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How do I or should I tell a friend I don’t like to visit because of the smoking?  I love my friends/neighbor of 17 yrs - but example, last night I came home and my clothes and hair smelled so bad that my pet bunnies both jumped up and looked and Phil said Please go shower! That smell is awful. The friends are so sweet, my friend and her mom. They just smoke one after another... I tried saying Im allergic (true) but they turn on a fan... doesnt really help. I don’t want to be rude, but I would like my friends back!

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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Cheekymonkey wrote Aug 11, 2011
    • heart as a smoker,that doesn’t allow it in my house, car or anywhere enclosed you just tell them. As a smoker I know non smokers hate the smell. I believe if you are having company then u do so by making them comfortable.
      If I go to someones house that doesn’t smoke I smoke outside and away from all.
      It’s respect on both sides
      Now with that said u know she smokes so going over there is your choice maybe sit outside or invite her over or meet elsewhere. It’s a total give and take situation
      But if I have ppl over then what I’ve said above applies but that’s me




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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Msj wrote Aug 11, 2011
    • Thanks Cheeky. I know, I havn’t been over in a while....  (they are wondering if I was upset)...and when I have company over I have a patio.for the smokers...

      They invited me to watch a movie in the morning and have coffee....guesse I’ll just suck it up.

      The smell is tolerable if ppl go outside... like my other friends they do not smoke in their apt.... we sit outside... but this is a tiny apt. and they each smoke about a pack a day.....  

      OMGosh I just noticed how I WORDED that LMAO!  It looks like “My pet bunnies jumped up and looked Phil and said.. ”
      You obviously got it... it WAS Phil who did they talking OMG I cracked myself up.




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    • +1 votes vote up vote up

      Cheekymonkey wrote Aug 11, 2011
    • heartheart I’m so glad the bunnies aren’t talking otherwise I’d have bigger issues lmao.




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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Frannie1964 wrote Aug 12, 2011
    • If they are good friends then they should understand and respect you as a guest and a friend by not smoking inside. Even if it’s their place, they know your allergic to the smoke but turning a fan on isn’t enough, then they should step out onto a patio and smoke. Just saying. Be honest with them and let them know. You would like to spend more time with them and you enjoy their company but you cannot deal with the smoke and your s/o doesn’t like the smell it leaves on you when you go home. Why should you have to suck it up?

      Anyhow, I hope things work out.happy




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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Linda L wrote Aug 12, 2011
    • Agree with both Cheeky and Frannie. You‘re not being rude at all for being honest with them that it affects your health. Friends understand and are respectful.




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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Joanmarie wrote Aug 12, 2011
    • I agree with Cheeky, Frannie, and Linda...just be honest!




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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Cathie Beck wrote Aug 12, 2011
    • Msj, I agree with the other Ladies. Just explain the straight up facts to them nicely. They don’t realize how their home reeks of the smoke.  

      Cathie




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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Butterflyrose wrote Aug 12, 2011
    • Begin by letting your friends know how much you value their friendship. Then, tell them that your health will not allow you to be in a smoke-filled atmosphere.

                       An act of kindness is a gift given

                                Butterflyrose




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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Tuliplady wrote Aug 12, 2011
    • My neighbor’s house is the same way.  If I go over to visit him I say “let’s sit out on the deck, it’s such a nice day”




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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Mztracy wrote Aug 12, 2011
    • just tell them!




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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Kyah wrote Aug 12, 2011
    • When my non-smoking friends come to visit, I just wait until they go home to smoke, and when I visit their places I smoke before and after not during my stay. But it sounds like you have chain smokers, and I think they should take it outside at least when you come to visit.




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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Msj wrote Aug 12, 2011
    • Thanks for all the input! yes, a few occasions I have spent the night and the next day I am coughing up junk.... ewww

      I will figure out how to say it... you are all good!




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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Marya1961 wrote Aug 14, 2011
    • I wish that would work with everyone, but I have a dear friend who is addicted to cigarettes, and she will continue to smoke in her own house whether someone has asked politely or not...one time I was over and she was smoking, her father and her friend also were smoking...I had to leave after 15 minutes...it clogs my sinuses and upsets my stomach terribly...so these days, we sit in the yard.




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