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My boyfriend & I got into a huge fight last night & he walked out.  I'm thinking he walked out because he didn't want to fight.  But who knows he might have walked out of the relationship.  In either case I haven't heard from him & I'm sure as heck not going to call him.  I'm sitting here trying to think of what I'm going to say if/when he calls.  Did I do something wrong that I need to apologize for?  If I did I'm being too stubborn/blind to see it.  This is where I need your help.
Some history – We've been together 6 years. We seem to always be one the same page & rarely argue. If I get upset over something, I write it in a letter or email & send it to him. (By this point he already knows something is up & is afraid to ask.) He calls me & gets to the point of the matter & puts my mind at ease for whatever is bothering me & we move on with life.
Last July his brother was unexpectedly killed. I stood by him & helped his family get through it. In December/January his sister-in-law found a boyfriend which upset him to no end. He felt his brother was being replaced. I helped him & his parents through that. In February one of his very good friends who also worked for him quit & decided to start his own company to directly compete against my boyfriend. He's even trying to steal my boyfriend's customers. It's been two months & the former employee/friend is failing miserably. He's even asked my boyfriend if he can come back & was told no. My boyfriend really misses his lost friend & admitted that one day he'll take him back as a friend but never as an employee. I've helped him deal with that loss.
In the meantime, I'm working on a project at work that supposedly is so important that the management team might get fired if we're not successful. If that isn't stressful I don't know what is. My house is falling apart. I need a new roof but I'm so maxed out debt wise that I can't afford it right now. I just now got my budget in order so that I can hopefully save the money to get a new roof. However my insurance company is thinking about leaving Florida & I just found out that no insurance company will pick me up without a roof inspection. This sucks! However I don't share much of this with my boyfriend because he's got his own issues that he needs to deal with. He doesn't need to hear my problems as well.
So yesterday we get into an argument over something stupid & he leaves.  I let him go.  I didn't run after him.  I haven't called him.  How long do I let this go on before I pack up his things that are at my house & drop them off at his parents?  A week?  I'm hoping he calls & we patch things up.  However what am I going to say if he does?  I'm sorry?  For what?  And why am I not crying over the fact that he walked out on me yesterday?  Because I know he'll eventually come back?  (I read somewhere that men need their space to think.  When they start to miss us, they'll come back more committed than before.)  Shouldn't I be feeling more than this?



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Member Comments

    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      UK Girl wrote Apr 13, 2009
    • Hey honey - you have been a great friend and girlfriend - I think the reason your not crying and posting is this you think enough is enough and you’ve had it ....

      Sorry about your work stress and the roof - it sounds like you’ve had a pile of stress and don’t need his as well.



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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      (華娃娃) ChinaDoll wrote Apr 13, 2009
    • I think both of you are dealing with much stress lately.  I can understand you do not want to bombard him with your own personal issues.  However, I don’t think that is fare.  You too just need a break from each other for now.  By reading line by line, I see that you do care for him.  Don’t assume, don’t plan on what you are going to say or going to do, let the nature takes its course.  We are adult and we need not to act like kids though we have one in all of us.  (I hope you don’t mind me saying that).  Take care of yourself - relax and you can think and see clearly.



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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      UK Girl wrote Apr 14, 2009
    • Glad things are okay honey ...... be strong for yourself



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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Mjmurphy wrote Apr 14, 2009
    • I think he walked out because it sounds like you two don’t talk face to face when there is a problem



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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Bluerose wrote Apr 20, 2009
    • To follow-up ... all of you ladies are right.  He called back & apologized.  We didn’t talk a whole lot during the week do due work, kids, etc.  However we spent this weekend together.  He apologized profusely & turns out he had spent the week trying to find a roofer that I can afford.  I told him he needed to do whatever he had to to get his head on straight.  Week at the hunting camp, night out with the boys, whatever.  He knows it.  But now that he realized he may lose me over it (or so he thinks, truth is I’m in this for the long haul) he’s going to make more of an effort to get his head right.



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