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I need to know what would you do if your friend husband was having an affair, would you tell  her or not?

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    • +1 votes vote up vote up

      Tuliplady wrote Oct 6, 2013
    • Stay out of it!!!!!




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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Mzd3 wrote Oct 6, 2013
    • Tulip, would you want to know if it was your husband ? I would want to know.




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    • +1 votes vote up vote up

      Tuliplady wrote Oct 6, 2013
    • It’s not that I wouldn’t want to know, I wouldn’t want someone, even my very bestest friend sticking their nose into it.  

      Chances are pretty good she knows already and may be in denial/not want to deal with it right now.  So, she’s not going to thank you for telling her something she doesn’t want to hear.   Or, she may know about it and be trying to keep things together the best she can and doesn’t need someone else telling her what’s going on with her own life.  And on the slim chance she DOESN‘T know, she’s going to assume you are lying to her.

      That’s just my take on it.  I’ve been thru a lot of tough patches in my marriages and personally I have nevr welcomed a third person’s input.




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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Linda L wrote Oct 6, 2013
    • Good question. I guess it depends on how good of a friend she is. Whenever I see my friend, I’d probably want to tell her, but it’s not my business. However, if she confides in me that she has suspicions I might tell her.  

      If it was my husband, I would want to know.




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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Denise Richardson wrote Oct 6, 2013
    • Years ago I saw my best friend at the time hubby out n a night club cuddled up with another woman and when he saw me he left, to this very day they are still married and I never told her, I don’t feel it’s our place to tell, to help destroy another’s marriage by telling.




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    • +1 votes vote up vote up

      Tuliplady wrote Oct 6, 2013
    • Also, what we think  we know about a situation may not always be what is actually going on.




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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Linda L wrote Oct 6, 2013
    • Tulip - you‘re right, people make assumptions and it’s not so.




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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Mzd3 wrote Oct 7, 2013
    • I guess it’s possible that she knows and doesn’t care...or an open relationship. Myself, I would want to know. And if a good friend knew and didn’t tell me, we would no longer be friends.




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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Cynthia Schmidt wrote Oct 7, 2013
    • If I knew with all certainty, I would gently say something to her. If it was me, I would want to know.

      I had an acquaintance years ago who’s husband was having an affair. Other husbands in a group of friends knew and didn’t say anything. When it was all discovered, not only did the couple break up but the friends who’s husbands knew began having marital problems as well because they kept it secret from their wives. It was a mess.




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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Nita P wrote Oct 7, 2013
    • i would approach the husband




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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Marya1961 wrote Oct 8, 2013
    • It depends on the friend and the circumstances.  I would sure hope if it were me, that a friend would give me this information and I could then confront my husband.

      BTW, it is always a good idea to snap a photo with your cell phone and then you do have proof.




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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Jc2222 wrote Oct 8, 2013
    • I would ask her if someone knew her husband were having an affair would she want to know. If she says yes, then I would tell her what I know. If she says no, then she probably already knows and doesn’t want to talk about it. I would drop the subject and not bring it up again.




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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Brimstone1968 wrote Oct 8, 2013
    • Actually I was caught dead in the middle in a situation like this.  I saw and knew one of my besties husband was cheating on her.  Yes, I did approach him about it because I kept seeing them at places and doing activities together so I spoke to him about it.  The wife found out through a letter she found at her home written by the girl who was there friend and visited the home.  He came clean and they worked through it.  

      However, about 1 year later I saw the same things happening again this time I did not say anything to him.  When she found out and asked me if I knew and I was honest and I told her yes she was angry as hell with me.  She felt like I had betrayed her by not telling her, coming to their home and knowing he was having this woman still.  

      For me, I spoke to him the first time and the second time I was not doing it.  To tell her was going to be painful and I chose not to that is how I handled it.

      I think it depends on the relationship you have with your friends.  However, for me I would like to be informed.




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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Vikki Hall wrote Oct 15, 2013
    • Chances are the wife knows something is up with her husband. And if not that is just as telling about the state of their relationship.

      I probably would go to the husband and tell him to confess otherwise I will have to go his wife.




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