|Sign-up, its free!||Close [x]|
As I’ve mentioned a time or two in the last few days, my eldest step-daughter is visiting us from Canada.
One of the highlights of her trips these last two years (she comes once a year) has been getting to know her niece (our granddaughter) Hailie, who she misses terribly all year long.
For a bit of background, relations are currently somewhat strained between Hailie’s mom (our daughter-in-law) and the rest of the family. It has basically been made clear to all of us that if we want a relationship with this beautiful child, then we will have to work for it, because Mom isn’t at all motivated to make any efforts toward keeping her daughter a part of anyone’s life.
Hailie’s father shares his own responsibility in the way things are deteriorating, but many (not all) are eager to excuse him first, because he is a full-time student, holding down a full-time (50 hrs. a week) job, and typically the only one taking care of any of the cooking, cleaning and general care of the family.
Communication being what it is between all of us (pretty much a lack of), we were still somewhat surprised the other day to discover that said son and daughter-in-law have been making plans for Hailie’s future in which NONE of us are really being considered.
Apparently, they’ve decided that son’s best friend is a better choice to raise Hailie in the event that something were to happen to both of her parents. He’s an attorney, see, and therefore would “be in a better position financially” to bear the burden.
I have to say, this news has a cumulative and far-reaching sting.
1.) We wouldn’t even know anything about it, if not for the visiting daughter having overheard the conversation (as they discussed it right in front of her, as if she wasn’t even in the room).
2.) There are a total of 3 siblings and 3 sets of grandparents who have all been determined not worthy of either raising the child, or a face-to-face discussion of such.
Scott’s daughter said that when she protested, she was assured that provisions will be made so that Hailie’s lawyer-guardian will make sure everyone gets time with her. But her own parents aren’t even doing that, so how in the world are we supposed to believe that will ever happen?
I’m just so frustrated, and my heart hurts. Not just for my husband, who was a wonderful father to his three children, but also for my step-daughters, who have taken the news quite hard.
So what do we do? How are we supposed to feel in the face of this news?