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Going with my 1st day of meditation...

Perfection ~ The Language of Letting Go, May 11

Many of us picked on ourselves unmercifully.  We my also have a tendency to pick on ourselves after we begin making changes for ourselves.

~  If I was really serious, I wouldn’t be doing that again...
~  I should be further along than I am...

These are statements that we indulge in when we‘re felling shame.  We don’t need to treat ourselves that way.  There is no benefit.

Remember, shame blocks us.  But self-love and acceptance enable us to grow and change.  If we truly have done something we feel guilty about, we can correct it with an amend and an attitude of self-acceptance and love.

Even if we slip back to our old, codependent ways of thinking, feeling and behaving, we do not need to be ashamed.  We all regress from time to time.  That’s how we learn and grow.  Relapse or recycling, is an important and necessary part of change.  And the way out of recycling is not by shaming ourselves.  That leads us deeper into codependency.

Much pain comes from trying to be perfect.  Perfection is impossible unless we think of it in a new way:  Perfection is being who and where we are today;  it’s accepting and loving ourselves just as we are.  We are each right where we need to be.

Today, I will love and accept myself for who I am and where I am in my process. I am right where I need to be to get where I am going tomorrow.

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Member Comments

    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Vikki Hall wrote May 11, 2010
    • This is a really good blog!!!!

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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Suzann wrote May 12, 2010
    • Very helpful, great reminders, very perceptive. I just love what you had to say. Especially “Relapse or recycling, is an important and necessary part of change.  And the way out of recycling is not by shaming ourselves.  That leads us deeper into codependency.” That just struck a chord with me.  

      I’ve found making amends to be one way of getting past guilt. It almost doesn’t matter whether the other person accepts or forgives or ignores, or whatever the other person does. I know I’ve done the best I could. And that somehow signals my heart that I can let go of that guilt.  

      You comments about perfection are good, too. To expect to be perfect, gosh, we‘re just setting ourselves up for failure!

      Good job! Thank you for the insight.

      [Link Removed] 

      Suzann, Your links have been removed, please consider upgrading to premium membership.

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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Veggie wrote May 12, 2010
    • So glad you enjoyed this Vikki & Suzann!  I also got a lot out of it.  And along with meditating for my 15 minutes yesterday, what a great day I had!

      So glad you suggested the meditation, Vikki!

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