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Q & A

If you had the choice to do it all over again, would you stay home raising kids vs going back to being a working mom/career woman?

And what advice would you give to your own daughter?

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Best Answer

I would definely stay home to raise my kids as I did, but I would do it a little differently.  I would be sure that I had prepared myself first to support us all independently so if the need arose, as it did, I would be able to provide comfortably for my family.  We all get married thinking it is going to last forever.  With work on both sides, it will.  But...sometimes it doesn’t and it can be tough for both you and the kids if you aren’t prepared to stand totally on your own two feet.  That’s my advice to my daughters. Besides, if you have that security and are empowered by your own self-knowledge, you are less likely to compromise where you really shouldn’t compromise.


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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Anonymous wrote Jul 15, 2008
    • I would go back and change a few minor things. I would continue working, however I would come home earlier to see my children, and make the most of our time together on the weekends and in the mornings.




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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Blueiris1261 wrote Jul 15, 2008
    • I would definely stay home to raise my kids as I did, but I would do it a little differently.  I would be sure that I had prepared myself first to support us all independently so if the need arose, as it did, I would be able to provide comfortably for my family.  We all get married thinking it is going to last forever.  With work on both sides, it will.  But...sometimes it doesn’t and it can be tough for both you and the kids if you aren’t prepared to stand totally on your own two feet.  That’s my advice to my daughters. Besides, if you have that security and are empowered by your own self-knowledge, you are less likely to compromise where you really shouldn’t compromise.




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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Amy L. Harden wrote Jul 16, 2008
    • I gave up a very lucrative and exciting career as a Navy Broadcast Journalist when my second daughter was born.  I made this choice so I could take care of my children and be able to follow my husband around as the Navy transferred us from command to command.  This was after traveling around the world, pursuing a modeling career in Japan, competing in several beauty pageants, covering several historical events and accomplishing many of my career goals.  If I had remained in service, my children would have had to be in Day Care and I would have had to be separated from them for six months at a time when on deployment.  NAH!!!! I would not change this decision.  Also, we would not have had the pleasure of having my three other children in this world...my husband and I would have surely divorced due to separation and an inability to keep our marriage and family alive.

      I do not regret being a SAHM and now that they are older and so am I...we all are more wiser and able to handle Mom following her dreams...when they were young they would have never understood.  At the same time, I advise my daughters to follow their dreams now...do not put them off till after they marry or have children...do not become old and full of regret...do not vicariously live through your children...do not burden them with your dreams...start building your legacy now...not later...it is a life-long endeavor!  As long as they strive to be women of excellence, significance and grace in all the roles they decide to take on, they will leave a legacy of AWE...each will be a woman of elegance.  This is a legacy that can be passed down generation to generation.




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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Kathy Palomo wrote Sep 20, 2008
    • I have pondered this and think that if I had it to do again I would have stayed at home.




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