Don't have an account? To participate in discussions consider signing up or signing in
facebook connect
Sign-up, its free! Close [x]

Benefits

  • okay Create lasting relationships with other like minded women.
  • okay Blogging, let your voice be heard!
  • okay Interact with other women through blogs,questions and groups.
  • okay Photo Album, upload your most recent vacation pictures.
  • okay Contests, Free weekly prize drawing.
  • okay Weekly Newsletter.

+12
Love it

I continue to be amazed at media's impact on just about everything. Last night I did something that I haven't done in years. I picked up a recent issue of People magazine and read rehashed January's "news'. Jessica Simpson was dubbed "Jumbo Jessica" by the New York Post and added to their list of "50 Fat Celebrities."

Miss Simpson is a size 4, please tell me, "How can this be possible?"
Sports Illustrated swimsuit model and Dancing with the Stars TV persona Rachel Hunter was another name on that list.

People across the country were shocked by celebs weight gain, "all few pounds of it." The media couldn't get enough of it, as it was talked about like some major news. Seeing photos of these girls I couldn't help but wonder, have we completely lost it as a society?
Is it not at all normal to have some weight fluctuation during our lifetime, even if we are shining stars on the tv screen? Can no one get a break anymore for having some extra weight on their hips & thighs?

wineIn February, German designer Wolfgang Jopp suggested that model Heidi Klum (shown here) was "too heavy" for the runway. "Too Fat to Model?" was People magazine's headline dishing the news.

WOW, most women I know would give up their right arm to have Heidi's body, and what man would decline a date with her?

In recent months, celebrities like Jennifer Love Hewitt, Eva Longoria Parker and Mischa Barton have all been under the "fat attack".  

The media's fixation on personal appearance and celebrities weight gain sends a wrong message to all women. All teenage girls are obsessed with being a size zero, and the ones who are not expect to be criticized.

No mentions of the fact that 95% of American women will never live up to Hollywood standards, and will try anything from pills to extreme fad diets to control their weight trying to fit the "norm."

marelyn monrowWe have come a long way in a short period of time. A few decade ago, Jayne Mansfield and Marilyn Monroe (below) were considered "ideal" beauties. Today they would be topping that "fat list".

I grew up in Russia where women were expected to have curves and some extra weight was not a taboo. When we immigrated I battled my weight and tried hard to fit the "norm," but who was I kidding?  

I'm Yana Berlin, I'm pleasantly, proportionally plump, and if that gets me to the "fat list" right next to Marilyn Monroe & Heidi Klum, I'm proud to say, I'm fat and I like it this way.

Picture Source 

+12
Love it


  •  

Member Comments

    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Cynthia Schmidt wrote Apr 7, 2009
    • We need to vote with our feet and with our pocketbooks. These pinheads who are dictating what is considered attractive in this country and beyond make their living doing just that. If we don’t buy their magazines, if we don’t buy their diet products, if we ignore their ridiculous words, their views would change in a heartbeat.  

      Good post Yana. It certainly got me all fired up this morning!



            Report  Reply


    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Vikki Hall wrote Apr 7, 2009
    • I wish this message could be shared with all young girls. They grow up now with such unrealistic expectations and kill themselves trying to fit the ‘mold‘.
      I would gladly love being compared to Marilyn or Jayne....



            Report  Reply


    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Lisa Middlesworth wrote Apr 7, 2009
    • It would go insane if I had to deal with someone advertising every little ounce I gain. It would drive me off the deep end, I’m sure.
      Normally, when and if I read a complete article about someone, I don’t believe it. I stopped spending my money on these magazines years ago.
      It just amazes me that folks are so shallow about weight. Big or little, we are who we are, got to love us.



            Report  Reply


    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Yana Berlin wrote Apr 7, 2009
    • Vikki,

      On top of this blog there is a Facebook button, you can share this on your Facebook page and ask everyone to share it with their daughters, nieces, and their friends.

      It’s up to all of us to spread the word that not everyone has to be size zero or size 2. We come in different shapes & sizes, and there is just that much more of us to love. estatic



            Report  Reply


    • +2 votes vote up vote up

      3sa wrote Apr 7, 2009
    • When will they stop, can’t they see we don’t care anymore?
      The average U.S. woman is a size 14, according to the Los Angeles Times.

