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How do you learn to accept yourself as you are (loosely translated to mean - naked in the mirror)?
I’ve made all kinds of changes. It takes time.
I was once over 200 lbs. Now I’m 110-115. That took 1 year the hard way. (not recomended)
Do you know my hair fell out over a perm a couple of years ago. I love my hair now, thanks to rogain.
It’s not all physical either. I remember when I really wanted a boyfriend, to the point I felt pain over it. It took years to realize I was better off without. I just can’t believe I started dating again recently. This relationship thing has taken several years and a lot of self reflection. I got rid of the parts of me I didn’t like.
I guess I didn’t accept all of who I was but I knew I was in there someplace.
Hi Connie
This is a very good question. I’ve struggled with it all my life. I’ve always had issues about the way I look. As I’ve gotten older, I have done my best to focus on things about myself that I really appreciate. I’m a kind person, I’m a loving partner, I really like who I am. Doing that has created a foundation for me to build on. then when I see something that tugs at me that I’m not pleased about, (my weight) I have a base of positive feelings. That keeps my spirits lifted and prevents me from beating myself up. For me, that is the road to acceptance.
Best to you
Cynthia
For years I pinched and bitched about my fat here, my cellulite there.
After a long time I realized that I am beautiful. I know I am. I take care of myself, and although I am not perfect, i have learned to love my body and prefer to walk around naked.
We are blessed with beautiful bodies, and no matter your size you should love yourself.
Look at yourself in the mirror and look beyond your perfections, look at you-you that you have known for so many years.
You will see beauty.
It is not easy. I was always very petite and could eat whatever I wanted. After 35 my metabolism took a dive. Still, I was OK but just walked more often and with 5 kids, sitting wasn’t an option. I was never the size 4/6 I was in my thirties but as I approached my 40’s as a size 8, I started to accept the flaws that were fast approaching. Flaws...well, that’s subjective but we‘re all harsh critics.
I gained 15 lbs after two surgeries this year. 15 doesn’t sound like a lot but it’s enough and hard to get rid of because I’m not exactly a gazelle with a knee that just won’t respond to surgery.
So, I stayed away from relationship for two reasons: I thought no one would date me because I often need a cane to balance myself (hopefully a knee replacement will solve that!!) and because how on earth would I take my clothes off in front of someone when I had a little skinny knee, chubby thighs and more curves than a winding road???
When I met up with the man I am now dating, again (after re-connecting after 4 years...when I was FIT!!!) last month, I knew we had an incredible connection yet I pretended to have no interest. Well, for the first hour...ha ha. Bottom line...he didn’t care about my cute leopard print cane and said I looked great. That’s not the first time that I’ve heard the curvier women with imperfect bodies catch a man’s eye more than the model.
So, now I am cherishing the roadmap called my body...naked...in the ever present full length mirror in my room. It’s not easy seeing age set in but it’s great to know that someone thinks I’m just as special and even more so...naked or not.
Wow, this is pretty revealing, huh? I love this site for that reason.
I’m sure you look marvelous. So what if you don’t look like the cover of some airbrushed magazine.....the fact that you look real is even more beautiful.
I’ve come to realize that my moment of “yuck” is just that - a moment and it passed with the help of everyone on this site who has reminded me that I am beautiful. The only thing that matters is what I think about myself and I have changed my perception the last couple of days.
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with other like minded women.