sleep as his son, my ex was sure to become allergic to him in the future. Needless to say I am happily divorced!

      I will check with my friends to see if they have any funny MIL stories.  

      Good luck and hope that you hand heels quickly!



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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Carine Nadel wrote Mar 12, 2010
    • as I said I’m looking for all kinds.  I hear you-my MIL told us “you are stupid for feeling bad about losing your dog-I’ve had to live as an abandoned wife, how fair is that?”

      The woman was NOT abandoned, fil died (and he was a piece of work).  However, she wasn’t getting much sympathy as a widow and decided she’d get more attention if she told everyone, including those who knew the truth, that she was abandoned!  it would be funny if it weren’t so incredibly sad and disgusting.



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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Vikki Hall wrote Mar 12, 2010
    • Hmmmm.... I’m not sure if I should comment on the blog or the comments! Lol!!!!

      Anyways I think you would be great as a blog/writer coach and I bet you could offer to tutor students thru the local schools. Also being involved with your local Chamber of Commerce puts you in touch with all kinds of peopla and you just never know who you will meet.

      As for cooking......maybe you could test an online cooking class for dummies like me and see what spins off of that.

      As for the MIL I love both of mine! My ex hubz mom is great and so is my my current hubz. The only thing I could say is that my current probably likes me more as a DIL now that I cook but she always liked me as a woman.

      And as for dominos..... I LOVE playing the actual game!



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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Carine Nadel wrote Mar 12, 2010
    • good ideas Vikki!  and please-pick out some of you “good” mil stories and send them to me!



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