      Once they “get it” there won’t be anymore PLUS SIZE it will be sizes for UNDER SIZE!!!



            Report  Reply


    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Vikki Hall wrote Apr 7, 2009
    • Thx! I will...



            Report  Reply


    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Mztracy wrote Apr 7, 2009
    • then i must be on the obese list! frownohhhhworried



            Report  Reply


    • +1 votes vote up vote up

      Lisa Middlesworth wrote Apr 7, 2009
    • Me too Mztracy...it's crazy. I created this place in my mind that's called the big and beautiful club.
      I am a size 14/15 womens
      I am big and I am beautiful.
      anybody want to join? haha



            Report  Reply


    • +1 votes vote up vote up

      Magnolia wrote Apr 7, 2009
    • This kind of stuff makes our young girls turn to drugs to stay thin. It’s really gotten out of in hand in opinion! frown



            Report  Reply


    • +1 votes vote up vote up

      Erin50 wrote Apr 7, 2009
    • This is a problem that is epidemic in this country.  I think American women would be far less obsessed with it if American men didn’t expect women to look this way.  My ex-husband used to tell me I was as big as a barn when I was a size 7, and a former boyfriend said I would look like a fat snake on the beach when I purchased a size 10 snake pattern swimsuit.  Women go out on dates and pick at their salads lest they get a comment about gaining weight.  Men on dating sites skip by the profile of a woman who has the guts to admit she has a few extra pounds. It is a sickness that while not totally confined to this country, is predominant here.
      My current boyfriend of 3 yrs is from England.  He is still having to undo the damage that previous American men have done to me with their cruelty.  My weight is the one area in my life that I have insecurity about.  I am now at age 50, a size 12.  The BF is delighted with my curves and assures me that European men love a woman with meat on her.  I know he is sincere when he says this but I still feel disgusted with my menopausal body.  

      We are bombarded every single day with photographs of emaciated women who are either starving themselves or abusing drugs, and also pictures where every lump and bump is airbrushed away to look smooth, hairless and un-natural.  And it is getting worse.  I just wish some of these celebs would not bow down under the pressure (Jessica and Jennifer Love eventually did after initally sticking up for themselves).
      Sorry for the long post but this is one that really sticks in my craw.  Women are wonderful beings.  We should be able to hold our heads up high no matter what we look like.



            Report  Reply


    • +1 votes vote up vote up

      Lisa Middlesworth wrote Apr 7, 2009
    • you‘re in.
      Now you just have to believe that no matter what size we are, we are all beautiful women.
      As long as we do what we can to stay fit and healthy, it really doesn’t matter what size we are.



            Report  Reply


    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Deprogrammed wrote Apr 7, 2009
    • Good lord!  And the ridiculous methods used to determine obesity!  According to the so-called BMI determination methods, I would be considered waaaay obese - but I’m 5‘7“, weigh 185 lbs, and wear a size 9-10 - muscular, compact (and top heavy even after a reduction mammoplasty).  My 13 year old granddaughter is already my height, and is developing the same way, as is her 10 year old sister.  I tell them all the time they are gorgeous no matter what, no matter how, and all you have to do is smile to make the sun come out.  My son (their father) does everything he can to make sure they know that taking care of both the inside and outside is what makes them unstoppable.  Kudos to my baby!  His wife?  Same build as his mamma, and her mamma before her, and her mamma before that.

      I can’t stand the media inconsistencies.  For instance, Beyonce is called fat, but Jennifer Lopez is called hot.  They both have what we used to call “child bearing hips,” full, rounded, looking-like-women figures but one of them is called fat?  Lord, to be that kind of fat!  

      I’ll relinquish my soapbox now, but as you can see this kind of esteem-leveling crap bugs the heck out of me, and I try to counteract it whenever I can.  It’s time to take “keeping it real” out of hip-hop and apply it to our hips.  For real.



            Report  Reply


    • +2 votes vote up vote up

      Encee wrote Apr 7, 2009
    • There are always going to be rude people, unfortunately.  Some of them just like the attention it gets.  

      But let’s not go the other way.  Being slim and trim is not a crime either.  Remember, the U.S. leads the world in obesity, and that’s causing many health problems here.  

