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  • I live in Masturbation Nation!

    51 posts, 27 voices, 999 views, started Oct 8, 2008

    Posted on Wednesday, October 8, 2008 by Maura Jones

    •  



    • Amethyst
      Offline

      I’m ranting about the fact that my husband (who turns 50 this week) is THE king of constant masturbation!  

      Ladies, am I the only woman in the world who’s husband/boyfriend thinks it’s ok and normal to constantly fondle himself?  Am I just a prude?  Somebody help me out here!

      I’m not talking about the occasional scratch or adjustment.  I mean, from the moment he wakes up to the moment he falls asleep, my husband is constantly touching his penis.  He usually has a semi hard-on  off and on all day long from it, and is more sexually demanding now than when we were first married (23 years ago.)  

      When we‘re watching TV in the living room, he masturbates.  When we‘re sitting together on the couch and I’m trying to have a conversation with him, he masturbates.  When we are lying in bed and I’m trying to go to sleep, he masturbates.  When we are in bed and he’s obliging me with “cuddle time“, he masturbates.  I catch him at all hours of the night up masturbating in front of the TV or the computer.  He’s not the least bit self conscious about it.  

      I’m totally at my wits end!  When I try to talk to him about it he says he’s got more sexual energy than I’m satisfying for him and I should be grateful that he’s not taking it somewhere else.  

      At this point, I’m ready to give him permission to go to the whore house!  We live in Nevada!

      What say you ladies?



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        • 0 votes vote up vote up

          Almostfive0 wrote Oct 8, 2008
        • LOL...soooo funny!
          My husband isn’t quite that bad but it doesn’t take much. He’s constantly adjusting and rearranging and can find some sexual in anything.



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          Dianne67 wrote Oct 8, 2008
        • my boyfriend treats his penis like it is his buddy.  He wears boxers and his penis is always peaking out.  I feel like it is the three of us hanging out together when we are watching tv.  

          He is not a masturbator ever since we have been dating for over a year now because I am a sex pig and I am always interested in some action.  However, prior to me he would masturbate often.  

          Maybe you should start playing with yourself like he does and see what he thinks of it.  

          Hugs-
          Dianne



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          Dawna Gauthier wrote Oct 8, 2008
        • I’m in agreement with dianne67, try it yourself for a while and see where he goes with that.  Heck, you may like it too! If my husband had half the sexual energy your husband has I’d be a VERY happy camper.

          On a serious side...that’s not normal.  Does he ejaculate each time?  I would imagine he would get tired or worn out after a while. Best of luck with this one.  Maybe you should call the doctor.



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          Kisbel65 wrote Oct 8, 2008
        • I would talk to him about it. Men can’t masturbate without fantasizing. The fantasys may be overwhelming him and he needs to act on them so he masturbates.  If he can’t stop, its an addiction and he should get help. Just recently a famous actor, David Duchovny, admitted he was addicted to online porn. Basically, its obsessive compulsive behavior. Don’t be alarmed about what I am about to tell you, but does he have Parkinson’s? I am in the medical field and there are drugs for Parkinsons that cause gambling and sex addictions...belive it or not...its true.



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          Inakika wrote Oct 8, 2008
        • Boy, the palm of his hand must be RAW! Not to mention other parts! Have you considered contacting The Guiness Book of World Records? Talk about a record breaker!



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          Dawna Gauthier wrote Oct 8, 2008
        • PS..I forgot to mention that I just love the title you chose for this thread!  LOL....too funny



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          Dianne67 wrote Oct 8, 2008
        • I have always hear that once little boys discover their penis, they are enthrolled with it.  Have you ever noticed a baby touching himself down there when he is getting a bath or a diaper change.  They must feel some sensation at a young age.

          I think men are very proud of their appendage.  It is what makes them a man.  It is like holding a joystick or a remote control.  

          Hugs-
          Dianne



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          Gina Venturini wrote Oct 8, 2008
        • Maura,

          Wow, maybe it was all the years he played on the road w/out you and instead of cheating like most musicians would,  he  masturbated to the point he can’t stop.  

