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I walked into the house the other day and my youngest child, Cassie was reading a book.   Being instantly proud of the wisdom of my 20 year old daughter to be reading rather than remoting the various reality shows which require only an IQ in the double digits, my heart swelled with pride.

On further examination, turns out the book she was reading was called, "The Memory Bible".

I said, "What's that about?"  She said, "I'm worried about getting Alzheimer's, and this book is teaching me how to keep my memory."

Oh no, here we go again with Cassie's neurosis about her health.  Lorraine, do you remember when she was in high school and she sent me an urgent text message telling me she needed a HEART SCAN ASAP as she was sure she had clogged arteries?  Or the time she needed an emergency dermatology appointment because she was sure her birthmark was really deadly melanoma in disguise?


So, after I spent a large amount of time trying to convince Cassie there was nothing to be concerned about, the next day, Brent, the 25 year-old sends me an article about how to prevent Alzheimer's.

Is there a message here?  Fine, I admit it.  My mother had Alzheimer's, two of her sisters have or had Alzheimer's, her father had it.  Why am I not paranoid or neurotic about this?

I asked my son if he was worried about my memory.  He assured me he wasn't, just that he was worried about my brothers and sisters.  Sounds like a cover up to me.

So, all this is backlash from my 30's when I was neurotic and had self-Munchausen's disorder when I was sure the tingling in my feet (a result of my addictive overuse of  Stairmaster's) was being caused by a spinal cord tumor that was going to kill me at any minute.  

It's one thing to be a silent neurotic—I mean when you're a mom, you need to keep the duct tape handy and keep these premonitions of doom to yourself.  But NO, NOT ME, I had to SHARE this with my young impressionable children at the dinner table with outbursts like,  "I'm going to die of a spinal cord tumor!"

Dave should have committed me then and there before I passed on the "there's something wrong with me" phobias.

And why don't I ever obsess and worry about Alzheimer's given my family history?

All I think about are the worry wrinkle lines between my eyes and how I can save enough money for the next Botox treatment.

Talk about denial!  Is there some clinical name for people who worry about things they shouldn't and don't worry about things they should!

Lorraine, don't say a word.  Just leave me alone to keep company with my denial and my wrinkles...



My usual heightened state of anxiety has now been kicked up a few notches after reading your blog.

I had been sailing along with only a few worries doing their merry-go-round in my mind but now just being reminded of all there is to worry about....I'm a nervous wreck!!  I might have to make a mad dash to either my medicine cabinet, my yoga mat or to my cupboard for some chamomile tea.  It's Armageddon no doubt!!

Who knows if we pass the anxiety gene through our DNA or if it is just learned by sitting at the dinner table hearing our neurotic nervous parents blurt out their concerns and challenges...we unknowingly load our kids up with our own angst and then fret when we see them fretful.

I hope Cassie realizes she is a LONG way from the possibility of Alzheimer's and I can wring our hands about that disease for sure, along with world peace or lack of, mandated fluorescent light bulbs that might give us all migraine headaches and cloned food showing up at the grocery store without anyone letting us know.

Today is the tomorrow we worried about yesterday.  ~Author Unknown

....what exactly does that mean??  Now I am REALLY worried!!



Member Comments

    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Yana Berlin wrote Jun 2, 2008
    • Sounds like Casey should become a doctor, why waste all of the paranoia without putting it to use?

      I have a friend who while in Med School diagnosed himself with the “decease of the week“, he identified with everything they learned about and was always convinced he had it.

      20 years later, he is still paranoid and neurotic, but at least he is making a lot of money and enjoying his expertise as an anesthesiologist .

            Report  Reply

    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Mary Kelly-Williams, M.A. wrote Jun 4, 2008
    • Yes, the ole freshmanitis of those in medical school.  They are all convinced they have whatever they‘re studying about.

      And you make a good point...he could be pennyless and paranoid and neurotic, or a wealthy paranoid neurotic.  At least he has the money for therapy if he wants it!


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