      Furthermore, there’s a lot of ugly comments made to middle-aged women, like myself, and my mother before me, my sister, etc.,  who stay pretty much the same throughout life.  We should be treatly with dislike, even hatred because of it?  How fair is that?  

      Trust me, if you’ve been made to feel insulted because of being fuller bodied, us lean women get plenty of ugly comments made to us as well.  I’m not about to hang my head in shame either.  

      I say, let’s be respectful of each other.



            Report  Reply


    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Askjacki wrote Apr 7, 2009
    • estaticGreat post Yana. Just add me to the list... sounds like great company to me!



            Report  Reply


    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Askjacki wrote Apr 7, 2009
    • Great post Yana. Just add me to the list... sounds like great company to me!



            Report  Reply


    • +2 votes vote up vote up

      Margiescuties wrote Apr 7, 2009
    • PROUD TO BE A FAT size 8, 46 year old mother



            Report  Reply


    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Erin50 wrote Apr 7, 2009
    • Nancy, I don’t think anyone is criticizing a normally thin, healthy slim person on here.  It is the artificial unrealistic illusion of how women are expected to look that is at issue here.  And with all due respect, I don’t think you could have any idea how painful it feels to be called fat or a fat pig.  And I say that with no malice at all.  Kudos to you that you were genetically blessed.



            Report  Reply


    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Yana Berlin wrote Apr 7, 2009
    • I think we should start our own list and pitch it to the media.

      I'm Fabulously40 and Beyond. Pleasantly, Proportionally Plump, and Proud of It.

      Sign your name bellow mine:

      Yana Berlin



            Report  Reply




  •         Report  Reply


    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Jenz ~ wrote Apr 7, 2009
    • I’m a 5 ft 7 1/2 inch tall size 6.
      Would the New York Post deem me a heifer? PFFFT! SHOW me the person who said these things. I’d LOVE to critique THEM! Their looks, weight and clothes.
      Show me a pic!  

      As for Jessica, she’s got looks, a fashion line, a bag line, a perfume line and a number 1 cd right now. Fat? Whatever.

      Heidi Klum? FAT? Yeah, ok. That must be why she made millions modeling. WHATEV.

      I’d love the chance to critique each press person that says these things.



            Report  Reply


    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Tally Green wrote Apr 7, 2009
    • Great Article Yana
      This problem is very real in this world. The thing that bugs me the most is we come in all sizes and shapes. I do not think that any ad agency especially modeling ones should
      make a person lose all of there self-esteem and confidence regarding there body.  I believe it is far more important to be healthy.  Forget about trying to please all of these people who market you for there profit.  In the long run the young girls will have suffered terribly.  We as woman have to be happy with who are.  We cannot let this society label us and mess with our minds.



            Report  Reply


    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Erin50 wrote Apr 7, 2009
    • Erin Woodward



            Report  Reply


    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Victoria Bryant wrote Apr 7, 2009
    • I agree ladies! By the way , when did things change and who exactly sets these standards. I have personally never met a mn who wanted to date a stick figure. I meet men and I’m a size 14 so they obviously like me the way I am. Although, I must say that recently I’ve changed my eating habits because my cholesterol is too high. I think that should be our main concern...am I healthy? do I feel good? are my clothes a good fit for my bodysize?
      Oh and Margie, you‘re not fat, you‘re hot and radiate confidence!



            Report  Reply




  •         Report  Reply


    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Carine Nadel wrote Apr 7, 2009
    • no wonder we all feel horrible about our bodies!  I too wonder, I’m 5‘1-1/2” and wear size 2-4-yet I’ve been feeling “fat” since I broke my foot and menopause really kicked in.  I’m forever trying to “lose the prednisone/hormone 8 pounds”

      shame on us for buying into the entire nonsense.



            Report  Reply


    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Mair21 wrote Apr 7, 2009
    • This is a great article and sadly enough, very true. It is a very sad situation and getting worse for the teenagers of today. As long as you are heart healthy size should not matter one bit. I gained 10 lbs after having my son at age 40, needless to say I went up to 130 lbs on a 5‘5” frame....I was told I was getting chunky.  I couldn’t believe it.  A size 4/6 and I was considered chunky....what is this world coming to.  Do you have to be sickly skinny to be considered attractive.  And for Jennifer Love....I would love to be a larger breasted woman.  She has a great body in my opinion!! Her curves are great...Shame on the media!



