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Well, actually, I’m at it again. LOL! When I left my ex husband I left the majority of everything of any value behind, literally furnishing my apartment with stuff that was stashed in our garage.  There is well over $35K worth of furniture, paintings, etc. in the house. Over the two years it took to get divorced we shared 28 emails concerning this but never managed to get it done before the divorce, a fact that worked heavily in his favor.  When we divorced my inept attorney neglected to attach the list of items in the house as an exhibit to the Petition for Dissolution so I had to mention the fact that we hadn’t worked out the items in the house to the judge who verbally told us to continue to work on it.  Unfortunately, the recording of the trial cut off prematurely before she said this which leaves me with no tangible proof that she said it.  It’s literally his word against mine at this point.  I have just filed a motion to clarify orders which, among other things, includes requiring him to share our possessions.  After the divorce, when I asked to continue working on this he quoted the divorce decree where it said everything in his possession at the time of the divorce would remain his which meant he owned everything! I was stunned, hurt, angry and upset, very, very upset.  Well, I didn’t have any money to fight him so I capitulated but since then I’ve acquired some and hired another attorney which is where the motion came from.  I mailed it to him yesterday, he got it today and here is what he said.  “I thought you agreed with me, are you just trying to cause me additional trauma and stress?”  Wh..wha..WHAT???!!!! It’s amazing how bullies work isn’t it?  They turn everything around to be about themselves and have no ability to see the irony in their way of thinking or the end results of their actions.  Well, I have no idea if the judge will rule for me or against me but it is something that was hanging out there that I needed resolution on.   As I told him resolution is NOT capitulation.  Wish me luck, he deserves to lose this one but it’s completely out of my hands at this point.  What’s most important is he isn’t getting to me like he used to.  Now it’s all about me baby.  YES!




Member Comments

    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      UK Girl wrote May 12, 2010
    • My comment to you dear as someone who went through a costly divorce is to take a deep breath put some bright lipstick on and step up to the plate and bully back - just bully bully bully because we know if you have the grit to just push him once very hard he will fold but it’s finding the grit to do the huge push  

      Good luck honey heart

      Oh and remember your a babe in total control of her self BITCH



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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Linda James-Laville wrote May 12, 2010
    • Thank you Ladies!  Yes, he is a big bully and yes I am pushing back because I’ve discovered the most important thing of my life, he can’t control me or harm me any more because I am free of him.  This is all about me and about my need for justice and/or resolution either way. He knows what he did and he knows what he did was wrong but that isn’t my problem, my problem is the need to come to a conclusion about this and move on, move even further away from him.  I’ll let you all know what happens.  happy



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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Cathie Beck wrote May 12, 2010
    • Linda, this (your post) couldn't come at a better time for me!    

      I’m going through a battle of “the fence repairs“. Thought I’d be nice and leave him a message to tell him his attorney is out of town until this following Monday and that if
      he fixed the fence by Friday I would let my attorney know so she didn’t have to call his
      that would cost Him more. (He has to pay my attorney fees.) Well.... he answered the phone and he started yelling so I hung up. It costing him more is his problem.  

      Maybe if your X will have to pay your attorney fees for the readdress on community property he will be change his attitude?  

      Hoping the best for you,
      Cathie



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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Linda James-Laville wrote May 12, 2010
    • He says he’s going to ask the courts to pay for his attorney fees.  I didn’t even include that in my motion but it will be in my response.  It’s already cost me $1200.  Thanks for the response and well wishes.  I hope it works out too, it’s a lot like having a tiger by the tail, he’s so enraged.



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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Mztracy wrote May 12, 2010
    • go get him GF!!
      Sometimes the only way to stop a bully is to face him head one!!
      You can do it!! heartheart



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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Linda James-Laville wrote May 12, 2010
    • Thanks I’m doing the best I can.  it’s been a long road and he’s ferocious but I’m not backing down though it will end up costing me financially if it goes against me.  Resolution isn’t about money, it’s about knowing you’ve done all you can to fight the tyranny and obtain justice.  What form that justice comes in or if it comes at all is out of my control.



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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Linda James-Laville wrote May 12, 2010
    • Thank you Frannie for the good luck and the hug!  :)heart



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