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Q & A

How far would you go?  

If you had a friend whose husband was messing around with the secretary (basically everyone knows but her) and also made advances towards you, what would you do?  Tell her personally, send annonymous note or ignore it?




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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Tuliplady wrote Aug 5, 2011
    • I’d ignore it.

      If he’s that bad, she’s probably already got a pretty good idea and is choosing to ignore it or pretend it’s not going on.




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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Cc-u wrote Aug 5, 2011
    • If I were the friend I’d want to be told, because I’d know you cared




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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Mzd3 wrote Aug 6, 2011
    • Tell her.  Cheaters can hide things like that, and she deserves to know.




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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      UK Girl wrote Aug 6, 2011
    • Tell as it hurts when your the last to know and the whole town has been chatting behind your back .......

      I have no idea how but as a friend you can judge this as every situation is different heart




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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Cheekymonkey wrote Aug 6, 2011
    • heart when I was married before my ex cheated and all knew yet no one said anything. I was so hurt by that betrayal especially when he hit on a friend. The way I found out was walking in on him at a friends house at new years eve party even though I had suspicions when I voiced these to my friends no one said a word. The pain and embarrassment I could have been saved.
      So I’d tell. I’d know my facts and I’d tell I would tell so fast it would make your head spin lol and if she was upset I’d take that too knowing I did my part as a friend.




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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      MaryAnne Carrier-Harrison wrote Aug 6, 2011
    • I too was cheated on when I was pregnant and no one had told me I suspected but was never sure. I was very hard to deal with and even tho we are no longer together he still denies it.
      Not a good feeling. I think that if you know he is cheating you should let her know. It is better coming from a friend.

      I would tell her and help her deal with it.




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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Phoenix48079 wrote Aug 6, 2011
    • I would tell. Keeping this a secret would be a betrayal of your friendship. If she has been in denial then you can help her see what the truth is. If she wants to kill the messenger, that is her problem. I personally would not want friends to know and not tell me. It would feel like they were betraying me also.




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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Daphne wrote Aug 6, 2011
    • Call your friend and make a lunch date.  A few days before the lunch date, let her husband know that if he doesn’t tell her before your lunch-date, YOU will be telling her.  Either way, your friend will have you to talk to when she most needs the love and support of someone she trusts.




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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Marya1961 wrote Aug 7, 2011
    • Absolutely tell my friend, as a cheating man to me is lower than scum underneath someone’s shoe and we women often carry an emotional, physical and mental burden on a day to day basis, so she does not need a cheating man added to it.




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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Cathie Beck wrote Aug 7, 2011
    • I would want to be told and most every woman I know would want to be too.  

      Cathie




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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Angelcart wrote Aug 8, 2011
    • I tend to agree with Tulip.  We had a friend who’s husband would sleep with anything that had legs (seriously!).  My girlfriend told her and lo and behold.  She denied and then kicked him and has taken him back.  She know’s.  She just doesn’t want to believe it.  Well guess who she ended up mad at?  that’s right, the girl whol told her.




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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Cathie Beck wrote Aug 8, 2011
    • Well, I think a lot of reasons a woman would prefer to be in denial is they aren’t ready to leave what is familiar to them. The home, the extended family (they may get more from emotionally than from him) and the financial security, children.  

      It takes a lot of guts to walk from a cheater. And I’d still want to know so I could walk!  

      Cathie




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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Mztracy wrote Aug 8, 2011
    • I like Daphne’s idea. Tell the cheating scum that unless he tells you will.

      Find some proof as well...




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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Angelcart wrote Aug 8, 2011
    • @ Cathie, yes it does take guts.  When I found out on my birthday my husband cheated oh and had twins, I sent him walking that night!  It was hard financially, emotionally and all the other stuff but I can tell everyone from experience staying with him........no way could I have done that.




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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Cathie Beck wrote Aug 8, 2011
    • Angel, OMG.... Yes! For me if he’s a cheater he lacks the abiltiy to have regards of others and be responsible for his lack of morals. He’s either worth keeping or worth dumping! It doesn’t have another option to me. LOL  

      I’m so sorry it was your birthday you found out and hope all the rest since have been the most memorable happy birthdays of your life.  

      Hugs,
      Cathie




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