            Report  Reply




  •         Report  Reply


    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Erin50 wrote Apr 7, 2009
    • Menopause is a big problem too because the weight doesn’t seem to budge; plus the weight distributes itself in different areas (mid section) than you‘re used to.  Try finding a pair of jeans that fit after the menopause belly makes its appearance.  I am here to tell you, it ain’t easy!



            Report  Reply


    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Shyshy wrote Apr 7, 2009
    • I have never been, nor will I ever be a size 8, never mind a size 4 or 0. I think it’s ridiculous for women with “curves” to be compared to the thin, stick-figures of todays models. If I tried to live up to that, I would be a divorced, childless, anorexic. My family loves me just the way I am. And I am growing more comfortable in my own skin every day!



            Report  Reply


    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Suzannabrain wrote Apr 7, 2009
    • Thanks for the article, Yana, and all these interesting commments. This is such a big issue with desperation at both ends of the spectrum. The poor self image runs so deep that it doesn’t seem to matter whether women are emaciated, overweight, or anything in between, there is still a problem.

      I have a little trick to adjust my thinking now and then. I ask myself “What are you fit for?” Fitness is all I really care about. I know I am too heavy when I can’t comfortably climb the hill near my house. I’m not “fit” for it. I don’t need any other measurements, medical tests, or magazine articles. I want to be active and mobile - increasingly so through my life - and if my weight/pants size is smaller as a result, that’s just what happens. I too am taken by surprise by an extra 8 pounds as menopause begins. But the same question remains. “What am I fit for?” I need to hike, walk, bike and dance more. Lots more.  

      It’s also important to keep in mind that models not only live unbearably bleak lives with almost no food, but even with that existence, their images are airbrushed and altered for the magazines. Many actresses have undergone multiple surgeries to carve them into a certain look. NOT REAL. SERIOUSLY NOT REAL. This is a big part of the damage being done as our citizens remain hypnotized by many forms of media.  

      Let’s play, bound around joyfully, test our physical limits, discover fantastic and healthy foods that we love, eat plenty of organic dark chocolate, and laugh our heads off with all the endorphins! And when you‘re in line at the grocery store, do what I do: Turn all those magazines around backwards in their racks. So satisfying!

      With joyful blessings for all our amazing and brilliant women here,
      Suzanna Stinnett



            Report  Reply


    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      3sa wrote Apr 7, 2009
    • theresa saunders!



            Report  Reply


    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Sherry wrote Apr 7, 2009
    • Fat on the outside of a person is much better than having it on the inside.  I am sure we can all think of someone who is beautiful on the outside but the inside of the person is full of “fat and junk” that makes them totally unattractive!



            Report  Reply


    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Joyousone wrote Apr 7, 2009
    • Well I for one agree that way too much emphasis is placed on weight and what is the ideal shape of today’s woman.  Young girls especially are honed into the fact of “skinny, skinny, skinny.”  It usually comes out as very unhealthy in mind and body.  I have never been labeled skinny or even close to it - have always been considered “pleasingly plump.”  Now getting into my Senior years at 62, I find I should try to lose a few pounds mostly for my own health.  I’ve gone through the many diets and Weight Watchers but find just watching what I eat and getting some exercise is the best way to do this.  I have a closet full of clothes that are all different sizes 12 - 16 and I’ve fluctuated between them at all times in my life.  Hey, variety is the spice of life.  The ideal weight in one’s life I believe is how good you feel with yourself - not in everyone else’s mind.  I say the heck with all these other critical people - I’d give anything to have the figure of a Marilyn Monroe or Heidi Klum any day but ... I’d be happy with me as long as I like me in all ways and not just the weight.



            Report  Reply


    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Jenz ~ wrote Apr 7, 2009
    • I haven’t seen a model yet that lives a bleak life, however, the press is quite ridiculous.
      As for airbrushing, send me your crappiest picture- I’ll make you look like a supermodel with my airbrush just to prove a point.

      Of course they‘re airbrushed. As for the press calling people fat, please send me a picture of the person who continues to say these things about talented and beautiful people.



