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Ok so as you all know who read my blog on my ordeal with my current sickness, after I was released from the hospital I went straight to my youngest daughters house and had been there for the duration of my recovery until yesterday. I came home yesterday, but it was a bitter sweet moment. My 4 year old grand daughter (Jadyn) who is so wise beyond her years is such a jewel to have around, she is so smart as well as very observant, she was so concerned about me throughout this whole ordeal even when I first went into the hospital and her mom told her where I was she immediately told her mom, "I need to go there to see my nana, so I can fix it!" She was so concerned for me from that moment on, when she first came to see me at the hospital they had all kinds of tubes and wires hanging off of me and the oxygen tube in my nose this was so frightening for her, as bad as she wanted to kiss, and hug me as we always do she was afraid she'd hurt me further and declined to do but said to me, Nana, I love you infinity times infinity, times infinity and blew me a kiss.

It brought tears to my eyes because I know her and she was so worried even at her age about me because we‘re so close. After they moved me from ICU to step down care they removed the oxygen and the heart monitor wires, so I didn’t look so scary to her and when she came to see me again she jumped right into bed with me took her shoes off and told her mom she could leave and that she would stay and take care of me lol, she is something else lol. So in that visit she share with me about thoughts of me leaving her in other words death and dying WOW!!! this kid is something she even spoke about my brother’s death who we lost last year to Prostate Cancer he was 39 yrs. old, she remembered that and said to me that she didn’t want to see me in a box meaning (casket) this kid is too much, so I assured her that God wasn’t going to take me and that I would be around for a long time, this was just a wakeup call for Nana to slow down and take better care of herself and not so much as to worry about other people and things I have no control of.

So then she tells me, “Nana I love you so much you are the best grandma ever!” and she kisses me several times she tells me she loves my kisses and love kissing me and we hug all the time, kids are so precious and we need to give them all the time and love we can while we can.
Ok so now yesterday it was time for me to pack my bags and come home, she was so upset at the fact that I had to leave she began to cry because she was getting prepared for school and I was preparing to come home she told me she didn’t want me to leave because she needed me there so she could watch over me, wow! this got to me as well as her mom and she began to cry saying Nana don’t leave me, I need to take care of you, I want you to be here when I get home from school.  

I don’t want you to go home and be by yourself Papa, won’t be there and you might fall or something! My heart was so broken to see her crying, so I held and kissed her and told her when she gets home from school on Thursday (today) she can come and spend the weekend with me and her Papa since she doesn’t have school on Fridays so she felt better, but as she and I were departing she had the saddest look on her face and she began to cry again telling me not to go, her mom called me later to tell me that she didn’t have a good day at school because she was so worried about me and shared it with her teachers lol, too much ok? I love her with everything in me, she is so sweet and caring and she is her Nana’s baby.

Well last night she called me to tell me she made a surprise for me and that she is going to bring it with her when she comes today and she sound so much better and is so excited that she can come and spend the weekend with us. Lord what would I do without her she is such a joy to have around and can be very helpful in many things she loves to help cook and clean, and even make a bed good lol. But of course her Nana teaches her these things lol. But her mom spends a lot of time baking and she learns from her as well, but overall she is one well rounded little 4 year old too wise for her years and I thank God that she is mine.estatichappyheartheartheart

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