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  • anyone have a stepford neighbor?

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    8 posts, 6 voices, 1064 views, started Sep 21, 2010

    Posted on Tuesday, September 21, 2010 by Lori Logan

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    • Amethyst
      Offline

      So, we live on a quiet cul-de-sac with two other boys my son’s age (6yo).  I don’t even know where to start this random bitch, except that one of the mothers is a superMOM.  And maybe she is, maybe I’m the one with the problem because I don’t still breastfeed or because I actually let my 6yo outside without putting him in a bubble first.  

      Anyway, stepford Sally doesn’t allow bubbleboy out of their yard without her, let alone into one of our yards.  The other mom and I are SAHMs and we watch the kids when they play outside, we just don’t keep those crazy leashes on them.  

      Gawd, I hate that I sound so petty right now, but I’m more than a bit irritated.  Zack calls her son his ‘bashbrother’ he LOVES him.  But the only way they play together is if Zack goes to his house.  And when he’s there, they do whatever bubbleboy wants (nothing too active, or the bubble might pop).

      I don’t want to be petty, to feel this HATEFUL! I don’t like myself like this, but I really hate people who think they are better than they really are.....  Stepford Sally is a very nice person.  very very nice.... and that makes me feel even worse, she’s just trying to be the best mom she knows how to be....  I just feel as if my son is getting a half-assed friendship.  

      rant complete.  

      thanks for reading. BTW, I’m Lori, new here - first day :)  really needed a place to get this off my chest.

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        • 0 votes vote up vote up

          Max0125 wrote Sep 21, 2010
        • I’ll trade you. You can have my crazy neighbors!  

          It sounds like your neighbor has a lot of fears and insecurities. You never know what has happened in someone’s past that has made them into the person they are today.  

          Good luck! And let me know if you want to swap!estatic



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        • 0 votes vote up vote up

          Lori Logan wrote Sep 21, 2010
        • Thank you Ladies for giving me some perspective!  I knew I was over-reacting, but I just couldn’t get a grasp on it.  Needed that outside look!  

          Deep down I know Zack is getting a ver fulfilling friendship, I’m the one that feels inadequate. You are compeletly right, we just have different parenting styles and it totally comes from our individual backgrounds.

          And yes, it could be worse, at least I know my son is safe when he plays up there.

          THANK YOU!!!  I feel so much better.  I tried talking with my husband, but, you were so much more helpful!

          WOW.  SO happy to be here!!

          Love to you both!

          ~Lori



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        • 0 votes vote up vote up

          Jo46 wrote Sep 21, 2010
        • We have control freak mom that lives across the street from us.  Once her 9 year old gets home from school it’s lockdown mode for him.  I never could understand how a little boy or girl could spend that much time in the house. Sometimes when my son goes and ask him to play now, his response is,“I just got home from school“. Yeah, you did get out of school a 1/2 hour ago! (I’m thinking this response in my own head.) God knows what she has him do to keep him in the house that much.  I got so frustrated one day, that I actually told my son that his friend is like a turtle that lives in a fishtank that he can see out of, but rarely get out of!  I also hate the fact that they have never even shown him how to ride a bike yet.  They still walk him to and from school and they live so close to the school!!!!!!!! We live in a neighborhood with really no kids my sons age to play with...so we have gotten quite good at inviting others over for playdates. Otherwise it is a lot of organized play-you know, doing things like karate, or being on a baseball team.  Good luck!  It sounds like with both need it! :0



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        • +1 votes vote up vote up

          Lori Logan wrote Sep 22, 2010
        • Jo, you really nailed it!  I have definately found a group of women I can relate to.  

          Isn’t it funny, or sad maybe, that we have these insecurities about something so wonderful as motherhood?  That someone else’s actions, words, or even look can make US doubt OUR parenting skills?  Luckly, I didn’t wake up with that feeling today.  This has been bothering me alot this week (perhaps because I’m getting over pneumonia and everything seems worse when you‘re sick).  Now, I’m just going to be a duck - let it roll off my back.  My son can play with hers at school, they can sit together on the bus, but I’m not going to put myself in the position of resenting her or her parenting ‘skills‘.



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        • +1 votes vote up vote up

          Ditzychick wrote Sep 23, 2010
        • Hey my children are older now, my youngest being almost 15 and I can say that I have met all kinds of mums along the way.
          Yes each one of us has a different parenting style which suits our own family but maybe not so much the family next door, across the road, down the street etc...I think its probably easier to just accept that so long as they can do the same with you cos there is nothing worse than the mum who knows best, her way or no way at all!frown

          We have enough hurdles in this life to jump over without us having to beat ourselves up as to whether we are up to standard for the household next doors ideals. So long as your child is happy,healthy and safe and you are too then you can’t be going too far wrong whatever it is your doing xxestatic



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