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Being a mother is difficult.  Being a single mother can, at times, seem impossible.  Being a single mother out of work can be devastating.  Being a single mother, out of work, and homeless can seem like the absolute end of the world... but it isn’t.  I know this, because I am one currently.

A horrific car accident while pregnant left me in a terrible position three months after beginning a new job. No benefits left me to my savings and 401k, which sustained me for a bit, but nowhere near what the litigation, pain and fending for my family could cover.

Living in a motel for nearly a month, we were finally accepted into a shelter.  My three-year-old daughter contracted lice from her friend, leaving me with the job of burning her scalp with NIX before finally rinsing and shaving her head.  This resolve wasn’t instantaneous, as I had the woman shave mine first... not that I was infected with lice, but with love and support for my daughter.  She is still having an identity crisis about whether she is female or male because of the confusion of others.

I’m learning a lot.  I’m learning who my real friends are...  the ones who support me, not monetarily, but with listening and observing.  I’m learning that the true embarrassment isn’t at all what others say to me or how they treat me, but the discomfort of watching my children fumble for answers when people ask where they live, and they have no address.  My 7-yr-olds assignment was to create a fire escape map of his home... we sleep in a church, so he carefully drew the room with the window and entry door, three air mattresses and red arrows showing where we should go.  

The end result of all this is that I feel as if I will be a failure to my children, for they are bound to remember this period.  I know, they will likely smile upon me for sticking it out... but they are children.  Children perceive things differently than adults, most times.  I’ve let myself down... because of this, quitting now would be the most devastating.  It is important to keep things moving upward and  on pace, with a smile in place.  I need to show my children that when the going gets tough, we don’t rely on credit cards, we rely on ourselves.

Maybe if everyone had to live one week of being homeless, and not knowing when it would end, people might be a little more understanding of those who truly have tried everything... who don’t stand at the roadside with a cardboard sign begging for food or money.

When my lawsuit has settled, it will not be squandered, it will be invested.  My company, Danicam Kids, will be up and going strong.  Trust me.  Thank you for your support!


Member Comments

    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Vikki Hall wrote Oct 2, 2009
    • You are a very strong woman and while your kids may fumble with the right words to use and yes they may even be embarrassed at times they will ultimately grow up to be compassionate and caring. I am sure they also look at their mother and realize that she is the woman to be emulated and admired.

      Keep on keeping on....

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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Anne E wrote Oct 2, 2009
    • So sorry you are going through this difficult time.  I know what it’s like to be an unemployed single mom rapidly running out of money.  I haven’t hit homeless yet.  One of my friends once went through some difficult times before I knew her when she was a single mom and couldn’t pay the electricity bill.  Her son, Sean, talks about how much fun it was to cook hot dogs over a candle. You seem to have a good attitude and you have that settlement money coming in to help you. Hang in there and God bless.

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