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Two days ago it was my 41st birthday, and I’ve really come to hate my birthday with good reason. Every year on my “special” day, something goes wrong - big time things not little things, that go awry. Last year’s big 4-0 birthday was the year I had to take my niece and nephew in as their Legal Guardian, since my sister lost her parenting rights.  She is a drug addict and felon, and went to jail.  This made our family of four into a family of six.  Uh-oh.
The year before that I had to cancel plans for my birthday due to my mother’s spreading cancer, and my father’s decision to hold a party in her honor. I get it - she’s due, but on my birthday? Isn’t that a bit pretentious?
Three years ago, hubby decided it was a good day to pick a fight with me and walk out the door. Yeah, this is just typical for him: he doesn’t believe birthdays and holidays should be special for me.
Four years ago, spent my birthday sick as a dog while my husband argued with me to “get over it” then found out I had a ruptured appendix. To the hospital for surgery I go!
The year before that I spent it in Russia adopting a child, with no family or friends around for miles.
All these birthdays seem typical, but it just gets worse each year. This year was a real doozy!
On my birthday, I found out some woman in my children’s school had been bad-mouthing me, calling me fat-a** and basically talking behind my back. Which wasn’t really the worst of it, but it just added insult to injury, when I found out that same day that my husband of 10 years had been seeking out an affair online and had spent the last 2 years speaking to his ex online (ya know, the one who did not want us to get married in the first place, and I’ve never gotten along with). She too had made comments about me to my husband, although he went right along with it, never even thinking to defend me. Maybe I am old-fashioned, but I believe a spouse should defend the honor of of their partner at all times. Not my husband, he would defend total strangers before speaking up for me! Well, we haven’t spoken, I plan to separate (not just over this but more so over the 10 years of this) and I am miserable.
I wish I could figure out a way to bypass birthdays altogether.




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