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pic     I’ve stopped whining and now am listening to satellite music from the ‘70s and doing more unpacking in my new apartment.

And the weirdest thing just happened.

A disco song came on - forget which one, but it was one of the popular ones - and I’m taking a break, sipping ice water, and looking about. And I remembered how much I used to LOVE disco. I’d go to the disco alone, with girlfriends, or with a date, but I’d go. And dance dance dance.  

I closed my eyes and remembered the strobe lights and the repetitive “hooks” of the disco music, and the crowds, the drama, the feeling of being wonderfully lost in music, color, darkness, and lights.

Then I opened my eyes and looked around my apartment, and an Eagles song came on, and I looked at pictures of family members I have framed, and thought about my 45th high school reunion that’s coming up in October, and ... I just smiled.

Throughout it all, I’ve got to say, I’ve had a really good time. In my life. In living. Much more good than bad. Lots of friends, lots of family, situations, careers, nights and days, the beach in Maine, the smell of saltwater, staying up late at night writing poems, hanging out at Macy’s in high school with my girlfriends and ending up at the movies.

How very strange. If I had to summarize my life right now, I’d say ... I’m having a ball. I’m collecting moments, memories, and loves. It’s okay.  

I’m okay.

For a continually depressed, post-traumatic stressed, person, this is quite the revelation.  

I’m okay.

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