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I haven’t blogged for a long time... not even sure why I am now - except that I have so many emotions inside at the moment... especially anger...  I just can’t let go of B... and I’m angry about that... I can’t move on...  I can’t let go of the dreams... and the promises... or the hurt... A mutual friend asked me if I felt I was supposed to fight for B - and I immediately said “yes“... but I’m not sure I even have the fight in me... I’m empty...  I want the holidays to be over... I don’t want to go be with my family... I don’t want to do anything...  I’ve tried keeping up with the holiday parties and all that CRAP - but I’m just miserable...  and I want to know he’s a miserable also... and I really hate that feeling, too...  I’m not one to want bad for others...  especially when I love them...  and THEN, there’s a man here who has asked me to marry him - several times... and I just can’t even date him... WHY?  Because I can’t let go of B... and I’m not in love with the other guy... WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME???



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Member Comments

    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      (華娃娃) ChinaDoll wrote Dec 15, 2008
    • Nothing wrong with you.
      You are in an emotion struggle.
      Anger is meant to be,
      let it ride and vent,
      it is ok and just be.
      love,



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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      AnneMarie Kimberling wrote Dec 15, 2008
    • There a lots of unanswered questions... no closure...



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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      AnneMarie Kimberling wrote Dec 15, 2008
    • He’s not with anyone else...  He’s all alone... just like me...



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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Ellen O'Connor wrote Dec 15, 2008
    • Hey there Honey,  

      I don’t know you very well but I do know with certainty that you are a wonderful person! Don’t let him have this kind of control over you because anger is not good for you. YOU are the one who is important here. He made his decision and in reality...the long distance relationship would most likely not be satisfying for you.  

      There is nothing wrong with you because of this other person either. If you don’t love him...you just don’t. THe ladies you met a few Tuesdays ago, I am sure could tell you some stories. (I know some of them) Please try not to be reclusive. You know you are always more than welcome to meet with us. The gals liked you so much and we are all so supportive of each other, no matter what is bothering us.  

      Lastly, please remember how much people value you. There is definitely someone out there for you and I’m sure he is a much better person than the one who let you get away.  

      Hugs and kisses....
      Think about coming tomorrow. We would love to see you!  

      XOXOXO..E.



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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Linda Hendricks wrote Dec 15, 2008
    • Your anger is normal.... I agree with Chinadoll... ride with it for a while...

      I think we all have been through a break up at one time or another... and went through all the same emotions...

      I reach inward... concentrate on myself... it’s okay to be selfish... and do things that make you feel better

      I also agree with beachbum... if they guy treated you badly... or popped out of your life without explanation.. then think how he would treat you if the relationship would have progressed... not a pretty picture...  

      when at first we fall in love... we fall in love with what we think the person is like... as time progresses that person either lives up to that or they don’t.. i think B hasn’t lived up to what you deserve...

      You have plenty of friends here... don’t run away



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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      (華娃娃) ChinaDoll wrote Dec 15, 2008
    • AnneMarie, if there is a Fab meeting tomorrow, please go.  Take lots of pictures and share.



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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Shopgirl1960 wrote Dec 16, 2008
    • AnneMarie,

      It’s so hard to have such strong feelings for a man that has given you love and then withdrawn that love. I do believe that his ABSENCE makes your feelings grow STRONGER for him. Try to imagine a different scenerio. Imagine that you HAVE HAD many more years with him. Imagine a lifetime of a daily walk with him. In your mind did he fill your heart with joy? Did you enjoy the same things? Did he make you smile daily? Was it a lot of work to maintain your relationship? Try to remember all of the things that you did NOT really care for about him and concentrate on those things.

      I truly believe that your soul mate is waiting for you girl!
      Annnnnd believe me.... it is WELL WORTH the heartache it takes to travel the road to get to where he is.
      I cannot wait to hear your future stories about the two of you when you meet!  

      I do hope you will try to concentrate on a new found love and your wonderful future together.  I promise you will be so glad you were lead to a road to him!!!

      This is you dear AnnMarie... dream it,believe it!!!



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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Linni wrote Dec 16, 2008
    • Hi Anne Marie..

       i agree with all the ladies here... anger is an emotion that most don’t deal with properly.. i know i do not.. if you allow it, anger will get in the way of ALL your exhisting relationships, your new relationships, and will be something that will even effect your children... ITS NOT WORTH IT.. trust me, im dealing with it now ( anger )

      Linda 08 i agree with you...

