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I am feeling very sad just now and I want to get out of the house and have some me time with a friend. Maybe see a movie or just lime. Never thought at this age I would not know how to do this as I am not able to identify one single girl friend that has anytime for  me.  

Recently I have been trying to pay more attention to myself. I have been doing my hair and nails. I have taken a vacation bought new clothes and dressing differently. I have even had a few massages. But even though my hubby is home we have not been going out so there is no where to wear the new clothes to but work and the supermarket.  

I think I know where I have gone wrong. Since getting married I have been too busy with my family life that I been stucked in this time zone that has aged me and life has just been passing me by. Even if I did find a friend to go some where with. Where would we go? I wish all of what I know now I had know sooner. I would not be in this confused and sorrowful state.

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Member Comments

    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Vikki Hall wrote Apr 15, 2011
    • I am so sorry that your sad and in this spot. I know when I moved away from all that was known and loved I too was lonely. I fortunately found Fab40 and they offered me resources. Such as friendship, amusement and what has been the most valuable to me has been knowing that I wasn’t alone in all this. They also gave me ideas on where to look: volunteer, gym membership, newneighbors.org, meetups.com.

      I also had to be ok with me and be ok with being alone. I can’t say that I have a lot of local friends yet but I am in a better spot than I was. And keep in mind that at our age it is harder to build those life long friendships (someone on here blogged about that) and when your kids are grown it’s even harder.



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    • +1 votes vote up vote up

      Mysticalpatterns wrote Apr 15, 2011
    • I’m right there with you... :)  I always blame it on moving so much (military family).  In part this is true.  But I too have spent so much focus on my home & family that I haven’t made an effort to create friendships.

      When you live on a military installation it is sort of an expectation that you get out & meet your neighbors.  It is easy to strike up a conversation at the park or just knocking on a new neighbors door (there are always new neighbors) but when we moved here a few years ago we thought we were going to retire & bought a house.  It is a whole different world.  I ‘know’ my neighbors but not enough to go to lunch or go shopping with.  I have tried the ‘military’ approach, just being friendly or striking up a conversation but most of our neighbors have lived here for 15 to 20 years and are well established in their ‘friends‘.  

      I have an amazing BFF but she lives 12 hrs from me and we talk on the phone all the time, and she gives me all the emotional support I could ever want.  But I don’t have a friend to just hang out with, or to go to lunch/go shopping with.  That is something I miss dearly.  I have tried places like Meetup.com or other similar sites but we don’t live in a large area and finding someone to connect with hasn’t been that easy.

      Luckily for me my teen daughters are a great source of companionship.  They really have been a blessing when my husband is gone for months at a time (15 months the last time).  But I still miss that connection you can only get from a ‘partner in crime’ sort of speak.

      Love, Light & Blessings,
      heart Miss T heart

      “It’s Never to Late to Become What You Might Have Been” - George Elliot



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    • +2 votes vote up vote up

      Rose Nino wrote Apr 15, 2011
    • Don’t be sad. I remember I felt the same way & so lonely when I first moved away and had to leave my job, family, and friends behind and start over. I was also extremly shy & quiet. So making friends didn’t come easily. And I alsoknow it was hard for me because I didn’t feel well physically and it affected me emotionally. Hang in there and know that things are bound to change. As Vikki said, get out and volunteer, join a gym, etc. It’s what I did and lucky for me, I met an amazing lady that gave me the gift of health and my life back. Now I love helping others feel the same by paying it forward. And remember you always have us here at Fab40!  

      Hugz heartestatic



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    • +1 votes vote up vote up

      Denise Richardson wrote Apr 15, 2011
    • (((Lady V))) I know how you feel because I have found that as I have aged further into maturity I found myself deleting some people from my circle, and I'm good with it all I don't need a lot of people around me though I am a people person I make their world go round (meaning)I'm the life of the party and their advisor so to speak, but anyhow, girrrrrrrrrrrrrl you better pop a cork on a bottle of wine or whatever floats your boat pull up a chair and spend time here with us I tell you we have a great time here and most time for me like today I had been on Fab from early around 8-ish until I logged off to run to the doctors. We are or shall I speak for myself lol, am addicted to Fab40 because we have so much going on here and we have fun. There are lots of laughs, tears, advice, truth and just plain ole good times here so never feel as though you're alone we're here for you. I know its different than having a physical body but girl please there have been times on here where I felt like the ladies were right here in the same room with me especially when we used to have our cyber parties boy oh boy lol!!!! But anyhow I hope we all can cheer you up so pull up a chair and pour that glass of bubbly and enjoy yourself with us.happyxoxo



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    • +1 votes vote up vote up

      Diane17 wrote Apr 15, 2011
    • I have felt the same way before.  My hubby and I rarely go out too because it costs a FORTUNE by the time we go out and pay the babysitter and he’s a homebody. frown

      But when we moved out here to the country which was far away from my friends, I joined a club and met some people that way.  It’s a MOMS Club and aside from playdate and kids activities, the moms get together once a month and do something fun without the kids.  If it wasn’t for them, I wouldn’t have any friends in the area.  Now my long-distance friends, I talk to periodically and we try to get together several times a year for dinner.

      I think the other ladies who posted here had good suggestions too.



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    • +1 votes vote up vote up

      Cheekymonkey wrote Apr 15, 2011
    • My mz v, dont u live in California??? And if I’m remembering correctly I would love to go see a movie , lunch date then shopping..... I think we ate about an hour to hour and a half.
      I’m sorry your in a low place right now and it’s hard when our lives cycle different from our friends. Mine also is doing that. I get it.
      Come take Niecys advice and grab a bottle of good wine or bubbly and sit with us!!! We need niecy to throw a music party again !!!!
      Hugs
      Cris



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    • +1 votes vote up vote up

      Anne E wrote Apr 16, 2011
    • Wow- I hear ya! It’s harder to make good friends as we get older. Don’t be discouraged, keep on trying, and in the mean time, know we are here for you heart



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    • +1 votes vote up vote up

      Samirah wrote Apr 16, 2011
    • I’m sure you got some great advice from the women here. I have been there a time or two myself and honestly I think it is easier to fix than you might think. Call up someone you find interesting and just ask them out for coffee or a walk. You never know who may be feeling the same way as yourself. Invite your husband out too...make him go with you to a nice dinner and a movie or something. Sometimes its as easy as just speaking up. Online friendships are great but there is nothing like the RL ones to hang out with and get out of the house. It is easy to get into that family rut but just like you recognized that you fell into it, get out of it!
      Good luck!estatic



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    • +1 votes vote up vote up

      Msj wrote Apr 16, 2011
    • I second All of these comments!  

      What a FABULOUS group we have!  Blog it, post it, ask a question just for fun!

      Welcome!



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    • +1 votes vote up vote up

      Mztracy wrote Apr 16, 2011
    • heartheart



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    • +1 votes vote up vote up

      Victorious wrote Apr 17, 2011
    • Thanks guys for your advise....I will need to invest in a laptop and a comfortable recliner chair for my bed room soon. I have a hard time sitting up over 15 min at the desk top computer I have because of my back issues.heart



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