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  • Need HEALP !!!!!!!!!!!!

    7 posts, 6 voices, 956 views, started Aug 12, 2010

    Posted on Thursday, August 12, 2010 by Ivegon1




    • Aquamarine
      Offline

      I went to Florida for a family trip with my sons and my sisters and their kids. I older son asked me if he could bring his girlfriend and I said yes. We were at Florida but everything when wrong. My older son was just paying attention to his girlfriend and I feel so bad, they were acting like husband and wife. All that makes me so angry. We started discussing about it very bad. That day we were at Daytona Beach. In the way back to the hotel 2 hrs from Daytona he was driving and started driving 40 mp in a 20 mp zone, I told him to stop driving like that and he shouted you want to drive, and continued driving the same way, a said shouted to him stop driving like that and he again do the same (do you want to drive) I said no, then I drive the way I feel like it, he responded to me. When he said that I was so mad and slap him in his face, at that moment he challenge me and told me to do it again, and I did. He stopped the car in a very hard way, got out the car and wanted to leave. I said to him that he would not stay there and to get back to the car. We passed words, one of my other sons convincing him to get back in the car. I drove back to the hotel and at the hotel I didn't went to the room decided to walk so I cool off. For my surprise him and his girlfriend backed all their things and leave the hotel back to NY in a airplane, We drove to Florida and he didn't care that I would have to drive all by myself back. He called my the next day to told me that he was leaving the house, we talked a lot that day and I asked him to way until a get home and if he still wanted to leave I would respect his decision. He leaved before I got home and since then we aren't in a good communication. This is killing me; I don't know what to do any more. I'm going to therapy but I don't think is helping a lot. I'm crying all the time. I need help because in this moment of my life I feel like everything is over, and I don't know what to do





        • 0 votes vote up vote up

          Momofthreeprincess wrote Aug 12, 2010
        • First things first:  If you wanted your son to spend time with you the you should have never said that the girl friend was invited.  That being said apologize for getting upset with him for spending so much time with her and not with the family.   About his driving you had every right to tell him that he was driving like a fool.  20 miles over the speed limit is considered reckless driving.  Personally I would have told him yes I do want to drive because you are driving like a fool. Unfortunately if he wants to move out and he is over the age of 18 you really can’t stop him but you can stop any kind of support you give him.  The best thing is to sit and talk to him about what happened why you were upset with him and how you feel.  Let him also say what is bothering him so much that he feels that he had to leave and move out.



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        • 0 votes vote up vote up

          Angelcart wrote Aug 12, 2010
        • Hmmm that’s sad.  You didn’t mention his age.  Sound’s as if he’s older than 18.  In my opinion, I don’t think you can fault him for spending time with his girlfriend (my son started that at 15!).  I would have told him to pull over and drove myself.  You should have never slapped him once yet alone twice.  I’m sure you feel very bad about it and I’m sure it embarrassed him a lot in front of the others.  Like Momof3 said, you can’t stop him from moving out and put yourself in his shoes if it was the other way around.  I’d give him space and time to cool off.  Hopefully in time he’ll get over it and your relationship will mend soon.



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        • 0 votes vote up vote up

          Denise Richardson wrote Aug 12, 2010
        • Ditto to what Momof3 said. I wish you all the best and that things get back to normal with you and your son soon just let time take this.



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        • 0 votes vote up vote up

          Jo46 wrote Aug 12, 2010
        • I think you both need a few days to mellow and to get your thoughts together.  I think you should call him and possibly apoligize for not making it clear that you actually wanted to spend time with just the immediate family. This possibly caused you to be critical of his decisions, and possibly caused him to also be hypersensitive as well.   Either way, good luck!



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        • 0 votes vote up vote up

          Ivegon1 wrote Aug 13, 2010
        • yes I know I disrespect him from of her but he did it to me first and my other two sons were in the car, if I let him to shout at my in front of people, I’m setting and example for the others that is ok to do the to me the same as their brother.  Did talk him this week in a text that at this moment we are not ready to talk about everything that happen because we are not ready yet, but we do need to talk about that. He took me that he don’t want to talk about anything now or later and he just want to continue moving in life. For me that was like telling me I want nothing to do with  you and how you feel.   I had being his mother and his father since day one in his life, his father died before he was born and no be able to talk to my son the way we used to do is killing me. ............



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        • 0 votes vote up vote up

          Ivegon1 wrote Aug 13, 2010
        • heartbreakheartbreakheartbreakheartbreakheartbreakheartbreakheartbreakheartbreakheartbreakheartbreakheartbreakheartbreakheartbreakheartbreakheartbreakheartbreakheartbreakheartbreakheartbreakheartbreakheartbreakheartbreakheartbreakheartbreakheartbreakheartbreakheartbreakheartbreakfrownfrownfrownfrownfrownfrownfrownfrown



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