            Report  Reply


    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Margiescuties wrote Apr 7, 2009
    • Hi Jenz41: You can try airbrushing my bikini pic I placed here and erase all the extra pounds. LOL

      I find ridiculous that some people think a perfect body is size 4 or less. A perfect body is what you feel comfortable with. I am going through my pre-menopause, no hormone treatment. I just care about exercising to feel good and be healthy. I don’t care about the “ideal” weight for fashion purposes.

      For the records... I wear a bikini to the beach because I feel more comfortable bathing in a bikini that in a one piece suit. I don’t do it because I am this or that size.

      I love being in my 40s because I feel better with myself than when I was younger.



            Report  Reply


    • +1 votes vote up vote up

      3sa wrote Apr 7, 2009
    • LOL I am in a bad mood today....



            Report  Reply


    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Vikki Hall wrote Apr 7, 2009
    • I posted to FB and wish everyone would also post to their other social sites....

      Vikki Hall



            Report  Reply


    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Inakika wrote Apr 7, 2009
    • AMEN!!estatic I love my curves and I plan to keep them. Besides, nobody wants a bone but a dog!



            Report  Reply


    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Susan Dahringer wrote Apr 7, 2009
    • Yana,

      Your blog was great! Like carine ,I am on the extremely thin side...It doesn’t matter if you‘re heavy or too thin ,people will criticize no matter what.As long as your happy and healthy and your hubby loves you,who cares what everyone else thinks



            Report  Reply


    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Mjmurphy wrote Apr 7, 2009
    • Years ago Ms. magazine took an ad with the perfect model and placed it at the top of the page, when I looked at it I thought she is so beautiful and how I needed to lose weight and look prettier...as I read the article my whole perspective changed. At the bottom of the page was a picture of a holocaust victim and the article was challenging you to really look at the women and compare them. First, all I seen was the glamour of the woman at the top, her smile, her make up and the luxurious surroundings, and at the bottom I saw the filth, the bleak expression, the extreme sadness, and the torture this obviously starved woman had endured. But then I began to really compare their actual bodies and they were the same, both had skeletal arms, bones pushing against skin all over and gaunt faces. This was a wake up call to me and I never bought another fashion or celebrity magazine after that. I refused to be hypnotized any longer and I did not want that for my daughters either.

      I’m on the list Yana. My name is Mary Jo Murphy



            Report  Reply


    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Stephanie Lawrence wrote Apr 7, 2009
    • I love my size(16) and I’ve always been comfortable with it.



            Report  Reply


    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Janey07 wrote Apr 7, 2009
    • I enjoyed reading this very much and I have so much to say that I might have to write an article on this.  

      I am thin.  Like Nancy (Nancy?  right?) I’ve had some bad comments or have been not well liked, but that’s okay because I know where it comes from.  

      Now...despite the fact that I am small, I gained about 7 lbs two years ago and it landed in my belly.  My husband was really turned off by the extra fat and even though i could still wear a size 4 he thought I was getting plump.  I lost the weight and am now down to size 2 and he seems to think I look okay the way I am.  I don’t suffer at this size, I still eat and eat a lot, but I also work out almost every day.  

      What I find is that American men tend to like skinny women.  Not all men maybe not even most, but a lot do.  European men tend to like their women with more curves (I know, I lived in Europe for two years and I couldn’t get a guy to give me a second glance if I paraded around the street stark naked and in heels!).

      Now..let me say this ladies:  Being thin doesn’t mean you aren’t immune to insults.  All my thin life I felt unattractive to men because I have a look that is just plain different.  I would go out with guys and get dumped for heavier women because the men just found that prettier.  That’s tough, but try getting any sympathy from anyone when you wear a size 2.  There were times when I ate an etire box of cookies just so I could look like my friends.

      Anyway, I have really really strong feelings about this because unfortunately, I feel like the way I look has dictated a lot about the way I live my life.  I know it is much worse for young girls today than it was when I was young (about 2000 years ago!!!!).

      Thanks Yana for getting us all writing and commenting and thinking about an issue that is very relelvent even for us over the age of 40.



            Report  Reply


    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Stephanie Lawrence wrote Apr 7, 2009
    • ooops!!!!!!!!!! Yana put me on the list also. Stephanie Lawrence



            Report  Reply


About this author View Blog » 
author