I-PHONE DIVAS

MARY‘S TAKE:

Does anyone remember when the I-Phone came out last summer?  Do you remember the story about the girl who was on youtube.com who took her new I-Phone to Europe for a month and ended up with her bill in a HUGE BOX with the total amount of $3000?

This was such big news, it beat out Lindsay Lohan's latest criminal/drug induced activities.

My 19 and 22 year old daughters, Kellie and Cassie had just gotten back from their month-long European adventure (thanks to their generous father). Dave had bought them I-Phones for the trip which I greatly appreciated because they were able to phone, e-mail, text and send me pictures daily!

I informed the girls of this U-tube phone maniac and asked them if they could end up in the same predicament.

"Mom, gawd no way. We hardly used our I-phones at all."

I wasn't convinced.

I told Kellie to just check out their bill on-line just to make sure that their dad wasn't about to suffer any imminent heart attacks. She complied and confidently got on-line with a smug "this is soooooooo unnecessary look on her face".

I was talking to Cassie when all of the sudden we heard Kellie start to hyperventilate. When we asked her what was wrong, she couldn't talk. Lorraine, Kellie COULD NOT TALK, a sound I haven't heard since right before her birth.

After what seemed like an eternity, she stammered, in between the mouth-to-mouth resuscitation I had to do, complete with intermittent thumps on the chest, "Well, our combined I-Phone bill is:

8,076.92!!!!!!"

I'll repeat that Lorraine, just so you know you're not seeing things:

EIGHT THOUSAND, SEVENTY-SIX DOLLARS AND NINETY-TWO CENTS!

Lorraine, tell me what you think as soon as you’ve checked your pulse rate!

LORRAINE‘S TAKE:

Ok Mary,

First off, you better have a scanner and a copy of that bill because I am sure most of our readers will have a tough time believing this and will want verification or begin to call you a total hysteric, definite drama queen or a woman afflicted with Cell Phone Munchausen's Syndrome.

Naturally I believe you since I was aware of the I-phone purchases by Dave, the month long trip to Europe, the generous amount of spending money and the daily phone call/text messages and photos between mother and daughters to keep you informed and relatively calm.

But the ending to this story could be the ending of Dave, as we know him. I don't even want to ask which one of the girls will be the bearer of the financial debacle known as this HISTORY MAKING CELL PHONE BILL.

I hope someone has cardiac paddles handy. I hope Dave's will is in order, and the girls are listed as beneficiaries because that may be the fastest way this bill is going to be paid.

Maybe Dave has an insurance policy on the girls...and when he strangles them he can collect the money, pay the bill, and go straight to jail.

I did read about the other You-Tube girl and her box full of the bill, but you might want to make sure that no publicity is given to this cell situation. The girls are blonde, giggly and like to have fun.... Daddy paid for the new phones and the trip across the sea...and threw in traveling cash to boot... LET THE JOKES BEGIN...

I think Dave will be the first human Mount St. Helens...only he may erupt more than once.

MARY‘S DOUBLE TAKE:

Get out your magnifying glasses, cuz here’s the proof:

Yes, I do feel for Dave. He was being a great father by making sure the girls had good access while they were traveling alone. And like most things that happen to us well-intentioned parents, IT BACKFIRED!

The not so happy conclusion to this story is that AT&T is "reviewing the situation" and will get back to Dave in a couple of weeks.

This is selfish on my part, but I'm SO GLAD my name isn't on any of that bill! I'd have to sell one of my kidneys.

Anyway, I think the girls are in a state of shock and denial about the I-phone bill. In a delusional daze, they're now focusing on "back to school" clothes, eyebrow-waxing appointments and, of course, new Broncos jerseys!

Maybe I can sue AT&T for their therapy bills and Dave's new heart condition...

Mary

P.S.  Yana, did YOU take an I-phone on your recent European Extravaganza???