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pic    When I moved out of ex-fiance’s house to my little apartment a few months ago, my life became extraordinary. I had always wanted a cute little place with lots of pink stuff, and a pink chandelier. And I found this small apartment that had potential, and found a pink chandelier (my grandson said, “It looks like a toy!” because it was so small), and decorated the place entirely in “shabby chic.”  

It was truly the first place I had in which I didn’t feel obligated to please, impress, or conform. Not that I wouldn’t be happy to compromise with the right Someone, but the Someone doesn’t exist currently.  

So I’m surrounded by lace, silk flowers, cabbage rose sofa covers, antique-looking picture frames, fringe hanging from lampshades, a tea table with pink roses painted on it, and ... a pink chandelier hanging from the kitchen bar (because I couldn’t get it to hang from the dining nook).

I so love it. To the point of dancing with my bird Kirby to ‘70s music. To almost cooking in my cute little mini-kitchen (at least making tea). To using pink-flowered hat boxes as office supply storage. To finally feeling organized. To my cat feeling at home and happy in her new digs.  

Okay, so the point is?

I’m moving.

I made the decision this evening. I was torn between this life and a life on the east coast where my son and his family live with my 3 grandkids.

I knew no matter what my personal circumstances, if I had the choice, which I gratefully do, being part of the kids’ lives would have to come first.  

Do I want my tombstone to read: “She loved her apartment.“? Or do I want it to read: “She was part of her grandkids’ lives.“?

I just ordered a book from Amazon called A Year by the Sea by Joan Anderson. The first line is a Shakespeare quote from Julius Caesar :

“There is a tide in the affairs of men,
Which, taken at the flood, leads on to fortune;
Omitted, all the voyage of their life
Is bound in shallows and in miseries.
On such a full sea are we now afloat;
And we must take the current when it serves,
Or lose our ventures.”

Shakespeare has always been my fave writer of all time.  

I’m going.

My new apartment on the east coast is not as big as my Texas place, and has little storage. The town my son and family live in is, for me - a born and bred New Yorker - in the middle of nowhere! I’m not looking forward to packing up again, and doing all the chaos-things involved in moving.

But in my heart - that’s where the answer is. My heart is telling me that if I have the choice, which I do, I can’t possibly live a life that doesn’t have my precious grandchildren in it on a daily (or whatever time frame they want) basis. My newest grandchild is just 6 months old. His fave activity is smiling and laughing. How can I not live close to him?

I feel tired, worn out, overwhelmed, and in chaos. But I’m not confused anymore. Whatever I need to do, I must “just do it“.  

I trust that the Universe will help me with the details, and the transport of my 2 little angels (Lexie and Kirby) safely to the east coast. I’m trusting that love is the binding force of the Universe.

And my pink chandelier is small enough to fit anywhere.

Peace,
Suzann
Book Feeder at the [Link Removed] 


Suzann, Your links have been removed, please consider upgrading to premium membership.

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Member Comments

    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Linni wrote Jun 19, 2010
    • love the pink chandelier!
      yes, being around family is so important.. sharing the joys, and sadness ( for what ever reason ) and being apart of thier lives... to me thats what family is about...being TOGETHER..

      great post! thank you for sharing!
      heartheart



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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Max0125 wrote Jun 19, 2010
    • What a wonderful post! I always love it when women do things to suit themselves without regard to the opinions of others. I love your chandelier!Let us know what you think of the book. It sounds interestng.
      Your Grandchildren are so lucky to have such an incredible Grandmother! Good luck on your move!

      Mary



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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Marya1961 wrote Jun 19, 2010
    • Beautiful post Suzann!..and I wish you much luck with the move.  We as moms and grandmoms live for our kids and grandkids and how blessed you will be to have them close..and Lexie and Kirby will be fine!..pretty chandelier!estaticheart



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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Dana Cappelletti wrote Jun 19, 2010
    • Suzzan  I know you will not regret your decision.  I have so many beautiful memories of my grand parents- they are priceless.

      I know your pink chandelier will be beautiful regardless of where it is.

      Congratulations.



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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Cynthia Schmidt wrote Jun 19, 2010
    • I love your blogs, Suzann. All the best to in your move, keep in touch with us as you can; we‘re here all the way.estatic



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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Suzann wrote Jun 19, 2010
    • Thanks so much, dearest FabSisters!!!



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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Mztracy wrote Jun 19, 2010
    • Love the Chandelier!!heartheart

      Have fun with your new adventure. Before you know it you’ll be all done and settled!!
      heartheart



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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Frannie1964 wrote Jun 19, 2010
    • Fallow yourheart my Friend.

      Your home Is where your heart Is and being near famliy, just makes It so much better!!heart Good luck to you and your cat on your new move.

      I love the chandelier.estatic



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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Suzann wrote Jun 19, 2010
    • Thanks you guys. Yes, Frannie, you‘re so right. Following the heart. Not always the easy way, but I notice when I don’t follow my heart, my heart hurts!



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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Lazylola wrote Jun 19, 2010
    • Love it! heart



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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Kandykahne 5 wrote Jun 19, 2010
    • Love the pink chandelier! Best wishes on a safe move.happy



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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Wookiemom09 wrote Jun 19, 2010
    • Suzann - your chandelier is amazing.  It is you and can hang no matter where you “hang your hat“.  Being in your grandkids life will be be worth it.  They will remember you in their growing up.  We lived with my ex mother in law for 3 years and even though made me miserable alot more that I cared; she was golden to my son.  He remembers the special breakfasts they shared when I slept in, the cookie jar in her room that always had oreos for him when he wanted them, enjoying football games in her lap and she never yelled at him (that he remembers LOL).  We moved out when he was 6 and she died about 2 years later.  Memories he never would have had if we hadn’t lived there.



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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Denise Richardson wrote Jun 20, 2010
    • Suzann,  


      I love the pink chanderlier, and do you! Who cares about what anyone else may think this is your place and your own private spot in the universe, live you life girl!



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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Vikki Hall wrote Jun 20, 2010
    • I can’t wait to see your beautiful pink chandi hanging in an equally beautiful new home. Just think about the wonderful glow it will cast on the visits with the babieshappy



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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Suzann wrote Jun 21, 2010
    • Wookiemom, what a wonderful memory your son will always have. That’s an incredible story.

      Vikki, Lola, Dianna - thank you so much!

      Neicy - that’s it! It’s got to be, I’m getting too old to not “get” that we can’t care so much what others think of us. And wow, I love your graphics, too, especially the little penguin.



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