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"My younger sister is engaged." The email somberly reported.  "Could we book a session?  I am a mess."

Why is it the lack of a ring on your finger can cause so much pain? Carole (not her real name) choked out her feelings.  "She is 9 years younger than me.  9.  Josh is crazy about her and he is so romantic it makes me sick.  My throat gets as tight as a knot.  Then I feel horrible.  I LOVE my sister.  I don't want to feel like this but I can't help it.  It should be me.  How can she get married first?"

Her story turned into sobs.  I sat silently on the phone and listened.  Like a spring storm, the sobbing subsided and blowing her nose, she sighed.  "What if it never happens for me?  What if I am a lonely bitter old woman with 100 cats?  I can't stand it.....and now I am going to have to be in HER wedding."  Sobs reignited....

********

Slowly but surely Carole and I turned the flow of her thoughts back into a better place and she recommitted to her own personal love attraction plan.  There is no question that the engagement of a younger sibling, brother or sister, is a painful thing for the long time single woman.

That naked left ring finger makes a public spectacle out of itself. There it is...out there for everyone to see....LOSER.   It takes a mighty strong woman to see this in herself, this branding from the lack of a ring.  It takes an even more magical woman to make the decision to do something about it.

Oprah and Goldie Hawn come to mind.  Two mega successful, beautiful, vibrant, talented and influential women who have naked left ring fingers.  What is it that separates them from other women who let frustration about their relationship status steal their happiness?

Can you control if you are single? Obviously not or you wouldn't be reading this article.  Can you control how much LOVE is in your life?  Absolutely.  THAT I can teach you.

I run my ideas by my husband (soon we will be celebrating our 5th anniversary back in Hawaii where we tied the knot...*sigh*) because, not being a guy, I just want to make sure that my theories make sense.  He is 100% in agreement on this particular Soul Mate Attraction Secret:

There is nothing more attractive than a happy, confident woman. Men cannot resist a genuine smile....the one that comes from deep inside.  That kind of smile works like magic.  Can you control how much true happiness is behind your smile?  Absolutely, I can teach you that too.

You are one tough cookie.  You have been on your own most of your life and you can take care of business.  If you are the women who contact me, you are also pretty darn tired of doing life by yourself.   Sound familiar?

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Member Comments

    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Denise Richardson wrote Aug 31, 2010
    • heartheartGreat post I can remember when I was waiting to re-marry after being divorced for over 16 years. I was so alone and I wanted to be in a committed marriage realtionship, I never did like the being hooked up with someone I wanted it all the commitment, the ring the whole nine yards. It happened but in the waiting period it was hell, I too got tired of paying all the bills alone, sleeping alone, eating alone and just not having that special someone to chat with at night. It is a lonely road, but there is hope, keep looking forward and dare not allow the feelings of hopelessness set in there is someone for everyone if we want it, and trust me some day your knight will come. hearthappy



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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Lazylola wrote Sep 1, 2010
    • heart great post



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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Timbuktu wrote Sep 3, 2010
    • I’m fine about the ‘naked ring finger’ - where would I have time to work, write novels, run a short story competition, hold creative writing days, produce a quarterly local magazine, work on a project that is currently restoring an overgrown orchard to a nature reserve (muddy boots and gardening gloves as well as endless admin work)organise an annual bicycle rally if I wasn’t single. Truly, being single allows me to fly - I go on great holidays too - including to Timbuktu. It can be a lonely life at times but only if I let it, so I don’t!

      T



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