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I’ve been through HELL and I’m STILL Here!!!!! That is how I feel girls. I’ve been out of the loop for a while but here I am if only for a moment. I have literally been going through a rough time!!!! I mean all the way around. EVERYTHING THAT YOU COULD THINK OF IS HAPPENING! Has that ever happened to you? The kids the husband, the friends the family the dog and cat!!!!! Everything! I have been a whirlwind of emotion, bitterness, regret, sorrow and pride and I DID NOT WANT TO ASK FOR HELP. I have spent the better part of my life serving people. I love being a servant and have never expected anything in return. Lately my life has been falling down around me and I finally got to the point that all I could do was just fall down and wait on something to happen. Anything would have been a welcomed distraction but NOTHING. No matter how I fought and tried to make things better, nothing changed. I stopped talking to everyone, my husband who is my best friend included. I didn’t want to be a mother, minister, friend, wife nothing all I wanted to do was just curl up and die, but something on the inside just wouldn’t let that happen. Something was pulling me out of the ditch that my self pity was digging. I was really trying to stay in that rut but it wasn’t until I was out that i was able to see how hard I was fighting to be miserable. I say that because all of a sudden i stop fighting and started to breathe. I took a deep breathe and STOP COMPLAINING! Although a good friend really hurt me I realized it was better that I found out when I did what was going on. Although my finances went from 100 to 0 in a day I still had light and heat in my apartment. Although I was ignoring my husband and being stand offish He still came after me. Although I felt comfortable being miserable for a moment...The holy spirit wouldn’t allow me to take up residence in a house of depression. I am blessed. I realize that when you are on assignment for God you open yourself up to be fired upon by the enemy. What do you mean cocco? Well it’s like this We must only do what our father God does and say only what our father God says. We must walk out what we believe in our hearts to be real ministry. We must operate out of the fruits of the spirit. These are Love, Joy, Peace, LONG suffering, Patience, Kindness, Goodness etc. NO matter what is happening around us we must still try to remember who we are in Christ. We must remember that WE are more than conquerers and we are the head and not the tail. We are the lenders and not the borrowers and if we were not a threat to the enemy...he would leave us alone.  I give this word of encouragement to you. It is something that I learned in the midst of all of this...Be like little david was before he slew Goliath. Rehearse you VICTORIES and know that you are a Winner.  David said I slew a bear and killed a lion. That was AWESOME! While he was working he  was practicing for the battle that he would have to fight one day. So it is with us. Everything matters and Everything means something.  Use it to overcome and get stronger.  YOU CAN DO THIS. You can not have a testimony if you never have a TEST. I tell myself daily. I am fighting but...I’m STILL Here!
Blessings



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Member Comments

    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Linni wrote Apr 10, 2009
    • AMEN!

      i agree with you on this my friend!



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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Maria68 wrote Apr 19, 2009
    • Welcome Back Cocco,

      I am glad to hear that you have triumph over your many challenges.
      Enough can not be said about the power of faith.

      Thank you for the inspirational words.



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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Positivepris wrote Apr 20, 2009
    • coco I have no ideal when you wrote this blog,I just join this site today 4-19-09,but this was on point for me ,Thank you for letting God use you.



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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      UK Girl wrote Apr 20, 2009
    • Good point honey as ever ....

      Hope your having a great week



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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Shopgirl1960 wrote Apr 20, 2009
    • Thank you for sharing your “walk“, and I’m sure God is smiling as you give Him glory for his wonderful work in your life!



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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Janet Wooley wrote Jul 1, 2009
    • I know this was written awhile ago but I just read it for the first time today. As uaual it was a good word of encouragement. The question that Termagsea ask why someone who always gives never takes. Those who give are blessed by the act of giving and it says it is better to give than to receive. And Christ gave the ultimate for us, his life! who could do that? No one but Christ. When you really see what his giving has done for you it makes you want to just give all you have and be content with whatever you have. These are some of the most humble people I have ever met.It is quite the opposite of the “world” those who die with the most wins, seems to be their motto. But we are not of this world just in it for awhile.



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