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  • remembing your love and loving it!

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    13 posts, 9 voices, 773 views, started Jul 4, 2010

    Posted on Sunday, July 4, 2010 by Cheekymonkey




    • My husband and I have been married 18 years not all great not because we didn’t love each other but because we forgot to love being in love. But we starting taking time for each other again and putting life’s little issues aside when it’s our time. We remembered what it was like to be in love with each other. It’s an amazing feeling ladies and I’d be happy to share more with anyone that needs advice or busts wants to share.

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        • 0 votes vote up vote up

          Michelle05 wrote Jul 4, 2010
        • I need to find a way to rekindle the love in my marriage.  frown
          heartbreak

          I think I fell out of love a few years ago and have been just hanging on hoping for change, but nothing yet and it feels worse lately.  A lot of it revolves around “lack of” money!  I’m unemployed right now looking for a FT job and my hubby isn’t making the kind of money he was 3 years ago, nowhere NEAR it!  He’s depressed and watches TV and naps every minute he is home.... I’m not that kind of person.  I like to be active and busy.  Exercise is my own therapy, I guess hubby doesn’t have any interest in losing the 50lbs he has gained in the last years.

          How can I fall in love again?  I know that I love him, but definitely not “in love” anymore.  Most of the time his presence just annoys me.... too many things have happened these last years that I can’t just overlook.

          Michelle



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        • 0 votes vote up vote up

          Mzd3 wrote Jul 4, 2010
        • Thats great, ID be interested in hearing more ....



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        • 0 votes vote up vote up

          Kathryn O'Hara wrote Jul 4, 2010
        • Now that we have been married for almost 28 yrs, I love my husband more, but instead of passion,it is more of an affection and respect and trust.  I try to always treat him with consideration and he returns it.  In the last year or so, I have had 4 of my married neices, in their 20s, tell me that they want their marriages to be like mine.  While they love their parents, they want a marriage like mine.  

          I go thru periods of feeling the loss of “passion” but I have come to the understanding, (now working on the acceptance of...!) that I am in a new phase of marriage.  I am now in the position to mentor, or lead by example, young spouses in young marriages.  Those young women, they watch us old broads and even if they don’t admit it, they are watching!  And absorbing the lessons we teach them by how we live our lives and loves.  So when I get down about the lack of romance or sex or feelings of love, I try to remind myself of the stages of love and right now I am in the season of leading by example and I can teach and inspire young couples just by how I am with my man.  And I try to remember that mature love accepts someone for who he is and who he is not...just wish he would pick up his damn socks!



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          Cheekymonkey wrote Jul 4, 2010
        • happy First I’d like to say thank you to all of u for your posts. Sometimes this topic can be the one that rocks you to your core. @Neicy, first your an inspiration. I have read a lot of your posts and we do plan on growing very old together and spoiling our grandchildren!
          @michelle05, I know this sounds silly but u can never assume in life. You have talked to him and told him how you feel right? The reason I ask is I started to feel the same way and I assumed my husband knew how I felt (because of all the little digs and comments) and he just didn’t care because it didn’t get better.We both have stressful jobs so to make a long story shorter..one morning I told him I loved him and he was an amazing father but I was done. I won’t go into it all I’d bore everyone but the truth is I never set him down and looked him in the eye and opened up how I was feeling. I was cheating us both because I assumed.
          We are very happy and respectful and loving again and yes our bedroom life has totally taken off again. Things are so good that I lost 53 lbs and feel great and so very proud to be his wife. He still loves his footie(hes from England ) but now he balances tv, sports, and me.....still won’t pick up socks. Let me know how your feeling.



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          Cheekymonkey wrote Jul 4, 2010
        • @dranne407, Are you married?
          @missuso,  we have all that plus the bedroom and this shows my daughter how it can be. He wont pick up socks either. Lol.



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        • 0 votes vote up vote up

          Mzd3 wrote Jul 4, 2010
        • @crisastbury4  yes, married 20 yrs, about to become empty nesters.



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        • 0 votes vote up vote up

          Cheekymonkey wrote Jul 4, 2010
        • That is something I’m scared about but sorta excited.  It will be awhole new level of our marriage and for my growth as well. My baby is just starting high school so our goal is to make sure she can be independent in college.  I guess I have time still. How are you and your hubby doing with it?estatic



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          Vikki Hall wrote Jul 7, 2010
        • I think this is a great topic to have and continue with. I do know that stress and busy-ness with life and kids can have an impact on your relationship with your spouse.  

          For me when I went thru I needed to fall in love with ME again. I was so far removed from doing things for me and relaxing for me and shopping for me. So when I wasn’t feeling so great about ME it was pretty hard for me to be IN love with my hubz.

          I worked thru it and found me again and was able to fall in love with my hubz again.

          So I would say to MAKE the time and TAKE the time for YOUheart



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        • 0 votes vote up vote up

          Linni wrote Jul 8, 2010
        • heartheart



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        • 0 votes vote up vote up

          Cheekymonkey wrote Jul 8, 2010
        • estatic that’s it also by forgetting each other we were forgetting ourselves,because hopefully we loved ourselves when we fell in love with our husbands.
          I started losing weight for me found my love of me again and then looked for my love of my husband.
          When I told him I was done maybe I was done with me? And his willingness to change somethings made me want to change somethings in me.
          Still reconnecting with myself and my hubby and it’s like falling in love with both for the 1st time!! (Only difference I hope is that I’m smarter )lol



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