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Has anyone ever googled “New Year Resolutions?”  I had such a fun time once I discovered that there are New Year Resolutions for EVERYTHING AND ANYONE, including pets!!!  Oh, my gosh!  You have got to check it out!  It is hysterical!!! I absolutely LOVE the pets resolutions!  Guess what the #1 pet resolution is.......  “I will NOT chase the damned stick unless I see it LEAVE HIS HAND.”  (Way too funny!)  For more pet humor, I found a Cat’s New Years Resolution: “My human will never let me eat her pet hamster, and I am at peace with that.”  To view the entire hysterical list, go to [Link Removed]

If you are a dog lover, you will love this list of Dog New Years Resolutions: “I will not lick my humans face after eating animal poop.”  (yuck!)  For all dog lovers, check out this cute list of Dog New Years Resolutions at [Link Removed]

As a professional Makeup Artist, I was shocked to actually locate a website just for Makeup Artists New Year’s Resolutions.  The #1 resolution for a Makeup Artist is “To get paid!”  (Although, this sounds odd and funny to some people, the truth is, I just had a freelance makeup job with a popular cosmetic company that did not pay me for my work.  They owed me over $400 so you can imagine how frustrated I was when I never received payment for my work!  To make a long story short, I made a few phone calls to Labor Relations and Better Business Bureau.  I persistently emailed and called the sales representative who hired me for the freelance work.  After two months of continuously attempting to get my paycheck from this cosmetic company, I finally received my paycheck the week of Christmas.  Persistence paid off!!!)  For the top 10 New Year’s Resolutions for a Makeup Artist, go to [Link Removed]

For the artsy type, such as my friend Lizard, I love the New Year’s Resolutions For Artist’s:
“I Will Create a Portfolio- Whether your art is personal or professional, there’s no point in telling people in vague terms about what you do. Show them! There are many ways you can share your art. Take some photographs and keep a mini-album in your purse or satchel. Scan and print some works. Save them to a disk you can hand out. Make a business card. Put your drawing on a T-Shirt.”
(I think that this was an AWESOME suggestion listed in the resolution! As a Makeup Artist, I have a portfolio of my makeup & hairstyling work. It is a good way to gain credibility and get some work!)
For all art lovers, check out some cool New Year’s Resolutions For Artists and Painters at,
[Link Removed]

For more funny New Year’s Resolutions, I discovered another website that listed some humorous resolutions, such as “I will answer my snail mail with the same enthusiasm with which I answer my e-mail.”  To read more funny New Year’s Resolutions, go to [Link Removed]


Godsglamourgirl, Your links have been removed, please consider upgrading to premium membership.



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Member Comments

    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      (華娃娃) ChinaDoll wrote Dec 28, 2008
    • I like this one so I copy and post here. Thanks for sharing.  

      New Year’s Resolutions for Dogs

         1. I will not play tug-of-war with Dad’s underwear when he’s on the toilet.

         2. I’ll remember that the garbage collector is NOT stealing our stuff.

         3. I do not need to suddenly stand straight up when I’m lying under the coffee table.

         4. I will not roll my toys behind the fridge.

         5. I must shake the rainwater out of my fur BEFORE entering the house.

         6. I will not eat the cats’ food, before or after they eat it.

         7. I will stop trying to find the few remaining pieces of clean carpet in the house when I am about to throw up.

         8. I will not throw up in the car.

         9. I will not roll on dead seagulls, fish, crabs, etc.

        10. I will not lick my human’s face after eating animal poop.

        11. “Kitty box crunchies” are not food.

        12. I will not eat any more socks and then redeposit them in the backyard after processing.

        13. The diaper pail is not a cookie jar.

        14. I will not wake Mommy up by sticking my cold, wet nose up her bottom end.

        15. I will not chew my human’s toothbrush and not tell them.

        16. I will not chew crayons or pens, especially not the red ones, or my people will think I am hemorrhaging.

        17. When in the car, I will not insist on having the window rolled down when it’s raining outside.

        18. We do not have a doorbell. I will not bark each time I hear one on TV.

        19. I will not steal my Mom’s underwear and dance all over the back yard with it.

        20. The sofa is not a face towel. Neither are Mom and Dad’s laps.

        21. My head does not belong in the refrigerator.

        22. I will not bite the officer’s hand when he reaches in for Mom’s driver’s license and car registration.  

      My big German Shepherd needs to stick to #10 & #22.  She is currently eating up all 9 puppies poops.  I have a race with her everyday to see who get to the poops first.  Crazy.



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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Dana Arcuri wrote Dec 29, 2008
    • Those pet New Year’s Resolutions are so funny!



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