New to all this

I have a 19 year old son.  My husband has a 19 year old daughter.  I agree....boys are easier to raise than girls are.  I’ve been sitting here thinking how to “not” come across ugly....I’ll start by saying I know some terrific teenage girls.  That being said, when both our kids were 14 (when we got married) I never felt accepted by her.  (she has a mother so I never tried to be her “mother“).  I was there to witness the “manipulation” to get what she wanted from Dad and it always worked.  When I would bring this up to my husband he would get angry with me and shut down.  So, I tried very hard to keep my opinions to myself.  And that was not easy!!  I would have to sit her down and give her a good “what for” when she starts being demanding with you.  I look back when I was her age and I could probably say I was the same with my mother.  And, that was because I knew darn good and well not to EVEN try it with my dad.  If I could go back in time I would change how I treated my mother at times when I was a teenager.  I lost her when I was 17, to cancer, and have carried the guilt with to this day.  I’m comforted by knowing she loved me very much though.  She will get better when she matures more.  Hang in there!