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It is so very hard for me to smile. .when I am hurting so

deeply that I want to break down and cry  

buckets and buckets of tears.

Yet I know that this is what God would want: that I  

smile and give good words and good deeds even while

my world inside is turned upside down.

If I find I cannot smile then I will retreat into my little

quite world and give myself the long cry I need to go on;)

Hope it’s ok to cry as I have done plenty of this in my

long life;) I find that after a good downpour of tears

that I can see so much better.

Joy




Member Comments

    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Tammy Wallace wrote Feb 23, 2011
    • I have cried so many tears in the past 20 years. It’s ok to cry and it’s ok to keep that smile on your face, but try to do your very best in sharing your story with us. There is no need to keep it in. We are not here to judge, we are here to help...



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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Joy Pachowicz wrote Feb 23, 2011
    • Hi Tammy .. I would love to share.. as I think in sharing it gives healing. I appreciate your kind words: Jhearty



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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Tammy Wallace wrote Feb 23, 2011
    • Anytime...It would probrally take a year for me to tell of all the mishaps in my life. But here...I feel like I’m writing my book of life and I don’t have to worry for the first time in my life what anyone thinks, it comes naturally for me and the responses are genuine...There are so many woman out there with story’s to be told. I believe that this is the place, it’s our “serenity” to be who we truly are and to truly get the answers we need to hear. Noone is here to judge. We just need to be heard. I’ve cried so many tears, I put on that “excuse my language” f‘ing smile so many times that I have lost count, but there comes the day that it’s not acceptable anymore, that you need to be heard and your feelings to be counted and to say no to the negative things that happen in your life. Life is so precious, so many moments lost that we can never get back. Take a deep breath and enjoy these moments...



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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Joy Pachowicz wrote Feb 23, 2011
    • Tracy;

      Thanks for sharing.. I love how you write.

      I am a person who if opened up would probably shock  

      people to know everythng  

      BUt  I am not here to seek pity.

      I  am here to learn and share.

      I am learning to let some words just fly  

      right on over my head.. :)  

      JOY



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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Tammy Wallace wrote Feb 23, 2011
    • Thank you...No pity, just opinions...I’m learning every day to let words go over my head too :) Baby steps my friend :)



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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Joy Pachowicz wrote Feb 23, 2011
    • Sorry for saying Tracy.. Meant Tammy:  

      I am learning that if I let mean word soak in

      I become more broken and I am already so broken  

      from what happen to me in NJ..  

      So I can’t afford to become stressed any more

      I have to keep kind words ready and  

      and turn difficulties around to victories.

      Joy



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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Tammy Wallace wrote Feb 23, 2011
    • ahhhh NJ Things happened to me in Jersey...let it roll, take deep breathes and say this too shall pass..say it a million times until the thought that is consuming goes away



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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Joy Pachowicz wrote Feb 23, 2011
    • Well mine is not so easily let go..as there a many  

      things involved.. there is legal matters .. and  

      I am now getting help for ptsd due to what happened.

      but I cannot breathe freely till it is all done ..

      Joy



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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Joy Pachowicz wrote Feb 23, 2011
    • PTSD is Post Traumatic Stress Disorder..Normally its associated with soldier..people gone through war.. I guess I experience some very traumatic things. so I went thru my own war and now am trying to healworried

      JhappyY



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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Tammy Wallace wrote Feb 23, 2011
    • I too am healing from PTSD from one incident that happened to me a little over a year ago. I have to take back my life. I can’t be consumed by the past. It took almost a year to get over my injuries from a person who I truly believed in. My first and only experience with domestic violence. I will never have full use of my hand, but I will not allow one incident to take one more precious moment of my time.



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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Joy Pachowicz wrote Feb 23, 2011
    • I am sorry .. to hear that.. It’s a terrible thing but we can make it through.. I lost so much . due to the nature of what happened I am still legally in a case with the former employer..

      I am sorry you lost use of your hand. .I would suppose that injury is not as painful as what’s inside;)

      It’s ok to say it hurts.. as that is human.

      Joy



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