       “I also agree with beachbum... if they guy treated you badly... or popped out of your life without explanation.. then think how he would treat you if the relationship would have progressed... not a pretty picture...”  if you stayed together, it could have happened 10 years down the road with more time, energy, and emotion involved.. sometimes its a blessing in disguise!  

      i agree with Della too!  ”  I truly believe that your soul mate is waiting for you girl!
      Annnnnd believe me.... it is WELL WORTH the heartache it takes to travel the road to get to where he is.
      I cannot wait to hear your future stories about the two of you when you meet!  ”

      for now, you need to concentrate on Anne Marie.. get yourself back up and running, and NOT isolate yourself from others! we love you here!

      Love, Linni



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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Jenz ~ wrote Dec 16, 2008
    • Anne Marie,
      It sounds as though you‘re in the eye of the proverbial hurricane of emotion. And this time of year, instead of it being a “category 3” storm, it can easily turn into a “category 5.” ...if that makes sense. (3 being weaker than 5, etc.)
      Please take time to yourself when you are able to spend some very important “Anne Marie time” perhaps in silence, or to write, to sort your thoughts & feelings out. This is crucial for you to do. It is not easy, but it is necessary for you to have some clarity.  

      Are you feeling pressured to make an immediate decision around this situation?

      Re: not being able to let go of promises, dreams and hurt~ I can speak from experience on that one. Especially from the standpoint of not having proper closure. Yes, it can be very excruciating right down to the core of your soul, I know this.
      BUT!
      And yes~ that’s a big BUT, IT WILL PASS when you let it go. It takes a leap of blind faith sometimes. And it is not a cakewalk, and it does not happen over night. If “B” has given you no reason to hold onto all of that for real, you HAVE TO let it go completely for your own well being, peace of mind, and happiness; which by the way, you fully deserve.
      DO not worry about never feeling that certain way again. You will. I promise you that. You WILL have dreams & promises in the future with someone who hasn’t participated in you feeling miserable. Being in love and/or in a loving relationship does NOT include heavy duty turmoil or psychological warfare such as this.  

      You deserve to be happy.
      You deserve to be loved.
      You deserve peace.
      You deserve to NOT be miserable.

      Look in your mirror & say out loud to yourself~ I’m not kidding girl. LOOK in your mirror.
      Say to yourself~
      “I AM Anne Marie. I deserve to be happy. I am worth it.”
      Say it until you believe it. 3x per day if you need to. :)

      Until you do, we are here 24/7.

      Many hugs!!
      J.



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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Mztracy wrote Dec 16, 2008
    • Never settle!! You are too awesome to deal with B. I know how hard it is to let go, but by hanging on in heart...you may be letting the right one get away!!

      I do believe in following your heart, but make sure it is going the right way!!!

      huge huggzzzz



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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Jenz ~ wrote Dec 16, 2008
    • Did someone edit my response?



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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      (華娃娃) ChinaDoll wrote Dec 16, 2008
    • Jenz, what do you mean? No one can edit your response. It was great comment. ???ohhhh



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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Jenz ~ wrote Dec 16, 2008
    • Thank you. :)

      I had another sentence in it... oh well.. maybe I hit backspace ny accident or something. no biggie. :D



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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Mztracy wrote Dec 16, 2008
    • love your post jenz!! Well said



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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Dee Dee Shaw wrote Dec 25, 2008
    • Anne Marie,
      I was thinking of you tonight so I hopped over to check on you. I missed this blog somehow. My heart aches with you. Anger is a strong emotion, but it is only hurting you - not him. Darla would say let go and let God.
      Dee Dee says take your thoughts captive. It can be done! It isn’t easy, and it takes lots of practice, but you can do it. Everytime you think about him, let the anger well up, dwell on what you dreamed your future to be - stop the wheels, take the thought captive, and replace the thought with some of the ones that others have listed above. God has your perfect soul mate waiting for you. Patience is so hard sometimes, but the reward is so worth it. I feel like I am beating a dead horse, but you may not have seen any of the gazillion posts where I plugged Shad Helmstetters books. Get the book “What to Say When You Talk to Yourself” and/or “Who are You Really and What Do You Want.” They are great books - and if you apply what he says, can help you get out of this funk. I hope you are doing okay today. This can be a difficult time of year to cope. Please know that I am here for you if you ever want a listening ear. You can even email me directly if you want - [Link Removed]


      Happymomma, Your links have been removed, please consider upgrading to premium membership.



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