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  • With Age Comes Wisdom - NOT!

    1 posts, 1 voices, 569 views, started Oct 1, 2008

    Posted on Wednesday, October 1, 2008 by Merlotmom

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    • Amethyst
      Offline

      I was always told I’d get smarter as I got older.

      “You’ll understand when you‘re older,” my parents always said when they didn’t want to explain something.

      Well, you know what?  I’m old enough and there’s still a whole lot I don’t get.

      Like why I wasted all those youthful years full of opportunity and promise worrying about superficial things:

      My eyes are two close together.
      My nose droops when I smile.
      My upper lip is thin.
      I hate my pimples.
      My hair’s too thick and wavy.
      I’m not smart enough.
      I need a boyfriend.

      Because now:

      I don’t give a hoot about my eyes, my nose, or my lips.
      I still hate my pimples (yes, I still get them).
      I love my hair.
      I could be smarter but I’m smart enough.
      I have a husband...though sometimes it would be nice to have a boyfriend (shhh).

      So, you see, with age I gave up those frivolous concerns. I’m much more serious now. I have more important things to worry about like:

      The deep wrinkles setting in around my close-set eyes.
      The sun damage breeding on my chest.
      The fact that I have to get my hair colored every 6 weeks to cover the quick sprouting grays.
      The age spots and thinning skin on my hands.
      The fact that I can’t cough or sneeze without peeing in my pants.

      To those who say with age comes wisdom...

      ...WTH!

      With age comes a hundred more shallow reasons to bitch.

      Check back in with me after another decade. Maybe the wisdom will show up by then.



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