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anonymous Anonymous

Q & A

My husband and I have been married now 10 yrs. He is an ex-crack cocaine user but has been clean for over 20 yrs. Due to the stress of the economy and him and I both losing our job/benefits with him being the sole provider of the household, he is acting a little strange. His attitude is always nasty towards me, anyhow and he never seems to want to spend time with me, but can spend money on what he likes to do, and buy the things he likes for himself. I have noticed this great change in him lately and was wondering if he is secretly using again. He eats a lot of junk food when he shouldn’t because of his other health issues for one he is a diabetic, I don’t think I could live with him if he is using drugs again, how would I know? Can anyone give me a clue?

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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Mzd3 wrote Aug 1, 2009
    • I have a friend who is a nurse , and she just went through a simialar situation. She went to the pharmacy and bought a over the counter drug test and tested him.  He was losing weight like crazy then began to have nose bleeds, thats what tipped her off. Good Luck.




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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Angell VillafaƱe wrote Aug 1, 2009
    • I was married for ten years to a crack addict...but thankfully now I am divorced. You are suspicious for good reason and it wouldn’t be a bad idea to have him tested...but would he agree? My ex never would consent to a drug test. There are alot of signs to tell whether he is using again. But just because he is acting a little strange doesn’t necessarily mean he is using again. It could just be the stress of him losing his job. Don’t assume the worse but definitely keep your eyes open. Telltale signs that I came to be familiar with over the 10 years I was married were very little apetite and weight loss, easily agitated, paranoid, spending lots of money and no way to account for it, staying away from home for long periods of time. Living with an addict is no picnic, trust me. I hope and pray for the sake of your marriage that is not what is happening. Good luck...I hope it’s not what you suspect.




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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Esther Bloom wrote Aug 2, 2009
    • @0 years clean does not mean anything its in the “one day at a time” thing that keeps people sober. You did not mention if he was in a program or not. Its been my experience that when there are changes in my man’s daily behavior that there is one of two things going on.... he’s using again or is having an affair..... men aren’t very good at hiding things. I will pray for you and just remember its your choice to find out whats going on just by asking or continue to try and guess...Thinking about the situation only makes your head spin.....happy




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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Deanna Moon wrote Aug 2, 2009
    • I do know typically cocaine or crack addicts usually don’t eat, or eat very little.  Pot smoking can contribute to over eating of junk food, does he smoke?  Depression can also make a person over eat, and exhibit self destructive habits also, and as a Diabetic, junk food would be considered self destructive, and/or not caring about himself.  Men aren’t too hard to figure out, so I’m sure you’ll figure out what’s going on soon.  Drug test him?  Most addicts would totally refuse to get tested, so if he refuses, there’s your answer probably.  Good Luck.




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