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Love it

I am sad frown

I have this love/ hate relationship with my job. I love it because its the perfect type of work for me. I hate it because no one knows me. And I feel like I am a worthless, jagged pill that they have to swallow.
But I am so much more.  

I wish that they would look at me like they would their friend.

I love the quote by Helen Keller.
I am one. But still I am one.
I will not refuse to do the things that I can.
(theres more- but I cant remember how it goes; I keep it posted right next to my desk.)

I feel like if there were 2 of me then everyone would love me. But there is just one of me and they despise me for it. Because then I have to ask for help.
Direct quote after I asked someone for help “my job is to room the patient“.

Why am I the one that has to deal with all the wrenches thrown into the spokes?
Why couldnt she help?
Why wouldnt she want to help? It was not a big job- quite simple actually.
I mean it is expected for me to do whatever I am told, whatever is asked of me- like its MY JOB requirement. Which it was not.  

I have this overwhelming desire to get so ‘in their face’ and be like oh yeh? Who do you think the doc is going to be upset with when ‘the’ job is not done. hmmm?
But I cant do it- I play with the notion in my head. But I am a doer. And I do what I am told.

My conflict is between what I feel like I should do and say- Should I be more adamant to let them know when I need them to help and deal with their behavior toward me VS telling myself that their behavior is justified because I cant live up to their expectation.

How can I ever get them to look at me like I am their best friend?

I need someone to talk to. I need advice.

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Member Comments

    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      UK Girl wrote Sep 3, 2009
    • Asking for assistance is a way better way to get help than asking for help ....

      Plus if you say ” me and this patient are looking for assistance” so your involving them ...... just a thought.

      Hope this helps honey



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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Mz. Queen wrote Sep 3, 2009
    • It is always hard when you work well alone and you come to the stage of needing help. On the other hand you don’t really want them to be your friends, they are “coworkers” and sometimes that’s all the place they need in your life.

      I agree with Melissa, “Tell them the patient needs assistance, the registration list is backed up, or a patient has been waiting too long. Make it about the job and the task....”

      I’m not trying to sound harsh, but I made the mistake of giving a coworker the title of “friend” and it backfired.

      love Donna



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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Cindylouwho1966 wrote Sep 3, 2009
    • Are you a manager?

      I agree with Donna; sometimes co-workers are just that. Being your “friend” or not should have nothing to do with them giving an extra hand every now and again.  

      I would talk to your boss or HR and keep it about the job.



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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Vikki Hall wrote Sep 3, 2009
    • It’s been so long since I had a job where I thought I could make friends. I was in management so never expected friends but if I made them then for me that was icing on the cake.
      I agree with what all has been said above. However as you go thru your day take the focus off of you in all of your communications. Instead of saying I need help say this patient or Dr needs help with can you.....
      Make it less about you and ALL about the work itself. I’m am sure your meaning really is about the patient so just change up your words. Be consistent and change will follow.



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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Lazylola wrote Sep 3, 2009
    • Once upon a time, there were four people; Their names were Everybody, Somebody, Nobody and Anybody.  Whenever there was an important job to be done, Everybody was sure that Somebody would do it. Anybody could have done it, but Nobody did it.  When Nobody did it, Everybody got angry because it was Everybody’s job.  Everybody thought that Somebody would do it, but Nobody realized that Nobody would do it.  So consequently Everybody blamed Somebody when Nobody did what Anybody could have done in the first place.



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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      (華娃娃) ChinaDoll wrote Sep 3, 2009
    • My opinion is “it all boils down to communication and how we express ourselves assertively” ... it is okay to say “I would love to help and if I can do this and this first” or “Thank you for trusting and asking me to do this BUT I have this and that and that, I just need to prioritize if you don’t mind” or “I will be glad to help and when do you need this by?  How important it is to you?  Will you be upset if I do not get this done right away????“....

      Once you overcome the negativity and resentment within you, you will be like honey to bees... love yourself and others... it will work through.



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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Marilyn09 wrote Sep 3, 2009
    • Thank you so much for your posts.

      LOL lola, I printed it and I am going to post it at my desk.

      Melissa, you hit the nail on the head about them drawing their battle lines. I have noticed it for some time now.  

      I hate how they boss me around. Its like I have 5 selfish uncaring bosses. I think that irritates me because I am a self starter and I do what I do because I see the whole picture and I see what needs to be done.
      So I get angry and sad because I feel like they think that I would sit around all day and not do anything if it wasnt for the fact that they told me what to do.

      I need strength to pull this off.
      heres my idea...

      I am going to re-train them.
      I wont do anything except xrays unless they ask me nicely. And when they confront me I am going to say- Your problem not mine.

      Maybe this isnt what yall meant - but it is what came to me after reading your posts.

      Thank you so much. I blogged this because I needed the words and wisdom to put together why I felt the way that I felt so that I knew what to do about it.



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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Vikki Hall wrote Sep 4, 2009
    • Marilyn take all the strength and support and wisdom we have on here and just know that we are backing you 100% in your pursuit to a happier work place



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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Mztracy wrote Sep 4, 2009
    • Gr8 advice from all the fabbies here!!
      xx



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