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Much of social contact and communication is maintained virtually in this day and age. Many people prefer quickly texting by phone, messaging via Facebook + Twitter, and good ol’ fashion email.  

In surveys conducted by Shape and Men’s Fitness magazines, a group of 1,200 men and women provided reports about their social and sex lives and how the two come together.  

While texting remains the number one way lovers keep in touch, nearly 80 percent of women and 60 percent of men believe social media tools lead to sex much faster than more orthodox meet and greet mediums. When starting a new relationship, over 60 percent of both genders said they use Google and other online tools and search options to do a cursory background check on a new date.  It’s also become common practice to solicit dates and end relationships over text messaging or the web.  

Many people report that after a relationship ends, they will remain Facebook friends with their ex and even check up on them frequently.

Really? Why? Who would want to have their "X" lurking on them?

Do you lurk and/or know you‘re being watched by an ex?

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Member Comments

    • +3 votes vote up vote up

      Angye wrote Mar 3, 2011
    • I believe that an ex is a ex for something and at least for me, Im spaniard, its over. I just turn the page and look for new friends.
      Texting is a good way to keep in touch in a very private way and dont glue to a phone or wait a call.
      In anyway is always nice to know that somebody is there for you



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    • +1 votes vote up vote up

      Vikki Hall wrote Mar 3, 2011
    • Wow!

      While I am friendly with my ex husband I am not friends with him on FB. His sister, mom and others I am but not him.

      No lurking here on my part.... And how awful to have a break up thru text. Where’s the closure????



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    • +1 votes vote up vote up

      Mapiel wrote Mar 3, 2011
    • I live in a metro area so I guess I am lucky that once a relationship ends, I do not run into him, which makes it easier to move on.  I thinks if you‘re having a hard time moving on, technology now makes it harder to do, since it’s so easy to find out what he is up to, specially if he is into facebook.
      I truly believe distance is the best thing to get over someone.
      I amazes me how some people like to put everything on it, I am very private and there is some info I would only share with someone I trust and person to person, not to the world -World Wide Web!



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    • +1 votes vote up vote up

      UK Girl wrote Mar 3, 2011
    • I belong in the school of once it’s over it’s over ....I would never be friends on Facebook etc
      The funny/ sad bit is my daughters father and I were great friends and remained so I’m now a Like on his Facebook page as he has died and was well known in our home town so there are tribute pages to him ...... he would have found that funny as he hated Facebook !



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    • +1 votes vote up vote up

      Mztracy wrote Mar 3, 2011
    • TY Eva!! My good friend’s hubby is leaving her for his ‘first’ ex wife. ASS!! I cannot wait until it comes back to bite him in the ass. And the re-connected on FB!



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    • +2 votes vote up vote up

      Cathie Beck wrote Mar 3, 2011
    • I’m not on FB, but I just can’t imagine being “friendly” with the X after all he’s done. It’s not the cheating on me and dumping me, it’s his dismissal of me like I never mattered and he’s mean. He’s an X and that is that!  

      Cathie



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    • +1 votes vote up vote up

      Angelcart wrote Mar 3, 2011
    • Vicki I’m with you, when it’s over it’s over.  Period.



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    • +1 votes vote up vote up

      Tuliplady wrote Mar 3, 2011
    • An ex is an ex and therefore, history.  He would have no part of my present whether on fb or anywhere else.



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    • +1 votes vote up vote up

      Mj71 wrote Mar 3, 2011
    • No. once it’s over, it’s over!tongue out



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    • +1 votes vote up vote up

      Anne E wrote Mar 3, 2011
    • I don’t understand it when people have hundreds of Facebook “friends“.  Unless someone’s on my Christmas card list or I see/e-mail them privately, I wouldn’t Facebook them.  No exes, except in rare instances.

      Yana, the part about earlier sex made me feel sad for all the people who experience pain because of it or think a relationship is deeper than it it.



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    • +1 votes vote up vote up

      Marya1961 wrote Mar 4, 2011
    • First, not a big fan of FB..many friends and family have encouraged me to get on there..nope!  I am still of the old school whereby a phone call and a visit to people’s homes are my thing..e-mails are great if someone is long distance and you need to send a note.

      Second, I would never re-kindle an old relationship in any way..either e-mail, regular mail, phone calls, social networks, texts..it can create problems, as Tracy indicated with her friend...and do you notice that people barely say hello to each other anymore in public, very sad, but the cell phone is glued to their ear and fingers!



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    • +1 votes vote up vote up

      Cathie Beck wrote Mar 4, 2011
    • Yeah, Mary! I got some pressure to sign up for FB too, but forget it! I have a telephone I pay for, please use it to call me. ;oD  

      Cathie



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    • +1 votes vote up vote up

      Anonymous wrote Mar 4, 2011
    • I recently reconnected with an ex on FB but we are both married and have families and have definitely “moved on“.  If he were to try anything “funny“, I would unfriend him.



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    • +1 votes vote up vote up

      Linda L wrote Mar 5, 2011
    • I agree with Cathie.  I don’t have FB and have no interest in my ex’s life because he has no respect for me.

      I also agree with Mary.  It’s sad that so many are hooked on their cell phones.  Parents are glued to their cell as they come in to talk to the teacher about their child.



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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Pat68 wrote Mar 22, 2011
    • I agree, let the ex be an ex - finished, start over and dont look back! No need to befriend them and know what they are doing especially when there are no kids linking you!



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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Marianne Goodhead wrote Mar 25, 2011
    • Good article!  If there is a breakup, there is no way you can remain friends on FB...too much jealousy as to who is he/she talking to or friends with.



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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Plussize4you wrote Mar 29, 2011
    • For a relationship to end the decision has been made it’s over. I had an ex who would have loved to keep a foot in the door (huge ego) but I would not encourage a friendship with him as he was not worthy of my friendship. I consider a friend someone who respects your feelings and never hurt you, most ex’s don’t measure-up that is why they are just that. I would not meet for coffee or interact on facebook for me that’s crossing the line unless your single.



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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Cathie Beck wrote Mar 29, 2011
    • Just yesterday the almost X said he hoped after the divorce that I could put it behind me. I won’t have a problem with that, I’m just waiting to move on and He won’t be in my future!  

      Cathie



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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Blackfemale1953 wrote Mar 29, 2011
    • I’m on FB, but rarely comment on anything....kinda got on there because of “peer pressure.”  

      No need to deal with “ex’s“, or “formers...”  Why???



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