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  • Does It Matter Who Had the Affair First?

    5 posts, 5 voices, 1091 views, started Dec 25, 2009

    Posted on Friday, December 25, 2009 by Mz. Queen

    • Few things harm a relationship more than an affair. Whether the affair is emotional, a “one night stand” or full blown, the betrayal delivers a life altering blow.

       Will the injury to the relationship prove fatal?

        • 0 votes vote up vote up

          Karyn Olson wrote Dec 25, 2009
        • I guess it would depend on the couple...was there relationship strong before the affair? if it was...perhaps they could work through this...and most important of they want to fix it?

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        • 0 votes vote up vote up

          Jenz ~ wrote Dec 25, 2009
        • From personal experience, yes. It can’t be changed, or taken back and the trust is never 1oo% again. Save time and pain and just leave n start over again. Life is far too short to try to work through that kind of thing and all of the trying to fig out why it happened. I understand ppl make mistakes but, affairs are unacceptable choices. In addition, once a cheater, always a cheater. People like that don’t change. Sorry..

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        • 0 votes vote up vote up

          Tuliplady wrote Dec 25, 2009
        • No, it does not matter who had the affair first.   In every case I’ve ever personally seen, the marriage is a sinking ship before the affair ever begins.  Happy people don’t go out looking for someone or something else.

          It takes two very extraordinary people to fix things once trust is gone.  It can happen, but it doesn’t very often.  I know from personal experience that if love is still there on both sides, there is still hope.

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        • 0 votes vote up vote up

          Marilyn09 wrote Dec 25, 2009
        • The Title was does it matter who had an affair first?
          but the question inside was can a relationship be saved if there was an affair.

          Too me, its 2 different questions.
          If the couple is cheating back and forth, the only relationship there is to cheat. So if 2 cheaters got together- their relationship is still in tact. Bouncing back and forth hurting each other- not healthy but their relationship is still there.  

          The other part of the question is can a relationship be saved after one caught the betrayal of the other?
          and you can say- that depends on the intention.

           But (I dont have a Websters in front of me) but whats the difference of intentions and excuses.  

          Keep in mind, the path to your own personal hell is paved with good intention and good excuses.

          The bottom line is... Do you love him? Is he a good man?
          Does he love you? Is he proud of you?

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