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I hate when the weather is gloomy.  It makes me gloomy.  

I hate hurting.  I hate lying to myself.  I hate pretending.  

I hate being lied to and knowing full well that you are being lied to.  Do I just move on?  Do I just keep lying to myself?  Do I keep praying that things will get better?  Or do I face it head on?

I hate not knowing.  I hate knowing.  But knowing will help me decide what action to take.  Get rid of the scab or leave it to just scar and just be a reminder?

I hurt so much!  I thought everything was great.  I thought I had moved on.  But deep in my mind I didn’t.  I’m still getting reminders.  I want to believe.  I want to trust.  

I just hurt too much!


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