          I don’t know if I could take it being done in front of me. I had a boyfriend once who was masturbating when I walked into his room and it creeped me out.  It must be a drummer thing. Every drummer I’ve known is very sexual. Have you tried for the both of you to talk to a counselor about it?  

          I agree w/ Jackie...Check the medicine cabinet. Good Luck!



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          Maura Jones wrote Oct 8, 2008
        • No, he doesn’t ejaculate...just stays stiff all the time.  Yes, he’s been popping Viagra but he SWEARS he only uses them when we plan to have sex, not to masturbate.  It’s just like he’s a kid who doesn’t know that it’s inappropriate.  I’m not against masturbation per se, I’d just like him to do it in private or as a pre-sex activity. Not ALL THE TIME!  I’ve finally gotten him to agree to at least wearing boxers around the house so I don’t have to look at his penis all the time.  We work on Cruise Ships and live in very small accommodations and when were in our cabin his penis was constantly right there in my face because of the tiny room we had to share.  

          Thanks for making me smile about it all cause I was getting ready to have a melt down!



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          Shopgirl1960 wrote Oct 8, 2008
        • Oh my gosh!!!!!  This needs to be a script for a television show. I swear it does!  You girls have me laughing so hard
          that I nearly fell out of my chair.Saying things like,“He treats it like it’s his buddy and it’s always peeking out.” And, he holds on to it like he’s afraid it’s going to get away !!!
          OHhhhhhhhhhhhhh my gosh!!!!

          I’m afraid at this moment I would be of no use ... because my laughing cannot stop.



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          Humming1975bird wrote Oct 8, 2008
        • Sounds like a script from a Seinfeld episode to me.  He must be the “Master of his domain”



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          Dianne67 wrote Oct 8, 2008
        • This has been one funny posting.  

          I hate to add more humor; but my boyfriend’s penis is named which gives him even more of an identity.  He them named my right and left boobs.  Is this too much!!!

          I love chatting with woman that are fun and with it!!!

          Hugs-
          Dianne



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          Gina Venturini wrote Oct 8, 2008
        • Lol. I think the Viagra has taken over his penis. What’s the Commercials say? If you have an erection for more than so many hours call your doctor.

          You sure he’s not addicted to Viagra?
          I just get this picture in my sick/dimented mind of him walking through the buffet room of the cruise ship trying to get to the stage and he accidentally bumps  into a little old lady. Check Please!;)



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          Chrisdih wrote Oct 8, 2008
        • This is one hilarious post and I’m glad everyone helped you laugh Maura! Was he always like this? It sounds like he was not from your comment about him being more sexually demanding. Maybe it IS a side effect of Viagra and you should ask your doctor. Or buy him a good vibrator!



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          Dianne67 wrote Oct 8, 2008
        • I say you have so much sex with him that he doesn’t even have to energy to take it out for air.

          Hugs-
          Dianne



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          Feathermaye wrote Oct 8, 2008
        • First of all, I can’t believe the title of this blog slipped past my radar today!!

          Secondly, although I know much of it is meant in fun, my husband and I are now debating the actual definition of masturbation. He says if you don’t have an orgasm, it’s not masturbation. I say, if you‘re freaking touching it all damn day and not cumming, it’s masturbation—you‘re just doing it wrong!!! ;)

          Seriously, it sounds as if he’s maybe dealing with an addiction to the way he feels when he’s aroused. If he wanted to orgasm (and I’m guessing he can cross that bridge), he would. Wouldn’t he?

          I haven’t read all of the replies here yet (I still can’t believe this has all gone on without me noticing. I must be working too hard!), but unless it’s totally interfering with your life, sexually or otherwise, it may just be his new thing.  

          Better than a newer model car... or worse.

          p.s. I’d hate it too, for the record.



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          Almostfive0 wrote Oct 8, 2008
        • I was going to ask you earlier what instrument he plays in the band...but, well, now I know!



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          Daphne wrote Oct 8, 2008
        • Holy crap...i’m laughing hysterically and my 14-year-old son wants to know why!  

