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While going though old files in his home office my fiancé found the wedding band he bought for his self when he wed his former wife. It had been missing for 10+ years and he thought she took it. Now he mentioned that because he bought it and she didn't instead of us purchasing a new ring for him when we get married that May, that it would be expectable to use this ring again. I am having a problem with this and have been considering on going out today too buy him a new ring as a valentine gift. What are your thought about the exchange and meaning of the wedding rings?
History of Wedding Rings and Bands
The wedding ring on a hand of a person symbolizes the person is in husband and wife relationship. This symbol and tradition has a long far back history. It started with ancient Egyptians, seeing the circular band (today's wedding ring) representing eternity and love, endless devotion, with no beginning and no end. Even the ring hole has the meaning of a door to events known and unknown for two committed to each other .



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Member Comments

    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      3sa wrote Feb 13, 2009
    • The symbolism would be the same if it was a bubble gum machine ring.  However, my thoughts are when he looks at the ring who will he think of first?  You or his ex?  I would buy him a ring and have words inscribed on the inside to make it personal, you name or your wedding date.



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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      (華娃娃) ChinaDoll wrote Feb 13, 2009
    • How about bringing that to the Jeweler and exchange to something new so you feel comfortable about that.



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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Marionjayne wrote Feb 13, 2009
    • 3sa, Thank you... I agree it’s the thought that counts. Having it engraved is a great idea.  

      CD, This will be a surprise to him however I will suggest that to him when we select my band.



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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Denise Richardson wrote Feb 13, 2009
    • These days, many people take wedding bands and engagement rings for granted, and although they give these beautiful items of jewellery with integrity and love, they are often given with no real knowledge of the meaning behind them.

      Both wedding bands and engagement rings are very special items of jewellery; in fact, they are more than just jewellery - they are the symbols of many emotions and promises such as:

      Love
      Commitment
      Fidelity
      Eternity
      Honour  

      But where - and why - did these popular and sentimental pieces of jewellery stem from?

      The History Of Wedding Bands

      These items of jewellery have a history that spans many centuries and passes through many countries from all around the planet. Below, you will find a brief history of the wedding and engagement ring, as reported from country to country.

      EGYPTIANS

      The now-famous wedding band is thought to have originated in Ancient Egypt, where it is said that plant sections were fashioned in to circles to signify never-ending and immortal love. It was thought that the fourth finger (which we now know as the ring finger) contained a special vein that was connected directly to the heart, and therefore this became the official finger for the wedding band.

      ROMANS

      The Romans also agreed with the Egyptians with regards to the wedding ring finger and its meaning, but rather than offering wedding bands as a symbol of love, they awarded them as a symbol of ownership. Roman men would “claim” their woman with the giving of a ring.

      ASIANS / ARABS

      Puzzle rings were a complex type of jewellery that were once popular in Asia, and these jewels had the charming knack of being able to fall apart and put back together again - if you knew how to do this, of course. Wealthy Middle Eastern men then began to use these rings as wedding bands for their wives, who were often forced to wear a puzzle ring when their husband was away. The husband would know upon his return whether any of his wives had been disloyal by removing the ring whilst he was away, because the ring was designed to collapse upon removal and could only be put together again if you had the skill and knowledge required.

      EUROPEANS

      Several centuries ago, the Europeans became rather taken with what we would class as an engagement ring, but was then called a Poesy Ring. This ring was given to a loved one as a form of promise, and signified fidelity and love. The Poesy Ring was offered as a pledge of eternal togetherness, much as today’s engagement rings are offered as a promise of eternal marriage.

      AMERICANS

      During Colonial times, all items of jewellery in America were prohibited due to their apparent moral worthlessness. Instead, a more practical thimble was given as a token of love and as a pledge of eternal togetherness. However, after they were married, the women tended to remove the bottom of their “engagement thimble” to form a type of ring.

      History Of Engagement Rings

      The engagement ring of today also has its own varied and interesting history, some of which is explored below. Engagement rings have been known by many different names, have symbolised a variety of different things and have not always been made of precious metals and stunning gems!

      GREEKS

      The ancient Greeks are thought to have been the forerunners in the rising of the traditional engagement ring. Given as a token of care and affection, the rings used by the Greeks were known as betrothal rings and were given before marriage. However, the giving of these rings was not always a pre-requisite to marriage and was often given in the same way as a friendship ring might be given today.

