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It is official 2009 is finally over and a new year has begun.  So much has happened this past year that the time seem to drag...seems to happen that way...when things are down time seems to go on and on...but when all is going well you ask yourself...“where has the time gone?”  

I had so many issues that I had to deal with in 2009...my health was on the top of that list...first of all I had uncontrollable blood pressure that caused me all sorts of problems...then I started smoking again...a substantial amount of weight gain...stresssss...and of course my depression...and I am happy to say that these are all pretty much under control and manageable.

I was also diagnosed with diabetes...one of the things I most dreaded...I am not sure why I was so afraid of it...but now that I have it and understand it the fear has subsided...I have to keep myself in check...watch my diet...lose some weight and hopefully I will never have to take medications or insulen...I keeping my fingers crossed on that one.

My depression is lessening...I am getting out more...which means more exercise...which also means a loss of almost 30 pounds...I have been more socialable which is a great accomplishment as at one point I wouldn’t leave my home at all...I think back and ask myself “What the hell was I thinking?“.  “Who does this?? not a sane person that’s for sure.  But I guess that comes with the depression...since I am slowly getting better the doctor wants to keep me on the pills for at least another 9 months or so then she will have to wean me off as I am on a pretty high dosage.  Something that I am looking forward to.

The weight gain was a result of partially my depression but also that I had quit smoking for almost one year...and to be totally honest that was the reason I started up smoking again...stupid on my part because I can’t stand smoking anymore...

Stress...well we all know what that is...mine was mainly cause I was doing too much for everyone else and not enough for me...but that is going to change...yeah I know what you are thinking...we have all heard that one before...but this time it is different...I have so much more at stake...my health, my sanity...these are all important to me...and the funny thing is I have just only begun to realize that...

So for 2010...I am NOT going to make any real resolutions...only changes...positive changes...changes that will benefit me...So here’s to a new year...new adventure and a new me. (did I say that?) LOL




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