          Maura...i’d be pretty pissed if my husband whipped it out when i was trying to have a conversation with him.  That’s disrespectful, at the very least.  I definitely think he needs to talk to a medical professional...it’s not normal, not even for a drummer!  :c)



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        • 0 votes vote up vote up

          Yana Berlin wrote Oct 8, 2008
        • Maura,

          I think this is a David question.

          I’ll alert him immediately, I can’t wait to hear what he’s got to say on the subject.



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        • 0 votes vote up vote up

          Almostfive0 wrote Oct 8, 2008
        • Wears really big pants!



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          Lorilyn wrote Oct 8, 2008
        • wears really big pants..too much.lmbo.my DH has a similar drive,but not to the point of constant self pleasing.it sounds like his body needs the stimulation and he feels lost without .
          we had a guest speaker in our teen health class who talked about this subject and he said something about a chemical in the brain that gets released when sexually stimulated.the brain becomes addicted to the chemical and dependent on it to feel happy and becomes depressed without it.



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        • 0 votes vote up vote up

          Maura Jones wrote Oct 8, 2008
        • Re: Is it masturbation or not?
          Maybe masturbation is too strong a word, but damn if I don’t agree with you feathermaye!
          Maybe I should say fondling as it doesn’t seem to be that he’s trying to get off, just likes the sensations I suppose. It’s so good to hear all the different perspectives on it. Can’t wait to hear what the make perspective is....
          M~



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        • 0 votes vote up vote up

          Robinesque wrote Oct 8, 2008
        • Endorphins, lorilyn!  My husband just discovered this word!



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          Maura Jones wrote Oct 8, 2008
        • CHrisdih...vibrators...that’s a whole new post for later!!!
          Stay tuned!!
          M~



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        • 0 votes vote up vote up

          Peejay64 wrote Oct 8, 2008
        • Wow!  Funny stuff, ladies.  However, Maura, dear, I think too much of a good thing is not a good thing...masturbating, diddling, whatever you want to call it...there is too much self-stimulating and or satisfying going on.  I agree with Daphne, and find it disrespectful that he would fondle, diddle, masturbate, whatever you want to call it (!) with you right there next to him.  Whether you‘re upright or horizontal, watching t.v. or trying to sleep.  Geez!  

          I would almost recommend getting him off the Viagra and see how things go without it.  And on a more serious note, possibly check into counseling.  That’s just not normal and there could be a deep-seeded issue that is causing this.

          Good luck!



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        • 0 votes vote up vote up

          David M. Matthews wrote Oct 8, 2008
        • First let me say that men and masturbation are a natural pairing, like burgers and fries, movies and popcorn, assault and battery.  Masturbation is so important to men, in fact, that an entire chapter of “Every Man Sees You Naked” is devoted to guys and their preoccupation with their “little buddy” (although many males may wince at that diminutive descriptor).  That being said, most men like to stroke their privates...privately.  Fondly fondling our frontal appendage in a semi-private or public manner is not really the way most of us roll.  Sure, we like the feel of a warm hand on our crotch (though, YOUR warm hand is our preference), but the overwhelming majority of men resist the urge to perform PDA’s with ourselves, lest we be appropriately labeled a “jerk-off,” exhibitionist, sexual deviant or worse.  

          I’d love to tell you, Maura, that your guy’s obsession with his manhood is common.  Unfortunately, I don’t think it is.  And I DO believe that his current condition (since he was not always like this) is related to his use of circulation enhancement pharmaceuticals he’s likely inhaling like Tic-Tacs.  The drug gets him hard, and triggers a primal urge to caress his turgid flesh, whether or not such behavior is time, place, or situation-appropriate by most other people’s standards.  I am not, however, blaming the drug.  Lots of guys take Viagra without finding their penis magnetically drawn to their own sweaty palms.  

          So what can you do?  You could talk to your guy and try and convince him you find his constant self-love a little disconcerting, although this would probably yield little results.  You could suggest he seek counseling, but if he is like most men, he would probably rather nail his toenails to a bulletin board, than see a shrink.  You could suggest he find a new hobby that would keep his hands busy, like video games, crocheting, or whittling.  Or you could keep him so busy sexually, that his poor penis would be too sore to welcome the attention of his sympathetic hands.  Admittedly, none of these are perfect solutions to your problem (actually, HIS problem), but perhaps a combination of the aforementioned suggestions, along with a little frank conversation, might get some results.  If not, try Dianne67’s suggestion of playing with yourself in front of him.  It may not get him to stop, but if YOU‘RE enjoying yourself enough, you may not care.