      ROMANS

      As seen by their use of the wedding ring, ancient Romans weren’t the most sentimental of people, and the early version of their “engagement ring” were thought to have carved keys on them. It has been debated that this could have been to symbolise the woman’s right to access and own half of everything following marriage. However, the more sentimental like to think that the key may have been a key to her husband’s heart.

      ROYALTY AND THE AFFLUENT

      Engagement rings as we know them today - stunning gems encased in precious metals - became popular in around the fourteenth or fifteenth century, when the affluent and the royals began to exchange and wear these jewels. However, these items were so expensive that nobody other than the royals and the rich could afford to exchange them. It was to be many centuries before these engagement rings would become more popular or traditional.

      Why a ring?

      The purpose of engagement rings and wedding bands is to convey deep emotions of eternal love, eternal happiness, eternal commitment, and eternal togetherness. In fact, these rings signify eternity - between the giver and the recipient. A ring, of course, is a complete circle with no break and no end or beginning, which means that it just goes on and on - it is eternal.

      And, since folklore has it that the fourth finger of the left hand has a vein leading directly to the heart, it is only natural that both engagement and wedding rings would be worn on this particular finger, which was once reputed to be a direct route to the heart.

      Summary

      In short, it is clear that the giving of a ring in honour of a union, betrothal, and marriage has been going on since ancient times, and although it may not always have been as glamorous and romantic as it is today, it was still a way of exchanging a contract of betrothal or marriage.

      Thankfully, today’s wedding bands and engagement rings are not made of hair, grass, plants or twine as they may have been in ancient times, but of beautiful metals set with stunning gems, such as platinum, titanium, white gold, gold, sapphires, diamonds, rubies and emeralds. These incredible items of jewellery are likely to remain as popular as ever as the centuries go by, and even as the rest of the world advances in to a futuristic and technological age, it’s hard to imagine a day where a beautiful diamond engagement ring doesn’t melt the heart of its recipient.

      About The Author:
      Reno Charlton is an award-winning author and freelance writer from the West Midlands, England. She has written many articles providing consumer information on such topics as jewelry boxes, and promise rings.



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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Marionjayne wrote Feb 13, 2009
    • neicy, I researched this same artical. The summary sums it up!

      Summary  

      In short, it is clear that the giving of a ring in honour of a union, betrothal, and marriage has been going on since ancient times, and although it may not always have been as glamorous and romantic as it is today, it was still a way of exchanging a contract of betrothal or marriage.



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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Shopgirl1960 wrote Feb 13, 2009
    • Marion,

      I definitely think he should wear a new ring which will symbolize the love you share.



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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Onevision wrote Feb 13, 2009
    • I so agree with Neicy and thanks for all the information!



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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Marionjayne wrote Feb 13, 2009
    • When I got married to my last husband I was given a ring that was passed down to me from my Aunt. Even though that husband did not buy me the ring I would not want to wear it again starting in a new marriage. It would remind me of my former husband. I have placed it in a locked safe and plan to pass it down one day to my neice.



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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Marionjayne wrote Feb 13, 2009
    • Thanks Della, I’m going shoppin girlestatic



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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Owlmaria wrote Feb 13, 2009
    • Follow your heart. Begin anew! “Something old, something new...”



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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Trudy S wrote Feb 13, 2009
    • I agree - exchange it for a new ring for a new wife and a new life.

      My husband and I have claddagh rings. They symbolize friendship (hands), love (heart) and fidelity (crown).



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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Ms-kay wrote Feb 13, 2009
    • I understand both sides...your fiance believed since he bought it for himself - his ex has no personal sentimental attachment to it (like picking it out and purchasing it) and with you because you want him to have something new for what you share together.

      Good sound advice to engrave the ring with your own personal touch.



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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Marionjayne wrote Feb 13, 2009
    • I just got off the phone with my best friend and she suggested that my getting my fiancé a new ring might come off somewhat manipulative. That he may have suggested using this ring again because he did not want to put a financial burden on me. She recommended that I have a conversation with him explain how I feel about the meaning of the ring and to let him now that I am willing and would like to purchase him a new ring. So I plan to take her advise and have that conversation with him this weekend. Thanks again ladies for all your suggestions and comments.estatic



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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Deb Darby wrote Feb 15, 2009
    • Marionjayne. You’ve probably already had your talk, and I’m anxious to know how it turned out! I don’t blame you for wanting to be his one and only in every way. What happened, girlfriend?!



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