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What do you do to bond with your children?  Do you do things differently with your son than with your daughter?  Do you handle each one separately or is it a “collective” kind of bonding?



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Member Comments

    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Coachmombabe wrote Feb 3, 2009
    • Interestingly enough, I think all of my kids have the same love language, quality time, which is also mine! Out oldest son and only daughter enjoy time in conversation, talking about things of interest and importance to them. Our youngest son seems to enjoy the “doing something together” quality time. He loves to meet us for dinner, and always invites us to go bowling!  

      Fortunately, my love language is also quality time. But hubby’s is acts of service. I don’t think any of them got that one!

      I’ve also found it better for me to bond with them if they are not together. When they are they seem to need to focus the time on each other, which is also a good thing!

      Good question, Robin!



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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Doreen XoXo wrote Feb 3, 2009
    • My son is so much more affectionate than my daughter.  He’s pretty much self sufficient whereas my daughter depends on me a great deal.  

      Me and my daughter go shopping and for a bite to eat and a cocktail every now and then.  We’ve also recently starting walking together for exercise.  

      My son and I sometimes go out for sushi and have a nice chat.  He loves to show me all of his clothes he buys.  He’s a clothes freak down to every last detail.  Do you know how expensive Coogi clothing is???? Dayum!!!



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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Jenz ~ wrote Feb 3, 2009
    • lol...
      Our relationships are all different as are they. Jess, quiet & she doesn’t live here so we don’t see her as much as we’d like to. Jon’s in the AF so we bond via telephone & visits too. Christopher lives here at home so we see each other all the time & we talk about everything. Sometimes we play guitars together, sometimes watch movies, eat, just hang out. Sometimes he brings his girlfriend with & we shop or just go do whatever. We‘re all close, but the r-ships are each unique.



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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Denise Richardson wrote Feb 3, 2009
    • I love both my daughters the same but it seems my oldest and I are the closest. My youngest one is the one that wanted to challenge me coming up but she now realizes that all I said and tried to show her was for her own good but it all panned out.



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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Wittymom wrote Feb 3, 2009
    • Mommy-daughter days. Just the two of us, could be a movie and dinner, or shopping and lunch....but it is all about us, no cell phones, no email. Just us...and lots of giggles. She is 11 and I am riding this bus for as long as she lets me...I hear all kinds of stories about the teen years and I’m scared.



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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Robinesque wrote Feb 4, 2009
    • Monica, 14, & I, [almost] look forward to my husband’s business trips.  On the weekends, she will wake me up with a breakfast in bed -coffee and cereal - and something for her, and we decide the night before which DVD we will watch before 8 in my room in the morning.  Just the 2 of us.  I suggested we invite Victoria, 9, to our “secret” & she said that she really wanted this to be “just us.”  OK. My youngest son, Ali,12, seems to like when I take the crosstown drive to drop him off to school.  He’s very vocal & full of stimulating ideas and receptive to mine @ that time.  I learn a lot about him, I’ve noticed.

      One of my favorite things to do is SING!!!  So, it’s off to Vic’s room for some High School Musical on Wii.  Yes.  THIS means “mom’s singing again.”

      I can relate to DOREEN, who’s son is sooo into clothes!!!  Mine, Sal,17, is all about EXPRESS!!  Talk about expensive!!  He likes to take me shopping - just the 2 of us. I also like that he wants me to “listen to this!”  He keeps me up on the “tunes.”  COLLECTIVELY, we do take a lot of “road trips.”  And, when everyone is bored w/their own PSP, DS Lite & movies, then we PLAY WORD GAMES!!!!   YAAAAAAYYY!!!!!!!!!!!



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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Almostfive0 wrote Feb 4, 2009
    • We are all nuts when were together.
      My son and daughter share the same kooky humor as me so when were together my husband just shakes his head at us. That’s how the four of us bond, through laughter, just being silly.

      I guess me and my son also bond through debating, mostly metaphysical philosophy. He’s a bit more serious than my daughter.

      My daughter and I also bond by doing girlie stuff, sharing our goals and keeping each other lifted.



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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Suzette wrote Feb 5, 2009
    • I have four kids and I handle each of them differently, according to the things they are interested in, for example,My 22 year old daughter loves fashion and psychology, so I make time to shop with her and allow her to try to analyze me.  My 20 year old son loves animals, and art, so I try to find interesting things about animals to share with him and am truly in awe of his talent.  My 16 year old daughter loves documentaries and biographies, so I make time to watch these with her.  Finally, my 11 year old son loves skateboarding, so I listen as he explains different techniques to me and sometimes when he wants to try a move, I try, even if I fall on my butt.



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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Tuliplady wrote Feb 7, 2009
    • Duct tape.  It’s the bond that holds our disjointed family together.  LOL!  Well, not quite, but we do have a lot of fun with it.  Duct tape has been given as a frequent Christmas gift at our house, preents have been wrapped in it.  Sort of a running family joke that brings kids of very different ages, and a non-communicative man all together.

      Of the four kids, of course I spend time differently with each of them.  One I e-mail a lot and when she comes home we watch “chick flicks” together.  One I talk on the phone with daily, she’s always been my chatty kid.  One is going thru an “I hate mom” phase.  We IM and I give her space.  My son likes to go out and throw the football around the yard, so I go do that with him.  Since the kids have all gotten as big as me, I’ve drawn the line, no more playing tackle football with them.  My old bones can’t take it anymore.



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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Robinesque wrote Feb 7, 2009
    • One is going thru an "I hate mom" phase.  We IM and I give her space.  

      That’s funny, tuliplady.  I haven’t begun IMing her yet, but I give her all the space IIII can take.estatic



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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Tuliplady wrote Feb 7, 2009
    • Let me guess Robin, is she about 15 or 16?  

       Mine lives with her dad, so it’s very hard at the  moment to stay close, which suits her fine.  Some days she even replies to the IM’s.



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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Tuliplady wrote Feb 7, 2009
    • estatic  How did I ever guess!  Been thru three of the little darlings.



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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Robinesque wrote Feb 7, 2009
    • LOL!!!!
      The little darling will be 15 in May.



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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Tuliplady wrote Feb 7, 2009
    • How did that last comment get out of chronological order?



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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Owlmaria wrote Feb 7, 2009
    • I have 2 sons born 2yr.s & 2mo.s apart. The oldest is a Down Syndrome,28, he lives basically in his own world now, when he was in school I volunteered in his class & all field trips.Now that he’s older he does what he wants & b/c he doesn’t “talk” I have to play it by ear as to when he wants me to watch a movie w/ him or just spend time w/ him. It’s hard @ times b/c I really miss his school days(doing things together & his having “friends“). He is high functioning & can be very independent to the point of getting into trouble-Did it just b/c I wanted to! He functions @ the level of a 10 yr. old.
      My youngest is 26 in Mar. & finishing up his schooling w/ computers. He is so like me that we know when not to be together too much. I used to tell family that I felt so good that my son trusted me enough w/ things he needed to talk about(& I’m his mom)& would get calls at any hour just to check on us or tell me the latest news.
      Got interrupted by call from son, above, his new girlfriend(online) has a malignant cyst on her thyroid & she called Adam to tell her about her Aunt getting bad news about Cancer- she has a month to live.
      Talk about bonding, we talk about everything. I wish I could talk to Daniel. We understand each other but it isn’t the same.



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