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  • Is this group still active?

    24 posts, 12 voices, 1417 views, started Feb 13, 2010

    Posted on Saturday, February 13, 2010 by Megan50




    • Aquamarine
      Offline

      It looks as tho most of the people in it are no longer visiting the site.  I am curious about why that is.  So, If anyone is still active and interested in connecting I would love to hear from you.  i don’t have kids of my own.  I have been a foster parent to many, from FOO and from the social service system.





        • +1 votes vote up vote up

          Dawnkaren wrote Feb 28, 2010
        • Hi Megan
          Just joined this site - am still finding my way around.  Great to connect with you and this group.  I have yet to write my introduction/blog thingy, but am happily married with no kids, except the four legged variety.

          Talk more soon
          Dawn Karen



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        • +1 votes vote up vote up

          Kyah wrote Feb 28, 2010
        • I just joined the group and answered the latest question. I didn’t know there was such a group in here, so hopefully we can get some interest going.



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        • +1 votes vote up vote up

          Kimo04 wrote Mar 14, 2010
        • HI all-
          I just joined the site too.... is it still active? Looks like it.... I too, am married, no kids, but doggies..... No kids was a choice my husband and I made on our own before we even met. People find it so odd we have no kids... it’s so annoying! Glad to see and hear all the others out there in similar situation or life choice. I love it! Looking forward to more updates.
          chat soon!



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        • 0 votes vote up vote up

          Ladisheets wrote Mar 14, 2010
        • i am married, no kids 1 cat. we have a full life together and i think there are more of us than we realize.Married with no children that is.

          we have been married 17 years and finaly at 46 and 47 people have stopped asking us about kids.tongue out



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          Frannie1964 wrote Mar 15, 2010
        • I know what you mean Ladisheets. Except now they don’t ask me when hubby and I are having kids. Now It’s ” How come you and your husband didn’t have kids?” It gets me a bit upset cause I have to repeat the same answer over and over. It was both our dicision and thats what we both wanted even before we met. I know people mean well and It’s just a question they feel they need to ask, but I can’t wait till they stop asking...lol

          Now for me I have my fur babieshappy



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        • +1 votes vote up vote up

          Ladisheets wrote Mar 15, 2010
        • I heart fur babies



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        • 0 votes vote up vote up

          Cynthia Schmidt wrote Mar 15, 2010
        • I never had children. My husband has a 29 year old daughter and 4 year old granddaughter. I have a cat who I just love to pieces. So, do I count?



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        • 0 votes vote up vote up

          Frannie1964 wrote Mar 15, 2010
        • Of course Cynthia estatic heart



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          Ladisheets wrote Mar 15, 2010
        • Yes YES you do!  I to have a cat that i just love to pieces.



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          Megan50 wrote Mar 16, 2010
        • As I was reading Cynthia’s question and the responses I realized that IRL I am always discounted by other women for not being a “real” mother. Never gave birth, haven’t raised a single child from birth to adulthood.  So its nice to have this venue to connect and see how many women are not mothers.



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        • 0 votes vote up vote up

          Mictinkc wrote Jun 15, 2010
        • Hello ladies!! I, too, am childless, but have “children in fur” (dogs only-allergic to cats).  I was pregnant at the age of 18, only to miscarry at 3 months and never was able to get pregnant again due to endometriosis and then cervical cancer, which lead to my hysterectomy in my late 20’s. I only wish that I had done the surgery at 17 when the first Dr suggested it. It sure would have saved a LOT of heart-break and pain, which, also, lead to an addiction to pain killers.
          My husband of (almost) 17 years has a daughter aged 24 that just graduated college, and I am her God-Mother. Long story there!! I was good friends with him for many years before we “got together” and used to spend summers with him and his (now) ex-wife, thus leading them to name me their daughter’s God-Mother. She is like my daughter in every sense of the word without the “stuff” that mothers have to go through.
          BUT, I am happy with my 4-legged children and they don’t have the difficulties that “human” children have, NOR do they talk back and give you a lot of grief!
          They have nothing but total and complete, unconditional love for you ALL of the time and can tell when you are sick and/or just having a bad day.



