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The tables have really turned over the course of 50 years in the American workforce. Most households rely on two incomes to sustain a certain standard of living, and in fact, it has become more common for the lady of the house to be the major contributor.

This trend promises to be a growing theme with the majority of college graduates being female and steadily taking over the higher paying professional careers that were traditionally male-dominated (such as doctors, dentists, lawyers and entrepreneurs).  But how compatible, or incompatible is this trend with securing a steady, happy, healthy relationship with a less-accomplished man?

Many successful women in their thirties are increasingly being faced with the challenge of finding a mate who welcomes their success, power and money and does not feel threatened by such status.  This apparent inequality also makes preserving the traditional gender roles of a relationship difficult.  

What does this mean for women who have found great success by their thirties?  Is this group doomed to loneliness and the single life?  Not necessarily.

Some men are thrilled at the prospect of being supported by their mate and are even relieved to be free of the pressure to be the bread-winner like their fathers before them.  But many men find this a very uncomfortable pairing and have difficulty resigning themselves to what could be seen as second-in-command.

Recommendations for high-powered women (or up-and-coming high powered women) include looking for a mate as early on as possible, so that the relationship has a chance to be cemented before the tidal wave of success later on.  For those already advanced in their fields and positions, be subtle about your tremendous success and keep all flashy displays of wealth/status at a minimum when first dating.  Men whose egos are less-invested in their financial success and power also can make great mates, like academics or artists.  

Being a high powered, successful woman is nothing to be avoided or shunned. If anything such women should be applauded and encouraged in their endeavors.  Finding a partner requires the match be a good fit for one another regardless of who is the breadwinner within the household.

I have never been fond of the idea that a woman should be completely dependent on their significant other or vice versa for that matter. Furthermore, I have always encouraged my daughters to get the highest education possible and build a solid career for themselves. At the end of the day, it’s nice to know that whether or not your husband brings home the bacon or not, you don’t have to be completely dependent on him.  

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Member Comments

    • +1 votes vote up vote up

      Darlene Sabella wrote Jan 7, 2011
    • Excellent article my friend, yes it does take two to make it that is a fact, the only problem really seems to be the children, or children have changed and some have changed in serious ways.  The people I have met in my life that had stay at home moms/dad seem to me more respectful and more grounded as people.  More willing to be in an honest relatioship when they become adults.  However, todays kids are raising each other and this is our problem.  However, I loved to work, and I was very success orinanted in my goals.  Great work on this subject and I love you my friend, thumbs up. Love & peace Darskiheart



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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Anne E wrote Jan 7, 2011
    • i don’t know many “tremendously successful” women.  One woman Director I met has a house husband to take care of their children because she works such long hours and isn’t available to go to school events, soccer games, etc.  Didn’t sound too good to me.



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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Cheekymonkey wrote Jan 7, 2011
    • heartheart Yana, wonderful post. I have done the same with my daughter. “be all u can” I want her to be strong, independant and an equal partner in her relationships and life



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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Plussize4you wrote Jan 8, 2011
    • Great article Yana

      Both sides to the coin

      I never had many options growing up as there were five of us (children) and mum and dad struggled at time’s to provide for us all. My parents attended all our sporting events and gave us all what I feel was most important growing up “their time“.



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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Marya1961 wrote Jan 8, 2011
    • Good post Yana!...I know both types of women, those who are the major breadwinners and those who have been stay at home moms, and to be honest, the ones who carry the load are really stressed out, have developed health issues, and generally can’t wait to retire, so I guess it depends on the woman and what type of profession she is in..and the stay at home moms have decided to invest in home businesses and love it.estatic



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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      UK Girl wrote Jan 9, 2011
    • Good post Yana



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    • +1 votes vote up vote up

      Tuliplady wrote Jan 9, 2011
    • I’ve raised three daughters to be independent and hard working.  The two older ones are established in their careers, support themselves and have no need financially to have a man in their life. I guess you’d call them successful. I think that kind of independence does intimidate men their own age.  What I’m seeing is that none of them have any interest in guys their own age because the men are too imature.  More mature men seem better able to deal with successful women.



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