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          Lorilyn wrote Oct 8, 2008
        • ?diddling.loL



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          Gina Venturini wrote Oct 8, 2008
        • I am learning so much today.;)



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          Maura Jones wrote Oct 8, 2008
        • Oh God GIna...if you ever tell him!
          ME=[Seriously Blushing!!!]



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          Gina Venturini wrote Oct 8, 2008
        • How would I ever talk to him? What is said on Fab 40 stays on Fab 40.



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        • 0 votes vote up vote up

          Maura Jones wrote Oct 8, 2008
        • Thanks everyone for your input on this “dangling” issue of mine.
          I have, and will again, be speaking to my man about this. I think I might even show him some of these comments. (I cut & paste like a PRO!)
          I do believe that the problem began after he started taking Viagra, which he doesn’t actually have a diagnosis for, but get’s out of the country when we travel. I broached the “Addicted to Viagra” subject with him just the other night and he is adamant that he is not, but insists that he needs it to stay erect. If he’s not lying to me about NOT using it during masturbation, then I can attest to the fact that he can get an erection without it. He swears that he just can’t keep it. I told him I think he’s just overstimulating himself and doesn’t have any energy left when it comes to actual intercourse. I’ve asked him to stop taking it, AND to stop masturbating in between times and let some tension build. He’s said he’ll do whatever I want, but I won’t be happy with the results of him not taking Viagra and trying to have intercourse. I’m determined to prove him wrong, so I’m making him wait for it and hoping he’ll be true to his word and not get himself off. We’ll see how it goes. Hopefully, I’ll have some good news to announce!
          Maura~



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          Dianne67 wrote Oct 8, 2008
        • Maura...thanks for the laughs, that was a great discussion!!

          sherisgarden if you are being hurt emotionally by what your husband is doing; you need to do something about it.  Don’t settle for having to just deal with it.  Porn can really hurt a marriage.  If both parties enjoy it together, than so be it.  But, when one is enjoying it while the other is disurbed by this behavior, it can cause hurt and resentment.  We don’t need to settle anymore as woman.  We are stronger and can take control of our own destiny and not just give in.  I hope you can come to some resolution.

          Hugs-
          Dianne



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        • 0 votes vote up vote up

          Almostfive0 wrote Oct 9, 2008
        • Sherisgarden,
          I agree with empower and dianne67.
          We have had a lot of fun with this post and I hope that maura finds some answers to her husbands problem...
          but seriously...It sounds like your husbands problems are really seriously effecting not only your marriage but most importantly your self esteem and well being.
          Not only do you have to deal with your hurt feelings and how you are starting to feel about yourself you literally have to clean up after his messes. You may want and need to find outside help.
          If after you have talked with him about this and if he does not want to seek help together I hope that you will find help for yourself.

          You are the most important person in your life.
          Peace.



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          Daphne wrote Oct 9, 2008
        • Either i’m a complete bitch or those two men are off the charts!  I wouldn’t tolerate cleaning up after his sel-gratification session even ONE time.  I see Maura’s husband’s whipping it out as disrespectful, but i see Sheri’s husband’s actions as pretty disgusting.  If he can’t contain his “mess“, get him his own computer to gum up.  Hell would freeze before i’d allow my husband (or any other man) to ejaculate on my stuff and leave it, expecting me (or anyone else) to clean it up.  Imposing their “needs” on others is unacceptable.

          Whatever happened to a little mystery in a relationship? There are plenty of things we humans do that are best left in private, don’t you think?  

          God love you Sheri and Maura...you have WAY more tolerance in this area than i ever would.  BTW...i just watched a news piece on TV about foreign made drugs.  It ain’t safe and it ain’t pretty.



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          Peejay64 wrote Oct 9, 2008
        • In regards to Daphne’s last comment:  DITTO girlfriend!



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          Meshell Forest wrote Oct 9, 2008
        • I don’t know ladies.  