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        • +1 votes vote up vote up

          Mictinkc wrote Jun 15, 2010
        • AMEN!! Thank God for our fur babies!! :)



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        • 0 votes vote up vote up

          Frannie1964 wrote Jun 15, 2010
        • Mictinkc....your fur babies are so adorable!!heart

          I am so sorry to hear about your miscarriage and cervical cancer when you were younger. So glad your doing better now and you got your fur babies to get you thru the days and a loving husband I am sure.heart

          I love my fur babies, they keep me sane. I too don’t have children, so my fur babies get spolied by hubby and I all the time.

          This group wasn’t active for awhile and then It started up again, but seems like It hasn’t been to active once again...lol, But you are welcome to post some threads or questions or just start a conversation to get It stared againestatic I am always on here everyday, and If you need a friend to talk to or vent, you got some wonderful Ladies here for support.



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        • 0 votes vote up vote up

          Angelcart wrote Jun 15, 2010
        • I  have one grown son.  I have several friends who have chosen to not have kids and have no regrets.  I have never asked them “why“.....not my business.  I can’t understand how people can, other women or men for that matter, can tell you that you are any less of a mother than one who gave birth.  frown  Makes no sense to me.



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        • 0 votes vote up vote up

          Angelcart wrote Jun 15, 2010
        • Actually I have more friends who chose to not have children than friends that actually do.



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        • 0 votes vote up vote up

          Cynthia Schmidt wrote Jun 15, 2010
        • I’d participate in the group if there are members who want to make it active again. In fact, this morning I realized something about not being a mother.

          I went walking with a couple of ladies who are parents in my husband’s school. Within minutes I felt like the “third wheel”

          They talked the whole time about their kids, the friendships of the moms at the school and I started to wonder why I was even invited. I was uncomfortable.



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        • 0 votes vote up vote up

          Dawnkaren wrote Jun 15, 2010
        • Cynthia... I can totally relate, this has happened to me too.  

          Now I avoid those kind of situations happy



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        • 0 votes vote up vote up

          Kyah wrote Jun 15, 2010
        • Furry children give you unconditional love, the other ones can sometimes say and do things that make you wonder why you had them in the first place.  

          Cynthia, I understand your uneasiness. I listen to women at work just babble on and on about their kids: “My kids are this and that and are so smart” and blah blah blah. When they go on about their grand kids, I usually get up and leave. Some of these women are so unhappy with their own lives that they ignore it all and try to control their children ad nauseum. Some are actually jealous of me because I live my life the way I please, don’t have to pinch pennies to send kids through school and spend my paycheck on my needs, no one else. Some try to pity me, ‘she must be lonely’ type of thing, and I’m quite the opposite.  

          Some had children so there is someone around to care for them when they get sick and old or because they want a child who looks like them. What selfish, egotistical reasons to have children! There are no guarantees that your children are going to care for you when you get sick and old.  

          I’ve reached more youngsters by just being part of the community than I could ever reach by having a child. Just because you have the ability to bear children, doesn’t mean you have to. Out of 10 close friends only 2 have children and out of all of my cousins, only one has a child.

          I respect the women who choose to have and raise children as much as I respect women like myself who choose not to. In this world a child needs to feel and know what it’s like to be wanted, because more often than not, the unwanted kill the wanted all the time.



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        • 0 votes vote up vote up

          Milliet wrote Aug 1, 2010
        • I’m happy with fur babies too - always have preferred to share my house with animals!
          I never really made a choice not to have kids but never felt the pressure/desire to have them that my friends did either.  What really annoys me though is that people always think that there’s something wrong with me or my partner, it never occurs to them that we might genuinely not want children.



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        • 0 votes vote up vote up

          Cynthia Schmidt wrote Aug 1, 2010
        • Thank you ladies for understanding and commenting.  

          I’d like to participate in this group if we want to keep it going.

          I’m now participating in the raising of my husband’s 5 year old granddaughter. I’m enjoying it very much but I find myself saying “I don’t know if I’m doing this right. I never raised anybody.” estatic



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        • 0 votes vote up vote up

          Frannie1964 wrote Aug 1, 2010
        • Cynthia, I am sure it will come naturally as you go along. Your a wonderful lady and I bet you’ll do great. I would be saying the same thing, not sure I would be able to do the right thing or am I messing up. Good luck and your granddaughter is so adorable.heart



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        • 0 votes vote up vote up

          Kyah wrote Aug 1, 2010
        • Cynthia, there is no manual on parenting or grandparenting, but just like with life you make a few mistakes and learn from them.And when in doubt, there are plenty of mothers and grandmothers in here that can answer your questions.

          I’m for keeping this group active for sure.



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