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Yesterday I buried my mother!  Despite this fact it was a very nice day...even with the cloudiness and misty rain here and there.  It was a good day!

My mother’s name was Betty.  She lived 83 years...12 of them with a horrible disease called alzheimers.  She has suffered enough and was so ready to be set free of the bondage. She spoke at times about wanting to go home and see her Mama and Daddy.  They both passed away in the very early 70’s.  

Saturday morning about 3:30am we received a call that she had turned for the worse.  We rushed to the nursing home to find her breathing to be labored and some other vitals to be declining.  At this point my sisters and I decided that we would all take turns staying with her so she would never be alone.  

I noticed Saturday afternoon after weeks of not opening her eyes...being very unresponsive...she opened both eyes as wide as they would go.  Something she had not really done in months.  She stared straight up to the ceiling...the labored breathing had subsided, and she was blinking her eyes like you and I would do when listening to someone.  I called her name but she was totally ignoring me but whoever had her attention....had it fully.  It was like someone was telling her something VERY important...and she was listening to them with great intense.  She stayed this way for about a minute and then slowly closed her eyes again for good.  It was an amazing event and I felt so privileged to have witnessed it.  What do I think was happening?  I truly believe God was telling her it was okay to let go...and that she would be there soon. Some people might disagree with me and say oh that is what people who are dying usually do...well maybe so...but I do believe God was speaking to her.  

She passed away on late Monday afternoon and it was so peaceful.  As I watched her take her last breath I stood their wondering....who is she seeing first?  Who is waiting for her?  I actually felt a little jealousy.    

The amazing caregivers at the nursing home where she resided for four years were so sweet to her.  They all came and paid their respects to her...kissed her...and told her they loved her.  It was very touching. We are so grateful for all of their help over the past four years.  They took excellent care of her and we would have nothing but the best for our dear mother.

Today I am not sad. I am so happy for my mother.  She is in heaven with my Father, her parents, her siblings and friends....that I know she is having a big party up in heaven. She is finally free!!  

Today is the beginning of a new year...new beginnings for me and my mother...life is good again!  I’m so excited about all the possibilities and adventures that await for me.  

Thank you Mother for being the best mother anyone could have!  My sisters and I were so blessed to have you as our mother.  I love you!

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Member Comments

    • +1 votes vote up vote up

      Cynthia Schmidt wrote Jan 1, 2010
    • Oh, Mary, I have goosebumps after reading your blog. I know in my heart of hearts that the pain of losing her is blended well with the knowledge that she is in heaven, she feels no discomfort, she recognizes everyone around her and she is laughing and smiling with the joy of a child. You’ve been through a lot this past many years and you’ve been a loving daughter through her illness. Bless you and your family and may God give you comfort and peace.



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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Lazylola wrote Jan 1, 2010
    • Mary, my deepest sympathy for your loss of your beloved mother, thank you for sharing this with us, how beautiful your words in describing her last moments. To new beginnings.



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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Saray60 wrote Jan 1, 2010
    • Mary, your words touched me and reminded me of how I felt when my father passed away last February. I flew back to Malaysia to see him and was appalled to see how frail he had become! He was in so much pain and I told him that i loved him and asked him to let go and walk into Jesus’ arms... About 10 hours later,the hospital called to say that daddy had passed away. It hurt so much because I couldn’t see him alive again and it was unbearable when  they finally covered up the coffin and sealed it. As painful as it was, I also rejoiced as I knew where he was. I knew he was happy - no more pain or sense of hopelessness. My heartfelt condolence for your loss but I rejoice with you as mama is smiling and happy.
      Have a very blessed new Year filled with new beginnings and adventures, great joy and peace within.



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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Karyn Olson wrote Jan 2, 2010
    • So sorry for your loss...your post really was touching and I could feel the love you have for her come through...happy



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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Mz. Queen wrote Jan 2, 2010
    • I am in complete agreement with your spiritual outlook on your mother’s passing.

       Here’s to a new year and new beginnings!

      love D47



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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Linni wrote Jan 2, 2010
    • Oh Mary! how beautiful!  

      i was with my daddy when he passed away 16 years ago.. i know what you went through... i too think that God was talking to your momma..
      God bless you my friend!



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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Mary Clark wrote Jan 3, 2010
    • Thanks everyone!  Your words are all very kind and I certainly do appreciate it.



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