          Maybe I am just a hard ass, Total and Complete Biotch.  

          When our Men were boys growing up into the teen years, and learning to become MEN, Masturbating was something that was acceptable,  they were learning about their bodies, and how to deal with them and when issues came up how to handle it.  

          These Boys are MEN now, and they no longer need to diddle with their Winkies anymore.  And ESP in how these Women here are talking about.  

          I guess, Maybe I am just a Total Biotch, because there is just NO WAY in HELL I would put up with any of this. I deserve more respect than that in this Marriage than that. If my husband started to masturbate in my presence, I would grab the Water hose and spray him with it, telling him he needs to COOL OFF...  

          Ugh, that is just disrespectful.  

          I probably have stepped on some toes here, but this is just my opinion.  

          Meshell~



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        • 0 votes vote up vote up

          Jldixon wrote Oct 9, 2008
        • hey girls..... I love the “diddle” and “diddle with their winkies” thing.  That’s soooo funny.  I think I’ll ask my hubby tonight if I can diddle with his winkie.  LMAO  I can see the expression on his face now.

          I don’t think Meshell or peejay are total biotche’s.  I just think that people are brought up differently and think of masterbation or diddling (still smiling) differently.  To some it’s taboo, to some it’s a natural common occurance, esp. when it comes to men. I can say that my husband diddles and adjusts alot.  Not masterbating, but it’s like he’s just checking ~ just to make sure it’s still breathing or something.  You know like how new moms check on their babies when they sleep through their 2 hour feeding for the first time.  Plus when he sleeps in the recliner, he has to hold it.  It’s funny, he don’t hold it in the bed.

          And he has taken cialis (however you spell it).  And the way he explains it is:  if you even think about cooter, it starts getting hard.  So, maybe the viagra is a little too strong for him.  

          I’m pretty laid back with my husband.  Sometimes he takes it out and shakes it at me and says “say hello to my little friend, and I’ve made the little hole in the end look like a mouth and start moving it, talking in a funny voice, and speak to him with it. LOL  It’s just our sick sense of humor I guess, but I’ll also flash him if I’m sitting on the couch and he walks by.  It’s all good times.  However, if he took it out and diddled with it while I was having a conversation with him, after I got finnished laughing at him hysterically, I would ask him if he needed some alone time with himself.  

          In a “nut“shell, :0}  Guess I’m saying that yeah, if it’s really starting to bother you, really make him know that it bothers you, and ask him if he’s ever seen the movie “If I don’t stop will I go blind“. (I think that’s the name of it) I swear it’s a movie though.  But convince him that going to his doctor and asking for advise from him will satisfy him more than what he’s getting from where ever he’s getting it.



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        • 0 votes vote up vote up

          Sandy Ochoa-West wrote Oct 9, 2008
        • OMG TMI- I am totally blushing. Love your candidness, nice to have a place to do that.



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        • 0 votes vote up vote up

          Jldixon wrote Oct 9, 2008
        • oh yeah, I forgot, maura: you HAVE to look at this.  You will die laughing:  

          and here’s the cartoon version:  



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        • 0 votes vote up vote up

          Cindylouwho1966 wrote Oct 9, 2008
        • David, I looooove the word “turgid.”

          What I think is so funny (odd) is how, when we were growing up, this was never duscussed. Now you’ve got guys on TV shows, “Oh hell, yeah, I was jackin’ it last night!” It’s now a flippin’ badge of honor!

          Fortunately for us women, the “marital aid” stigma is fading as well.



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        • 0 votes vote up vote up

          Cindylouwho1966 wrote Oct 9, 2008
        • Oh, Maura, give him this info re: needs to stay hard all the time—

          A guy my best friend knows got “testicular neuropathy” after hvaing a boner too long, and now will never have an erection again.



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        • 0 votes vote up vote up

          Loli Vasquez wrote Oct 12, 2008
        • too freaking funny!!!!

          Maurajones: I say get your answer from a Male’s Perspective (David M Matthews) heck, he wrote us a huge article as to why men love BJ’s (blow jobs) soooooo much, he should be able to shed some light to this topic!!! lol!!



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